I feel stupid - did 'softening' on my hair

ok so I haven't written in a while cause I've been ashamed and didn't wanna tell my story...but now I'm gonna tell you guys what happened:
about 2 months ago (in Feb) I went to a salon in Toronto that deals with Ouidad cuts and treatments and stuff...the guy said that they did hte ouidad softening so I wanted to do it....
First of all it didn't really do much to my hair (my hair did not turn out like Beachblondewavie's) the only thing it did was dry out my hair....so now I'm stuck with the same curls I always had but with super dry hair...I feel stupid...I really shouldn't have done it
What can I do to get moisture back into my hair? I know I should deep condition but is there anything else?
Even my hairdresser told me the guy didn't do it evenly so now the underneath is more curly than the top...
I mean if I showed you a picture you guys probably wouldn't be able to see the difference but to me it just feels so dry
Was 3b then I did a soft relaxer and I think I'm now a 3a
pw: curly
I know BeachBlondeWavie likes the proteinpacked deepconditioner from Quidad. Maybe it can save your hair.

& please dont feel stupid, I just cut my own bangs a few days ago...not to pleased about it, but hair will grow out
Hugs!
2C/3A,jetblack indian curls
thanx
I actually bought this deep conditioner when I did the softening...
I know...it's really not that bad looking....just really dry
Was 3b then I did a soft relaxer and I think I'm now a 3a
pw: curly
Have you tried a honey and molasses treatment? I used to do this until my hair started getting too soft (over-conditioned).

I'll warn you, it is very messy and smelly, but it really works. Coat your hair with honey,molasses, or a combination of the two, put on a plastic cap for at least an hour, then rinse thoroughly.
YES WE CAN!

kdcreigh 4a and b (who knows?)

Relegated to occasional lurking in order to keep the PJ in check!


http://public.fotki.com/kdcreigh/
PW: natural
The Ouidad DT is high in protein (good for damaged hair) so if you do use it, you probably want to follow up with a moisturizing DT (like Jessicurl WDT) so your hair doesn't feel straw-like.
Faith, 3Aish redhead
Mama to two wild superheroes and a curly-headed baby boy
Please don't feel stupid, I think those of us who are a bit adventuresome get into a pickle from time to time, and although maybe it's not the best way to learn it's a very effective one right?

On the positive side, this is a great time for you to experiment with all kinds of new things such as different types of nourishing oils like coconut, avocado, jojoba, shea butter, etc. which work best when applied on damp hair. I know Ouidad is sort of anti-oil but trust me, if we didn't need any we wouldn't produce sebum.

There are also natural (and not-so-natural) recipes that abound here and all over the "Net" so you can have some fun trying them out without having to spend gobs of money. If you find that putting molasses or honey directly on your hair is too messy for you, consider adding some (a tablespoon would be enough) to your regular DT and just keep it on your covered head for 1/2 an hour. Also consider putting pure aloe vera gel on your hair (the edible kind sold in health food stores), maybe mixed with an oil and leave it on your hair overnight, it has a very softening effect that may help even out your curls a bit.

If you shampoo, dilute it before using so it will be less drying and if you're only using Ouidad's conditioner as a staple now I recommend that you alternate it with a less pricey yet more moisturizing one so you can give your dry hair more rounded care. And when you rinse it out try leaving some of it in.

Please keep us posted about your progress, I'm sure that if you're diligent in giving your hair TLC you will get results very soon!
2A/3A, medium length, layered, colored dark/medium ash blonde - "CGer" since April '02.

"Converting the 'curlskeptics' one curly head at a time..." HWHC
I personally wouldn't suggest protein if your hair is already dry. Protein tends to dry out hair. You need a good moisturizing treatment. I'm still looking for the perfect one, though. *sigh*
Guide18
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I personally wouldn't suggest protein if your hair is already dry. Protein tends to dry out hair. You need a good moisturizing treatment. I'm still looking for the perfect one, though. *sigh*
Originally Posted by Fluffy01
Actually, protein is probably a good idea in this case, since it's good for damaged hair and the softening probably caused some damage. As PixieCurl said, following a protein DT with a moisturizing conditioner will prevent the dry feeling.
thanx everyone for the suggestions

I used to use honey mixed in with conditioner in my hear a couple years ago and I found the effects to be really nice, but the honey tended to leave my hair a little on the sticky side (even if I did add lots of condish to it and rinsed it all out and then added more condish)...
also the Ouidad products....I used them once in a while but I really don't like them...I find them incredibly drying...like when I use their gel I get frizz city...I dunno why cause a lot of others have had success with these products but I guess my hair is just really particular....

I still haven't found a gel or a conditioner that truly works on me....

Honestly for the past two months I've been straightening almost every time because my hair has been soooooo horrible curly....the past few days are the first days in a long time that I left it curly and I still had to use a curling iron to help the curls....

of course I know all the additional heat styling is definitely not helping the dryness situation, I'm not willing not to heat style because my hair is just really really horrible without it...

Do you guys know of any good products that can help when heat styling as well?
Was 3b then I did a soft relaxer and I think I'm now a 3a
pw: curly
I straighten very infrequently so I can't recommend any specific products, but since silicones have heat-protectant properties that's what you would have to use when straightening. However, to continue to straighten your chemically processed hair (that already has clear signs of damage) constitutes IMHO "hair suicide" so continue at your own risk...

There are a couple of very inexpensive and very moisturizing gels that I'd like to suggest. Both can be obtained from many drugstores and/or department stores such as K-mart, Wal-mart and Target . They are: 1) Fruit of The Earth 100% Aloe Vera Gel. Although not shown there, it comes in other sizes and presentations, for instance mine is in a 20 oz. pump bottle; its hold seems to vary from person to person, personally I have to mix it with something else. 2) Organic Root Stimulator Lock & Twist Gel, You will notice that free samples are available for a minimal S&H charge. When I saw it at a beauty supply I decided to purchase it based on the ingredients rather than the name and I'm glad I did. By itself the hold was too light for me but when I mixed it with the "FOTE" it was perfect, I absolutely love how my hair looks and feels when I use this combo and the main advantage of using these is that their mostly natural ingredients will nourish the hair rather than drying it out as it often happens with other gels.
2A/3A, medium length, layered, colored dark/medium ash blonde - "CGer" since April '02.

"Converting the 'curlskeptics' one curly head at a time..." HWHC
to be honest with you I've noticed that when I straighten it it's a lot less dry than when I leave it curly....like I had it curly the last couple days and when I washed it it felt like yarn....I had to condition it like 3 times...but when it's straight it doesn't feel like this in the shower...
also when I straighten it I don't do it as often - about once a week, and then leave it for the rest of the week, yet when it's curly I'm constantly fixing it with a curling iron....
trust me if you had my hair you'd understand...it's not normal curly hair...
Was 3b then I did a soft relaxer and I think I'm now a 3a
pw: curly
When I did a relaxer last April it TOTALLY fried my hair. And unfortnately the damage didn't show up til a while down the road. Protein treatments are necessary if your hair has a lot of damage, and since the bonds have been chemically reconstructed, it's probably a good idea. I used Nexxus Emergencee afterwards, and it helped a TON. It's a reconstructer, not a conditioner, so you are going to have to use a conditioner afterwards b/c it makes your hair feel really gross and dry while you're using it. The bottle says to leave it on for 1 - 2 minutes, but I would let it sit for 10 or 20.

For moisturizing treatments, I really like Jessicurl Too Shea!, but you can make some at home too. I mix about 2 tblsp of olive oil, with a couple of tblsp of conditioner, Aloe Vera gel, and either honey or molasses. That is a great deep conditioner - although it can smell kind of gross!

Cut back on your shampooing too (if you do shampoo) b/c that's obviously going to dry out your hair more. I'm also in the process (still) of rebuilding my hair after relaxing, and repeated coloring. For gel, I'm using plain old Aloe Vera Gel. It works the best, and I know it's more moisturizing than a regular gel. If you have a health food store in the area, I would suggest getting the edible Aloe Vera, b/c it's natural, more moisturizing, and it seems to have more curl enhancing properties.

I know what you're saying about your hair, and I know how it feels to just want it to be straight b/c it will be easier, but honestly there's no such thing as "normal curly hair". I think the problem many people - even ones on this site - have is that they keep thinking they don't have ENOUGH curl, and they always need to make their hair curlier. There are always questions on how people can make their hair curlier.

Personally, I think it's about accepting the natural curl pattern that you have, and learning to work with that, as opposed to making it more or less.
~ the artist formerly known as babywavy ~

Please excuse any typos. For the time being, we are blaming it on my computer.
to be honest with you I've noticed that when I straighten it it's a lot less dry than when I leave it curly....like I had it curly the last couple days and when I washed it it felt like yarn....I had to condition it like 3 times...but when it's straight it doesn't feel like this in the shower...
also when I straighten it I don't do it as often - about once a week, and then leave it for the rest of the week, yet when it's curly I'm constantly fixing it with a curling iron....
trust me if you had my hair you'd understand...it's not normal curly hair...
Originally Posted by butterflyPrincess777
Thanks for the clarification, once a week is not so bad. I'm just used to hearing most people straighten almost daily so it was easy to jump to that conclusion. When I straighten I usually roll it up in "barrel curls" at bedtime and that way it lasts me several days before having to wash again otherwise it wouldn't be worth it for me to go through the trouble since I'm so used now to how easy it is for me to diffuse for about 10 mins. and air drying the rest of the way or air drying completely.

I think I do understand how you feel, 4 years ago when I decided to lighten my hair it wasn't done right the first time around so I had to have additional bleaching and it damaged the last 4" of my hair which were left barely wavy and rather limp. I had to resort to roller sets most of the time.

And now that I've mentioned roller sets, I'd like to say that this is a styling method truly worth the trouble of learning because it protects the hair while leaving it looking healthy (because it forces the cuticle shut) and has the great advantage that with minimal effort one can make it last up to a week. If it interests you, I have in my files 4 pages with illustrated instructions on how to do it, all you need to do is PM me with your e-mail address and I'll be glad to send them to you.
2A/3A, medium length, layered, colored dark/medium ash blonde - "CGer" since April '02.

"Converting the 'curlskeptics' one curly head at a time..." HWHC

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