Our Gray Journey Diary

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Banjo, that is a fanTAStic picture of you and your friend! Your hair is looking more and more awesome with every photo you post!
Sulfate/non-water-soluble silicone free since 8/16/10
Northern VA
Med-coarse, normal porosity, low elasticity
Dye-free since 11/2010

thank you all for the nice comments. after 14 months i feel like i am past the tough part of the transition which was never really so bad and enjoying the lighter color hair. my friend's hair is really amazing, much thicker than mine and she has never colored it so it is totally natural. it is amazing how many different types and varieties of gray exist. mine is kindof multi and tho i admire the gorgeous silver and white of some (like RBB--your hair is AMAZING) i dont know how good it would look on me. the real test will be winter when i get paler. since i dont wear makeup i hope it wont make me look too washed out. we'll see...i really admire all of you "mature" curlies and feel very connected in this forum.
Susan suburban NY
3b going gray, not thick, waist length when wet, a bit below shoulders when dry
CG since 11/11/04
http://public.fotki.com/banjolady/
PW: banjo
HG: suave and honey for co-wash, deva, i use garnier fructis regular CO's or boots pink or white as leave ins and LA looks sport gel. plop w microfiber turban, then curl towel scrunch, then another turban.i sleep with the turban on. little one minute hair styling videos http://www.youtube.com/user/lazycurls
banjocurl, thanks! i also like your hair, it is coming in nicely. and you know it will change over time. i wish i had stopped coloring sooner, or never colored, so i could have had my hair different shades of salt and pepper. but i am glad i finally did stop.
it is true that we adjust some things with our hair color. one thing i can no longer do for sure is wear a white top!! hahaha!! you can imagine!! and on goinggraylookinggreat (or in her book, i forget) she recommends that we forget white and very light colors.
on the other hand, i think our natural color looks better with our skin than hair that is colored. just my opinion, i know others disagree. i noticed this once looking at a group of women, all same age, standing around and how one of the 5 looked so much better,younger, and it leaped out at me how their colored hair looked wrong against their skin, and hers was natural (no one was gray at that point.) and i continue to notice it now. so i think you will look great in winter, too.
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3a, some 2c & 3b, medium texture, porosity normal, low elasticity
washing/cowashing, conditioning, protein tx: curl junkie products
leave in:cj conditioners and treatments as leave in
styling: cj pattern pusha, cj honey butta leave in, cj cccc, cj ciab, lalsg. cj aloe fix gel is my high dews/summer HG!!
sealants - spiral solutions emollience butter, jane carter nourish & shine
one of my hiker friends who let her gray come in has dyed it back after 2 years. she says it makes her look like an old witch. after all that growing her hair out now she is brown again. not me. i still have lots of brown in my hair tho and she was almost white...i guess its not for everyone...
Susan suburban NY
3b going gray, not thick, waist length when wet, a bit below shoulders when dry
CG since 11/11/04
http://public.fotki.com/banjolady/
PW: banjo
HG: suave and honey for co-wash, deva, i use garnier fructis regular CO's or boots pink or white as leave ins and LA looks sport gel. plop w microfiber turban, then curl towel scrunch, then another turban.i sleep with the turban on. little one minute hair styling videos http://www.youtube.com/user/lazycurls
i think for gray/white/silver hair to look good it has to be in good condition -- dry hair is the worst and can give that 'witch' look.
i also think it's important to have a length, style that works for you & your hair.
i like to think that if i ever reached that point, before i re colored my hair i'd get a totally different style to see if that made a difference. i really hated the way i looked with my hair dyed and would not willingly go through that transition phase again.
i guess for your friend she was pretty happy with her hair dyed. i have a friend who let her gray come in about 3 years ago. however, she has light brown hair and she wears it short. so she periodically gets highlights, then lets them grow out (takes about 2 seconds, lol!), has gray. her hair is so light that it is difficult to tell. i think for people with dark hair like me to color again after transitioning out would take a lot!
your friend must have been very unhappy with her hair gray. as you said, it's not for everyone.
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3a, some 2c & 3b, medium texture, porosity normal, low elasticity
washing/cowashing, conditioning, protein tx: curl junkie products
leave in:cj conditioners and treatments as leave in
styling: cj pattern pusha, cj honey butta leave in, cj cccc, cj ciab, lalsg. cj aloe fix gel is my high dews/summer HG!!
sealants - spiral solutions emollience butter, jane carter nourish & shine
SparklyCurls's Avatar
Join Date: Sep 2010
Posts: 163
I find conditioned gray hair with an updated cut can be happily rocked by anyone BUT it also does take an assured attitude to go with it.

You all here are prime example of doing just that.

Last edited by SparklyCurls; 09-09-2011 at 07:51 PM.
here is my 2 (and more) tone hair!
Attached Thumbnails
Our Gray Journey Diary-092411susan2tonehairsmall.jpg  
Susan suburban NY
3b going gray, not thick, waist length when wet, a bit below shoulders when dry
CG since 11/11/04
http://public.fotki.com/banjolady/
PW: banjo
HG: suave and honey for co-wash, deva, i use garnier fructis regular CO's or boots pink or white as leave ins and LA looks sport gel. plop w microfiber turban, then curl towel scrunch, then another turban.i sleep with the turban on. little one minute hair styling videos http://www.youtube.com/user/lazycurls
It's like an amazing technicolor dreamcoat! : )
I love it.
In Western PA
Found NC in 2004. CG since 2-05, going grey since 9-05. 3B with some 3A.
Hair texture-medium/fine, porosity-normal except for the ends which are porous, elasticity-normal.
Suave & VO5 cond, LA Looks Sport Gel, oils, honey, vinegar.
http://public.fotki.com/jeepcurlygurl/ password jeepy **updated Aug 2014**
https://www.facebook.com/lifetheuniverseandtodd
SparklyCurls's Avatar
Join Date: Sep 2010
Posts: 163
@BANJOCURL - your calico cat hair tone is just as beautiful as the change of leave colors during fall.



Banjo, you will love it once the old color is finally gone! Your gray is so beautiful and flattering. It took me two years to grow my old color all out, but it was well worth the wait!
2C wavy with some spirals. CG since April 07. Medium texture and porosity.
COs: Yes to Cucumbers
Stylers: Krystal Ecostyler, KCCC,


Unique and Useful gifts & accessories
www.EweniqueEssentials.artfire.com and www.EweniqueEssentials.etsy.com
thanks so much! i need to feel good about my hair now because my face is not making me happy. i know it is only temporary. had a great haircut wed with ana of devachan-she is awesome. she said my hair was very healthy and she really liked the color(s). they even have ipads there for us to use while drying!! the carac (effudex) cream is making me quite blotchy. well,at almost 62 i am grateful that i can hike and swim and play music and have fun, despite being overweight and now having a blotchy face. i have friends who color and were very disapproving of my decision to grow out the gray but now they are saying they like it--on me--it would NEVER be right for them...
Susan suburban NY
3b going gray, not thick, waist length when wet, a bit below shoulders when dry
CG since 11/11/04
http://public.fotki.com/banjolady/
PW: banjo
HG: suave and honey for co-wash, deva, i use garnier fructis regular CO's or boots pink or white as leave ins and LA looks sport gel. plop w microfiber turban, then curl towel scrunch, then another turban.i sleep with the turban on. little one minute hair styling videos http://www.youtube.com/user/lazycurls

Last edited by banjocurl; 10-06-2011 at 11:18 PM. Reason: forgot something
SparklyCurls's Avatar
Join Date: Sep 2010
Posts: 163
A good trim and revamped shaping is always priceless. I go for another cut in a few weeks and thinking I now really want a big change as my old color is completely gone and my gray is fully grown in I want it to show in the best way possible.

@BANJO - I read on the salon review board that you just cut off 4 inches it must look even more amazing now. Are you planning to post a current picture of it?

Hi banjo - pix please of your new haircut! You're doing great with your grey transition and your hair looks healthy, even though it looked healthy before too. You were very brave transitioning with keeping your hair long. Even with my shoulder-length hair I don't think I'd have the patience to do that LOL! Best of luck with your skin treatment with that cream - hang in there if you can!
Today I am mad at me.

Last Saturday, I had a lovely hair appt with my stylist, whom I adore but... I really wish I hadn't colored my hair again. I know that if I want to transition, I have to STOP coloring. I have naturally dark brown hair and for years, I've had a nice base color and highlights added. Really, my hair looks nice, great curls, yada yada.

But I am just SO tired of spending the money, so tired of the chemicals. I KNOW this isn't good for me. Problem is, when my roots come in gray, the line of demarcation is so obvious against my darker hair. This last time, we lightened my base color about two shades, and added more highlights around the crown of my head so the grays will "blend" better. But I know well enough that while it looks good now, I have to MAINTAIN it, again.

I feel like I need a buddy, someone to encourage me when I get self conscious and nervous about how the world perceives me.

So now I am venting about my own weakness and ego, while admiring the beautiful grays on my curly friends.


I was born to be a pessimist. My blood type is B Negative.
SparklyCurls's Avatar
Join Date: Sep 2010
Posts: 163
It’s easier if you never colored your hair but I think that’s not the case with most of us.

In the first transition stage, I remember people looking at me and I could see on their face that they were thinking of a way to tell me it’s time to color my roots as if I didn’t realize it. And I did in fact have people tell me not to let my gray grown in but now that it’s fully grown in and they’ve gotten use to it - I don’t hear those negative comments anymore.

All my colored hair is completely cut off and I have gray streaks from my roots to the very tips of my curls and I now get asked where I get my highlights … Mother Nature provides phenomenal freebies – we just have to be accepting of them!
curlygoinggray likes this.


Last edited by SparklyCurls; 10-11-2011 at 08:53 AM.
roseannadanna - Obviously the fastest way to transition is to cut your hair very short. That's what I did about 6 years ago. At the time I didn't have a lot of gray, but the hightlights were turning so brassy that I couldn't stand it any more. I have a cool complexion and brassy hair was awful with it. Fortunately for me, a pixie is a hairstyle that I wore off and on for decades, so it wasn't particularly traumatic or drastic for me. It took about 2 months to grow out all of the artificial color and I haven't looked back. I am now probably close to 50% gray. I'm glad I cut my hair short to get rid of the artificial color quickly - I don't have the patience to deal with a lengthy (pun intended!) transition. I know that option isn't appropriate for everyone, but might be something to consider. Best of luck!
2Poodles Southeast PA
fine, med porosity, normal elasticity
Currently using the following 2 - 3 x/week:
Living Proof Perfect Hair Day suphate-free Poo, cone-free CO and styling treatment, plus KCCC

apparently goinggraylookinggreat is going off online the end of this week as a website, she said she can no longer afford to keep it. she will have something small that is about her book, but not a website that is as in depth as this one is. was not a cg, but very helpful about gray hair. seeing those women in transition and reading so many tips was a great help to me when i transitioned from color.
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3a, some 2c & 3b, medium texture, porosity normal, low elasticity
washing/cowashing, conditioning, protein tx: curl junkie products
leave in:cj conditioners and treatments as leave in
styling: cj pattern pusha, cj honey butta leave in, cj cccc, cj ciab, lalsg. cj aloe fix gel is my high dews/summer HG!!
sealants - spiral solutions emollience butter, jane carter nourish & shine
Oh that makes me sad. That was a wonderful website and very helpful and motivating. Her book really helped me decide to let my grey come in naturally and not dye it.
In Western PA
Found NC in 2004. CG since 2-05, going grey since 9-05. 3B with some 3A.
Hair texture-medium/fine, porosity-normal except for the ends which are porous, elasticity-normal.
Suave & VO5 cond, LA Looks Sport Gel, oils, honey, vinegar.
http://public.fotki.com/jeepcurlygurl/ password jeepy **updated Aug 2014**
https://www.facebook.com/lifetheuniverseandtodd
Okay, I just read most of this topic--though not all of it, as I have a pinched nerve in my elbow that doesn't like me if I scroll too much--and I just want to say Thank Whatever it's not just me!!! My sister-in-law keeps telling me to dye my hair and that I'm too young for the amount of gray I have. Too bloody bad. (I have an English husband, so I can say that.) After seeing some of your pics, I'm even wondering if I can go long and gray! Unfortunately I have a small face and glasses, and my hair gets REALLY big, so I may not be able to pull it off. But it's amazing to know there are some of you who can!! (grin)
The site that used to be goinggraylookinggreat (or whatever) is now The Silver Sister's Cafe Gray. I found it thru facebook and joined last April 2012.

I am still learning my way here at naturallycurly. I just read this entire thread and hope it will continue as I have been going gray since January of this year... If I should be following another thread, please let me know.

Most of the dye is cut off and my hair is way shorter than my liking. My bangs are 4" and layered throughout, going longer down to my neck. I have only been practicing cg/nat.curly methods since July of this year. My hair has not been this short since high school (29 yrs)!!! The pics on my sig/avatar are before I did my LAST trim/cut.

I want to find a headband like the one "rustina" had in her pic on this thread, page 11 post #218 "rbb" called it a satin covered plastic headband. It appeared to have teeth (in 2nd pic) as to separate the hair. I think it is the type I am looking for to pull my short bangs/sides back during this grow out period. Any links to this type of headband would be appreciated. I have looked all over the web.

What are you currently using for yellowing (I haven't had that yet)? I do a once per month baking soda/water followed by WHITE vinegar/water rinse to brighten/clarify. Is the soda wrong to use for naturally curly girls? Is once a month too damaging??? I don't do ACV because I have heard it can stain grays. Is white vinegar wrong for naturally curly girls???

I know rbb and jeepcurlygurl told me about the red/gold corrector in another thread. I see the discussion was here and I am still unsure about it...

Thank you for this thread. I enjoyed hearing the transitions and it really helps to know what lies ahead.

Well, I'm 8 months going gray and I have a LONG road ahead of me!!! Keep me on the gray/curly path...

Mostly: Wen Cleansing Conditioner: Lavendar & Tea Tree

Occasionally: DevaCurl No-Poo, One Condition, & Angel; KCCC, KCKT & KCCC
Last Dye 1/4/12; Started Curlygirl Method 6/2012; Final cut to remove dye 3/30/13

Last edited by curlygoinggray; 09-07-2012 at 11:36 AM.

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