Nice comebacks/retorts?

violetcurls's Avatar
Join Date: May 2008
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What are the best comebacks for when someone insults your hair? Traditionally, if someone insults me I normally get pretty angry/mad (though I end up doing nothing except glare at the person for who knows how long, maybe). I've also found that if I have something to say already, I normally won't say anything stupid that will cause even more problems. And the comment doesn't bug me as much. So I'm wondering if there are any things I can say to defend myself without being totally mean or rude. Or should I just learn to deal with it? I mean, I'll survive if I don't say anything. It's what I've always done (despite extreme temptations to do otherwise). But I feel that some of these people just keep doing it. How can I let these people know that I can hear and speak?

The current retort I've been using for a little while (for various and sundry things) is "Thank you for your opinion. I'll be sure to file that away for the day I actually care." Haven't used it very often, though.


Oh, P.S. I'm not a mean person. It's just sometimes I don't speak up enough, and they walk over me (again... and again....). I'm not asking for insults, I'm asking for something to say.
3a/b ?

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I'm a little unclear; why are people insulting your hair? I dont know your age, are they kids?
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violetcurls's Avatar
Join Date: May 2008
Posts: 434
Yeah, mostly. Somedays I just think they're in a bad mood. Others I'm having a bad hair day. Somedays they just might be bored. Plus, I'm a pretty easy target. Again, no big deal. It's just getting really tiresome. It doesn't even have to be something really clever. Just what non-mean things can you say in a situation like this?
3a/b ?

Unleash the curls!

Nobody move! I dropped me brain. ~Jack Sparrow

Last edited by violetcurls; 05-29-2008 at 08:27 PM.
I usually either say, "I love my hair!" or I just give them a look like "you realize what you just said, right" and then a big "Thank you!" as unsarcastically as I can. (which is sometimes not very)
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well i might say something like "well i like it so i guess its good that it is on my head and not yours"
basically a big i dont give a eff what you think!
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Quote:
by: Riot Crrl!
I think you could walk around with words and stick people drawn on your face and still look supercute.
When someone is rude, I will sometimes just say, very matter of factly, "That's so rude." And then immediately change the subject, leave the room, whatever.

If you do insult them back no matter how good it feels to get that dig in you're lowering yourself to their level.

I like misfit's suggestion. It makes the point without returning the rudeness. It's classy.
When someone is rude like that, I usually just say, "Do you feel better now? Did you get your daily 'ego boost' from that? I mean, I'd hate to think you wasted your breath."

The really smart alec types (teen age girls, in my experience) will come back with "yeah, I did" and smirk because they're too stupid to know they've been insulted. To which I reply, "so glad I could help. I'll put it on your tab," and walk away.

When they realize they're not getting a rise out of you, they'll stop. The boost they're looking for by being mean to you doesn't happen, so they start looking for other outlets that give them what they need.
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In the UK the fashion is for hair straightened to within an inch of its life. Someone at work with artificially poker-straight hair said 'Oooo, curls' to me in a sarcastic voice.

I smiled sweetly and said yes, isn't lovely to have the confidence to wear my hair as I want to, as nature intended, and not have to follow fashion like the rest of the sheep.

She couldn't think of a reply and just looked at me

I then went for the kill and said that I have such a full and busy life - family, career, social life, retail therapy, voluntary work - I simply don't have time to spare to straighten - you must have PLENTY of time.........

She just looked at me again and started talking about the weather.

I've had very few insults, to be fair. My mother in law once said in public that she thought I was wearing a hair piece, but that's just her.

Rise above it. People who insult are generally jealous because we have great hair, or think they are being clever and don't realise they are being stupid, or ignorant and have no idea how to interact with people, or haven't the intelligence to think of anything else to say.
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Last edited by janeyliz; 05-30-2008 at 01:36 AM. Reason: spelling hiccy
I agree that these type of insults often arise out of jealousy. Honestly, it probably has very little to do with your hair, if it weren't the hair they would find something else to insult. That's just the way some people are.

You might try saying "It is very sad that you have to put me down just to make yourself feel better." Or just try thinking that to yourself....

It also helps me to think of where people are coming from, the whole walk a mile in their shoes kinda thing. sometimes understanding why people act the way they do helps to tolerate them better.
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What about a very nice smile and "Thank you very much for your opinion even though it wasn't requested."

One of my pet peeves of all time is people who offer their opinion of anything without being asked; whether it be hair; the way you raise your kids; your clothes, make-up whatever............my biggest peeves ever!!!

That being said - My mother had another of her famous motherisms "Kill them with kindess" which is harder to do than she said it would be
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When I get to be 'Queen of the World', I will absolish WIND!!!
People that are enough of a jerk to dog other people's hairdo generally don't merit a reply. Choose your battles for something that actually makes a difference.
Say, "Excuse me?" in a really nasty tone and walk away. You get your point across without being mean or rude, remain classy, and if they have even a modicum of a soul, they'll feel bad (no one likes being picked on).
- Seek first to understand, then to be understood.
- Character is how you treat those who can do nothing for you.
I would just reply with.. "Aw. I'm so sorry you have to straighten your hair!"

;p
I think being passive aggressive usually can work....especially on teenagers. But you can also simply state "I like my hair the way it is". Makes a point and it's not like they're getting you down or forcing yourself to stoop to their level.
2b/c, medium/high porosity, medium/coarse texture
Current HG: Kinky Curly errythang, GVPCB, LALSG

"I will never be the woman with perfect hair, who can wear white and not spill on it."

In the UK the fashion is for hair straightened to within an inch of its life. Someone at work with artificially poker-straight hair said 'Oooo, curls' to me in a sarcastic voice.

I smiled sweetly and said yes, isn't lovely to have the confidence to wear my hair as I want to, as nature intended, and not have to follow fashion like the rest of the sheep.

She couldn't think of a reply and just looked at me

I then went for the kill and said that I have such a full and busy life - family, career, social life, retail therapy, voluntary work - I simply don't have time to spare to straighten - you must have PLENTY of time.........

She just looked at me again and started talking about the weather.

I've had very few insults, to be fair. My mother in law once said in public that she thought I was wearing a hair piece, but that's just her.

Rise above it. People who insult are generally jealous because we have great hair, or think they are being clever and don't realise they are being stupid, or ignorant and have no idea how to interact with people, or haven't the intelligence to think of anything else to say.
Originally Posted by janeyliz
I think these are the BEST replies...I'll have to try them out.

VioletCurls, maybe you should come back with something about their SPLIT ENDS from drying it so much. HA!!! LIke. "It may be curly, but at least I don't have split ends." Doesn't sound like much, but guaranteed they'll start looking at their hair.
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Eh, I usually just give them the look of death. Scares them every time.

On the good days when I'm feeling magnanimous, I just smile and say "Too bad. I have the guts to break away from the herd. I mean, I would hate to be like sheep or cows and just go with whatever the herd does."

Now, be careful because I just about had a nervous breakdown on here when I though someone was calling me a cow or pig. But for the most part, if they're insulting your hair, I think it's fair game.

I posted in another thread about one of my comments (but I'm a smarta$$, so I don't usually care when I make these comments), I usually reply with "I'm sorry that I have great hair and a great rack, but God loves me...I would hate to disappoint him by going against what he gave me." Okay, the last part was added recently, but hey...I think it makes it better and less snide. If I'm in the company of someone who would get super offended by the rack comment, I substitute for smile, eyes, skin, personality, etc. Works most of the time.
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violetcurls's Avatar
Join Date: May 2008
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Wow, thanks guys. I absolutely love some of these! Gets the point across without sinking to their level. I like it!

Oh, and hopetocurl, I can't really say that because I do have a few split ends!

Thanks for all of your answers!
3a/b ?

Unleash the curls!

Nobody move! I dropped me brain. ~Jack Sparrow
What are the best comebacks for when someone insults your hair? Traditionally, if someone insults me I normally get pretty angry/mad (though I end up doing nothing except glare at the person for who knows how long, maybe). I've also found that if I have something to say already, I normally won't say anything stupid that will cause even more problems. And the comment doesn't bug me as much. So I'm wondering if there are any things I can say to defend myself without being totally mean or rude. .
Originally Posted by violetcurls

why are you worried about being mean or rude to somebody who is being mean and rude to you? I say give as good as you get! Talk about their ugly shoes, or their big fat butt. Tell them to dig the Spam out between their teeth before spewing their garbage at you. Give them the finger! LOL...
when all else fails...eat
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violetcurls's Avatar
Join Date: May 2008
Posts: 434
What are the best comebacks for when someone insults your hair? Traditionally, if someone insults me I normally get pretty angry/mad (though I end up doing nothing except glare at the person for who knows how long, maybe). I've also found that if I have something to say already, I normally won't say anything stupid that will cause even more problems. And the comment doesn't bug me as much. So I'm wondering if there are any things I can say to defend myself without being totally mean or rude. .
Originally Posted by violetcurls

why are you worried about being mean or rude to somebody who is being mean and rude to you? I say give as good as you get! Talk about their ugly shoes, or their big fat butt. Tell them to dig the Spam out between their teeth before spewing their garbage at you. Give them the finger! LOL...
Originally Posted by BugEyeZ
Because I don't want to be the same as them. No need to lower myself just because the have no sense of when they're being horribly rude. I think it's good to find different ways to deal with things. If I want them to stop making comments about my hair, why on earth should I start making comments about them? You don't throw more fire on the blaze to put it out. And I believe to do unto others as you'd want them to do to you.
3a/b ?

Unleash the curls!

Nobody move! I dropped me brain. ~Jack Sparrow

Last edited by violetcurls; 05-31-2008 at 06:24 PM.
"I'm sorry that I have great hair and a great rack, but God loves me...I would hate to disappoint him by going against what he gave me."
Originally Posted by SunshineGrrl
Lol I am so using that one in the future.

When people tell me to straiten my hair I usually tell them that if they want my hair fried strait so bad they need to do it themselves, because I have better things to do than waist two-three hours on my hair and have it destroyed by the humidity. I said this to one girl and she showed up at school the next day with a flat iron and when she went to straiten my hair she didn't even do it right. Then she proceeded to inform me that her hair was natruly strait, witch makes me wonder what she even needs a flat iron for anyway.

I will never understand fake barbies...

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