Curls&Quirks

I get the "what are you?" a lot. I have had a few people ask if I'm black or say something like "you must have some black in you with that hair." It used to bother me when I was younger because I always tried to straighten my hair and I hated that people could tell it wasn't naturally straight. I remember this one time in high school, I had just gotten my hair done and my cheerleading coach who was black goes "Girl, you have some black girl hair, that's how my hair looks when its straight." It was funny at the time cuz then all the girls started joking about thats why I get all the steps so quick lol. But back to the point. I'm Puerto Rican, Italian, and Cuban and while I dont get offended by someone asking if I'm mixed or of I'm part black because of my hair, it does bother that they assume that the only way my hair could be this way is if I'm mixed. Thats when I just let them know that most of the world has curly hair but that everyone straightens it so you can't tell. Just the mentality that a certain race = certain type of hair, or certain type of anything actually, bothers me. But thats beside the point. The only time I get upset if someone asks me this is when they are obviously asking in a derogatory way. Then I'm quick to shut them up with a "and if I am? You got a problem?" lol

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Trying CG for the 2nd time. Been going strong since Feb 2010. Wish me luck!


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anonymous_46846

I get the same question. When I say I am from Spain people are like "ahhh, like Antonio Banderas". We are lucky that we have such a gentleman representing us in Hollywood.

ILovejuiceboxes

I get that a lot. I am. My mom is African American and my dad is Caucasian. People tell me I have "a black face with white skin", which makes no sense to me. I have my moms curly hair, but it's curly and fine and grows down, opposed to her beautiful hair that's all nice and tightly curled and black and just... I love it.
But people see me and they automatically ask me if I'm mixed. I'm not offended, but kinda confused. I didn't know it was obvious.

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My hair is stubborn. What I thought would help me only resulted in horrible, damaged hair. Straightening my hair is now the only reasonable thing I can do. So, I am no longer CG. Not until my hair gets fixed.
Goal- Long, shiny locks! Currently shoulder length when curly. Goal is to reach around right below chest area. Wish me luck!

Butterfly_Curlz

LOL! That was too funny! & ur rt...people like that generally are trolls or even monsters as I like to call them...either way they generally resemble that pic to the T! That type of stupidity reminds me of this chick at my job... (you know those real jealous chicks who smile in ur face & then talk SHHH) well anyway I had gone to a employee football game and I took my son w/me. Everyone was talking about how cute he was. So anyway the next week at work I'm n the bathroom and this chick is in the stall next to me after everyone else leaves & she says out the blue "ah...I am sooooo happy that I don't have any children...I just don't know what I would do if I had a child! God thank you so much that I don't have a child!"

First of all WTF! 1) no one was talking to you, about you or about children so clearly while you were speaking out loud u meant that comment for me bc I was the only one there. So I waited until she came out the stall & I said excuse me...do you have something u wanna say!

Of course she was like what r u talking ab?...Come on now...don't play dumb now bc I'm confronting u ab it! I was like what woman in her rt mind thanks God that you don't have children?! Not saying that everyone wants a child but no one is thankful that they don't! I said ur the kinda chick who can't keep a man so u can't get anyone who wants to knock ur a*s up or would admit that they did! So the next time u are feeling down on yourself keep my business the F out of ur mouth!

She said nothing & just left the bathroom! U try to be nice to people but some people don't deserve it! This chick was a straight hater who would always say like "ah...you always come up in here w/the cutest shoes & outfits on (well am I suppossed to come out especially to wk lookin a hot mess?)" or like when she saw me in the parking lot & said how are u only in ur 20's yet have a cadillac? I'm like girl please...its just a car to me but I didn't know it was such a big deal to you. Once again she said nothing & walked away...LOLto all the haters!

nomilknogluten

ohh, some of these posts just made my day. Is it horrible that reading other peoples' rants and bad experiences makes me feel a connection with them?

I don't consider asking someone if they are mixed to be offensive. However, I have been asked (by total strangers!) if I am Jewish. Talk about some serious awkwardness.

1. Judaism is a religion, not a race. I have known Jews from many different countries who looked nothing like each other.

2. I'm pretty sure the reason they asked me is because not only do I have dark wurly hair, I also have a huge nose.

now, THAT is some offensive shhh. And it's happened on more than one occasion.

StarryWithCurls

The "Are you mixed?" question doesn't bug me as much as the "What are you?" question. I can't stand that. It just comes off as rude and/or uneducated. I often want to answer, "Human."

EllyEllyOxenFree

I personally can't stand, "Are you half?" Half what? Am I creamer now? Non-dairy? Wtf?

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BC'ed: 26 Dec 09
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pprMACHEheart

I am biracial, but I like to give people are hard time when I get the question . . "What are you?" I simply respond with "I'm human."

I don`t understand how what I am affects you, my hair is my hair and that's the way it grows out of my scalp, sheesh!

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morrighu

Oddly enough, I am mixed. You'd have to dump the UN into a blender to get anyone who is more mixed...

Anyway, thanks to genetic lotto, I popped out with red hair and green eyes but no one ever asks....

LMAO!

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Morrignu

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KF<3

It's like asking a redheaded Buddhist that because they're buddhist, they're most definitely Chinese. No doubt about it.

I am on my Mothers side, Half white European (Spanish & Polish) and half African. My Dad is Lebanese/Syrian/ and dun dun dun ISRAELI. Yeah, most of the Jews I know in America and other places don't look anything like us here in the Middleast. It honestly kind of annoys me when I say my heritage to a religious Jew, and they believe they relate to me because I'm from Israel or are Hebrew (yeah you're blonde pale and blue eyed, sorry your not Semitic). Being a religion does not make you a race, and does not make you know the culture. Please do not believe you relate to me because you practice the religion of Israel. Man I sound kind of mean :/ I mean absolutely no offense to religious Jews, just the ones that believe they are ethnically Jewish.

And what's absolutely hilarious is that many people in Israel don't actually look Semitic either.

If someone looks Jew, they most likely look Middleastern or Mediterranean. And more then likley, they're probably not from Israel.

I get the where are you from to. I think I have a slight accent to, so that probably helps people in asking me. I usually get -

Italian/Greek/Spanish/Russian/and Jewish lol. I usually get a 'are you part African?' (even though I don't really look it, at all) because of my 3c hair. I also got a lot of you look Asian comments. Which is just weird.

I once got a 'you look like Lisa Bonnet' (who is African/Jewish? I can actually see her mom being from Israel) from a gay guy at a walmart counter. Kind of threw me off, because I don't think I look anything like her - but I was flattered ( I think she's pretty )

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Melecrystal

Well, I guess I have a real strange point on this one. My family runs anywhere from bone straight to as my father teasinly liked to put it "like you stuck your finger in a light socket!" I am deeply wavey, I guess. Never have been able to get my hair straight by any means.

My husband and I adopted 3 children. The oldest is gypsy and has hair so straight it is unbelievable. Can't be curled. The twins are mixed. Look white, completely, except for the girl twin's hair. Incrediably thick, soft, tiny ringlets in soft brown. People will look at her hair, my hair, older sister's hair, father's blue eyes, twin brother's soft easy ringlets and wonder what the heck kind of family we are. Since we all have "white skin" they just aren't sure. I refuse to "see" the confusion and wait to see if they are bold enough to ask. Then I start.

You see, I have a friend who is Danish. Tall, white blond, pale white, blue eyes, and from a long line of the same kind of people. She was in the process of becoming a Doctor and was going to specialize in genetics. She became engaged to a very wonderful Jewish man. Somewhere in her studies she was asked to participate in a genetics study for Tay Sachs disease. For those who have not heard of this, it is similar to sickle cell except that it appears in those of Jewish descent and is 100% fatal by 5 years old. It is a extremly painful and horrible death for a very young child. Many people have themselves tested for it and if they marry another carrier, they have each pregancy tested. My friend, as part of the testing process to be in the study, found that she carried for Tay Saches! Somewhere, back in time, someone Jewish was in this family of blonds! Which show you, NO ONE can guarantee their ancestery! My friend was so glad she found out because her husband was a carrier and they had never suspected that she was also. They could have had a very sad and painful experience.

My belief and the belief of many of the religions of our world is that we all came from one man and one woman. We are all related. We have more in common than we have in difference. I like or dislike someone based on the character of that person, not on what that person is physically. I find great amusement in quitely disrupting other people's prejudices. Usually by acting as though I don't really understand that they are really being that dumb, ugly, cruel, stupid, etc.

Nitemoon

My cousin was talking about how pretty my hair was, and asked me if I was part Jewish....

projectdanielle

Once in a while I get the "what are you?"

Most of the questions are about my daughter. I'm amazed to find out how many people think she's mixed. Most people assume her father is from Southern Asia. (Seriously, I get asked this a lot.) I don't think its about her hair but more about her coloring.

Funny thing is she looks just like me. Same caramel complexion, same curly hair.

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Danielle
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EllyEllyOxenFree

A guy asked me if I was "mixed at all" yesterday, and I always ask people why they ask, just to see how ignorant they are...his answer? "Well, you're of lighter tone..." Ummm, he's never seen a light skinned black person? Goooodbye.

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nana_banana

I get this ALL the time.

Sometimes people really don't believe me when I tell him I have no recent black ancestry. Especially black people, they act like I'm lying. Why would I lie?

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MJLove

I get asked this a lot, actually! Just yesterday, even. :P A lot of people think I'm part Latina, but only when my hair is curly, for some reason. I suppose it's also because of the area where I live - here in San Antonio, a lot of people have Mexican heritage in the mix!

I'm actually Polish, but as one of the people asked me put it, "Well, I asked because you don't look completely Anglo-Saxon-white-bread." Haha!

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curlyhoneyb

LMAO! Yes, ladies, I'm feeling you with this one!

If I had a quarter for every time somebody asked me this, I would be the next Donald Trump.

As it happens, yes, I am mixed. My skin is white...I'm talking the kind of skin that burns lobster red in the heat. But I do have African blood in my veins.

My hair is what gives it away. However, I've never understood people who feel the need to ask: "What are you?"

Like, WTF? Does my race or ethnicity determine what kind of person I am?

Another one is being told that I'm "exotic". Ugh. Seriously, I do NOT want to be defined by other people.

I don't like labels or stereotypes. To the OP...if people think you're mixed, that's not necessarily a bad thing. There are lots of mixed people who look like you do. Maybe there's a little sumthin in your family tree that you're unaware of.

annabananalise

I get asked this a lot, and I'm not mixed. It's because of my hair, skin and maybe the way I speak ( I get the oreo label a lot). My parents are black--I'm light skinned probably because my mom is. I have some Irish and Cherokee mixed in from a long time ago but most blacks in America have a little mix of everything somewhere down the line.

Lately I've started coming up with ridiculously impossible combinations. Conversations usually go like this:

Guy: "Say guh, you mixed?"
Me: "Why yes, I'm Japanese and Russian."

It's scary when they actually believe me.

thelio

i have been asked if i was mixed, which I am. this doesn't bother me. what does bother me, is when some one ask, "what are you?"

Do i look like an alien life form or something?? What does that mean? When children ask, they are forgiven, but when an adult ask, I look at them as if they had 2 heads.

BekkaPoo

lmao.. I can totally see that happening. In a way it's kind of a shame to waste all that good sarcasm on someone that dumb.. doh.

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