my mom says she doesn't like my curly hair :(

I used to straighten my hair a lot, but I decided to stop once I started the CG routine. I felt really good about wearing my hair curly and I hadn't straightened it for about 3 months, until the other day when I got my hair cut and decided to get it straightened just for a change. When I got home my mom raved about how good it looked and how it suits me so much better than my curly hair and insisted that I should straighten it more often.

Then today I washed it and was really happy with how my curls looked after the cut and said to my mom, "SEE! do you really think my curls are bad?" and she said, "well they aren't BAD... but your hair just looks so much better straight, the curls just do nothing for you. well honestly, i don't like your curls". Agh!! I finally like my 3b curls after YEARS of hating them, and my mom tells me they're ugly! It's so frustrating! I actually have really nice curls, and I'm just so sick of all this crap against curly hair...
How can they do nothing for you? They ARE you, kwim? I'm sorry your mom was being so insensitive! I know other curlies will have more advice for ya....just want to let you know not to let opinion get to you. You're hair is beautiful!!
2A/2B, fine, normal porosity

Growing out a pixie as of November 2013

Shampoo: Elucence MBS & Renpure Originals Argan Oil
Conditioner: Elucence MBC & Renpure Originals Argan Oil
Leave-in: CJ BeautiCurls
Stylers: BA gel & AG Re:coil

Product Junkie that keeps falling off the wagon!
Ok so you love your Mum, of course, but you're your own person and if you want to wear your curls, then wear them! I'm sure as she sees how happy and confident you are with them she'll come round.
Don't know what my hair type is really!!

pw: hairdrama
Last time I used straightners: Friday 17th May (I'm really trying now!)
Weeeelllll, I don't want to contribute to the delinquency of a minor (I'm assuming) but I'm the kinda girl that does the opposite of what my mom thinks. Not in the big things, just in things like fashion and stuff like that. If we ever go shopping together and she says "oo, I like that" about a shirt or whatever I quickly put it back on the rack. LOL

I say wear your hair the way you want (doesn't she?) and be proud of your beautiful curls! I'd love to have 3b curls!! {hugs}
~Melanie~ 2B/C depending on my hair's mood
Trying to find a routine my hair likes!
[
My mom doesn't like my music or my movies, they're not supposed to like the same things we do or else we'd just be clones ya know?
You'll just have to get your curly compliments here is all Curly is all the rage now, haven't you noticed how many shows and movies have curly haired actors now? Even straighties are mimicing curls, we're in vogue baby!
2c/3a?
Low porosity, medium texture.
http://public.fotki.com/Medusahair/

If it smells good put it in your hair, if it tastes good spit it out!
That's true, I have noticed that there are a lot more curlies on tv. I'd like to see more wavies, though. LOL Then I wouldn't feel like such an oddball.
~Melanie~ 2B/C depending on my hair's mood
Trying to find a routine my hair likes!
[
well naturally i told my mom i'm never straightening it again. i agree with what everyone said, but it's frustrating when even your mom doesn't like your curls! by the way, i just made a flickr with pictures of my curls...
it can be tough whenever your mom disapproves of something that you like, but it can be particularly hurtful if she dislikes something that's a part of you--your style, your music, your weight, your hair (the list goes on). as difficult as that is and as much as you want your mom's approval, remember that personal decisions like this belong to YOU and you only. as CurlyJoviFan said, you are your own person, so if your curls are important to you, then enjoy them!

also, i looked at your photos just now, and your curls are GORGEOUS!
also, i looked at your photos just now, and your curls are GORGEOUS!
Originally Posted by curlyincollege
I agree!! I stand by my statement!!
2A/2B, fine, normal porosity

Growing out a pixie as of November 2013

Shampoo: Elucence MBS & Renpure Originals Argan Oil
Conditioner: Elucence MBC & Renpure Originals Argan Oil
Leave-in: CJ BeautiCurls
Stylers: BA gel & AG Re:coil

Product Junkie that keeps falling off the wagon!
I know how you feel. My dad thinks my curls are ugly! He doesn't even look me in the face when I wear my hair down, its as though he can't bear to look at the abomination that is my curly hair!!

It doesn't help when people rave about how great your hair looks straight, I've had that too, "you look younger, smarter, more chic, stylish", and on it goes. I even started to believe it myself, and on my down days, I still do.

These days, if people are negative about my hair, I turn it into a joke, look horrified at them and say "SHHHHHH, my curls are sensitive, and they can hear you!" or something silly like that. NC.com has really boosted my love of my curls. I

Hats off to you for sticking to your guns on this. Your curls are lovely, they suit you beautifully, and they show off all the different shades and tones in your hair, something I think straight hair can't do quite so well. And don't forget you have an ARMY of curlies on your side here
Here are my curly pics, password is fuzz

http://public.fotki.com/zeldagoblin/

But then again, too few to mention...
Well I think your curls are beautiful! They are so uniform & fun! My mom, husband & even I like my hair better straight to - it's tough.

Kim
Type: 2c, medium/high porosity, high density, course.
Cleanse: Curls unleashed shampoo
Leave-in: KCKT, Curlsunleashed leave in.
Style: Argan oil
DT: Aussie 3 min. miracle or olive/coconut oil.
Oh my goodness, your hair is GORGEOUS!!

It's really hard when your husband doesn't like your hair. He likes curly hair (he says) but then he'll throw out a comment like "you look homeless". Then the next day he'll say "Wow, I love your hair today!" Uhhh...it's the same that it was when you said I was homeless!
~Melanie~ 2B/C depending on my hair's mood
Trying to find a routine my hair likes!
[

These days, if people are negative about my hair, I turn it into a joke, look horrified at them and say "SHHHHHH, my curls are sensitive, and they can hear you!" or something silly like that.
Originally Posted by zeldagoblin
That is a GREAT comeback for any negative comment made by anyone! NC.com should make this a sticky note and put it at the top of the forum.

Frizz Happens!


my Fotki hair journey/experiment diary PW is brio (and I really need to update it!)

3A hair; coloring with henna/indigo since July 2009; normally follow the CG method. Still searching for my HG products!

Well, I'm sorry that your mom feels that way about your curls. Does she have straight hair or does she straighten hers?
Anyway, your curls are gorgeous! I wish that mine were that tight! I think you look better with the curls! The curls give you flair! With straight hair I think you would just blend in with the crowd!
~~jax
2c or 3a Cut most of my hair off in July '12 and am working on regrowing it.
I think your hair looks GREAT! Stay confident and mom will back off!
3B, I think w/very thick hair, shoulder length. Fall hair: Low Poo, TS, CK, Aloeba leave in, recoil or RR, plop, BRHG or SMU, no blow dry.
well naturally i told my mom i'm never straightening it again. i agree with what everyone said, but it's frustrating when even your mom doesn't like your curls! by the way, i just made a flickr with pictures of my curls...
Originally Posted by fluffywonderdoodle
your curls are just adorable!! i am probably older than your mother and you should hear the crap i get about my curls and my long 3b hair. i just laugh. when my mom was alive sometimes she'd look and ask if i had combed my hair lately. too bad she did not live to see me as a curly girl with my new routine. give your mom a big hug and tell her you love her, and that your hair will stay curly because YOU like it. (as do the folks on nc.com!)
banjo
Susan suburban NY
3b going gray, not thick, waist length when wet, a bit below shoulders when dry
CG since 11/11/04
http://public.fotki.com/banjolady/
PW: banjo
HG: suave and honey for co-wash, deva, i use garnier fructis regular CO's or boots pink or white as leave ins and LA looks sport gel. plop w microfiber turban, then curl towel scrunch, then another turban.i sleep with the turban on. little one minute hair styling videos http://www.youtube.com/user/lazycurls
I'm a mom, and I think my hair is beautiful! In fact I'm disappointed that neither of my daughters have any curl to their hair yet, though puberty is what brought out my curls, so time will tell!

Honestly, it seems like a lot of people will see curly/wavy hair as messy. I did in the past. But our hair isn't messy, it's natural and healthy! I think it's worse when your mom thinks that way. It's just that she's got that parental thing going: Brush your hair, wash your face, tuck in your shirt, isn't that skirt too tight/short... this is one of the only times I will tell a daughter to stand strong...you know what is best for you and you hair, it's wonderful.
3a/2c
Trader Joe's Tingle conditioner wash/ conditioner
AG re:coil, LALooks gel, John Frieda Secret Weapon
My mom will say something like "your so lucky to have those curls" and then she will start messing with them....like she's trying to put them in their "correct spot". LOL. Good luck with that Mom.

I think you have gorgeous curls. I have curl envy
Handle every stressful situation like a dog. If you can't eat it or hump it.....Piss on it and walk away.
Location - WI
The thing about mothers is that sometimes when they are trying to help you out by giving motherly advice, their comments can sometimes be hurtful. Your mom is used to seeing your hair straight, and now that you are wearing your hair curly you have an entirely different look, which is a big change that will take her some time to get comfortable with. After a while she will probably prefer your curly locks to your straight look. But in any case, who cares what other people think? It's your hair, so wear it the way you want!
Black, shoulder length 3B

Law Student at Wayne State University, Class of 2010
I'm sorry that your mom hurt your feelings. I'm sure she didn't mean to. I think hair looks best in its natural state, be it curly or straight or whatever -- just healthy hair! At least you love your curls and that is what is really most important!
3B with some 3a. Fell off but am now back on the CG bandwagon and looking for my HG products.

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