hurtful comments people've made about your hair

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I am a teacher and I started the school year off by wearing my type 3c/4a curly as not to alarm the children! I have been flat ironing my hair and I usually start the school year with straight hair. As time goes on, I switch up by wearing my curly hair and the kids all respond in surprise by asking what happened to my hair!
I will never forget the time my mother took me to the mall to trim my hair. It was the first and only time she did that. After they washed my hair they tried to comb it. They literally had 3 girls trying to comb my hair. They were all saying really mean things about my hair. They kept telling me that I needed to take care of my hair and that I needed to learn how to comb my hair, but this was went I went thru everyday. My hair was just that curly and dry. I was so upset that I was crying thru the whole thing and they just kept being really rude to me. I was only 9 years old and I will never forget it! They just don't understand what curly hair is like.
I had used a straightening iron to make my hair look more wavy than curly, so it looked more straight than curly. I was with my friends at school and one of my friends said to me "Oh, I love your hair now. I never liked it, but it lookes so great now!" Ugh. That one hurt. Also at school once one of my guy friends stuck a pencil in my hair and said it wouldn't come out. I pulled it out easy and threw it across the room

Last edited by smo6767; 09-26-2008 at 05:22 PM. Reason: Stuck stuck? stuck stuck. stuck! stuck???
I've found that the worst comments about my hair have been made by myself. Now that I have accepted my curly self, I don't that anymore. Generally, everyone comments on how beautiful my hair is.
3a/b, auburn haired, BIG, coarse and frizz prone.

My hair hates:
Curl Keeper
Anything with lots of protein
AOHR

Things that work:
Aveda Flaxseed and Aloe Gel
Aveda Phomollient
BRHG!
Giovanni 50/50 Balanced Condish
KCCC and KCKT (Found my HG combo!)
DevaCurl Angell
LOOB
L'Oreal Melting Gel



Password: rizos


http://public.fotki.com/titiancurl/
Ok, so my story isn't as bad as a lot of the ones posted, but the worst thing I have had said about my hair happened when I went to this beauty store to buy some conditioner. The sales lady came up to me to ask if I needed help, and I told her I needed a leave in and she was like this product works well for "ethnic" hair like mine. I was really insulted because I have never ever been told I have ethnic hair in my life, in fact I have seen a lot of "non-ethnic" hair that is curlier than my fine 3B curls. She obviously needs to be educated on what curly hair is and that it is not "ethnic"

To top it off, my sister went to the same store ( which happened to have a salon) and the stylists kept saying her hair is "so nappy" even though it is probably 3C.

Lets just say neither of us will ever go back to this store in the future.
That's terrible! That lady is implying there's something WRONG with "ethnic" hair. Although, I understand that even if it's not bad, being called something you're not is still annoying.
3b/c, CG 9/18/08
Last process: 04/05/08 Big Chop: 08/08/09
Currently: Herbal Essences Hello Hydration, Herbal Essences Set Me Up gel (summer only), Boots Curl Creme (winter only)
Geeze those are horrible! See, I mostly get compliments on how pretty or curly or beautiful my hair is (the one in my pic is like, 2nd or 3rd day hair, so it's mostly wavy). But I have 2 or 3 "friends" that don't like it. My DAD like, thinks I should "brush it to make it straight" and I'm all "NO IT'LL GET FRIZZY BACK OFF."

But yeah, my hairdresser LOVES it.

My "friends":
I was commenting on how soft her hair was, and my other friend was all
"Well if you straightened yours it would be that soft, too."
And then I said "You should really stop flat ironing it, you have such pretty hair."

Her: "Well no I like it straight and I like yours better straight."

Me: "Well I don't want mine to get all frizzy like yours is."

OWNED! She got maaadddd. And defensive AND that next week she went a day without straightening it. You could tell it made her self concious. I was all "kaaarrrmmma!"

LOL sorry I'm mean but its true, her's is hella frizzy from flat ironing it.


from my little sister, i have gotten that i should have stayed in the 80's... from straight haired girls, i get the usual, "you with the biggest hair award!"... my grandma insists that i straighten it because i look to hispanic or greek with my curls... which hurts, bc i'm latina and adopted into a german family, so i already stand out... guess which one i am:



but my boyfriend recently told me what originally attracted him to me...


the fact that i "always have sex hair"... i've talked to my other guy friends and they say its true... most guys will more than likely flock to a girl who looks like she had a "long night"...
Originally Posted by imjustacurl

Dear GOD you are GORGEOUS!
*MAJOR jeaousy*
And I LOOOOOOVE your hair!


My hair grew in curly when I was around 12 and I didn't know how to style it. One time, this girl that was always a ***** to me said "Marlene, did you get in a fight with your hair dryer this morning?" I had been homeschooled the year before to try it out so I was quite socially akward to boot and didn't know how to respond. Now I'm 18 and I still remember it. I also got the CONSTANT question "Have you ever straightened your hair? You should straighten your hair." I HATED my hair.
So the following years there was lots of pony tails, braids, and buns, and a few failed attempts at straightening it with a ****ty conair flat iron. I've gotten to be a pro in the past year tho, now that I have a job and money to buy the good hair stuff. I still miss the convenience of straight hair...I always have to wash the curls if I want to wear it down and look sexy

I still remember one time my grandmother was calling it "kinky" and my grandpa was like "Wait a minute, it's curly not kinky!" hahaha he is the best.
CG since Jan 2009. Hair: 3b, fine
LeaveIn/ Conditioners: Alaffia, AOHR
Gel - KCCC, FSG, LA Looks, HETT
Protein: IAGirl's Recipe and AOGPB. DT: Honey+Coconut Oil Aloe Vera Gel/ Mineral Oil/ Alcohols: Don't work well.
My mom (who has straighter hair than me) used to get on my case about straightening my hair. At first, I got insecure, but then I talked back saying, "Do you want me to become taller and blue eyed as well? Yes, I have curly hair, I'm always going to have curly hair, get used to it." She has stopped bothering me.
elementary school : kids where hiding things in my bushy hair and called me "treasure house"

13 years old: My mum took me to a hairdresser to manage my wild hair. She looked at it and said "I can't do anything with that hair". After this I was like -->

18 years old : An X asked me to flat iron my hair. I never did

20 years old : a classmate called my hair "bee house". Anyway, she permed her hair curly some months later.

20,5 years old : a hairdresser called my hair "thing".

21 years old : a hairdresser wanted to straighten my hair, and I told her no. And when she asked me why, I answered " I like what I have". She started laughing

Anyway,who cares?
I feel beautiful with my ugly hair, is there a problem with that, curl-haters? HA!

My only complain is that I have not found a nice hairdresser with knowledge on curly hair. Until now, they have all sucked.
I have had everything from "what'd you do, stick your finger in a light socket?" to "Pippi Longstocking" to "L'il Orphan Annie" but I pretty much grew up with comments like that. The ones that really hurt the most were the ones that insinuated that I would have pretty hair if I did something with it or took some time with it - like I haven't tried my whole life???? I also get the "ethnic" hair comment a lot, mostly by hairdressers that are surprised that I am white and redheaded but "have ethnic hair." It's been about 10 years since I've been to the salon. NONE of them know what they're doing when it comes to curly hair (well...none that I've evver met.)

The one that hurt the most and has stayed with me was from a co-worker. She had just gotten her hair cut and it looked really good - still long and silky and beautiful with a little body and a lot of bounce. I told her how great it looked and that I wish I could get mine to do that and she looked at me and said "thanks - if I had hair like yours, I would shave my head."
Okay, this has happened before when I was a kid, but not for years. Tonight I went to the grocery store and a group of teens BARKED at me! (Because of my "poodle hair," I guess.)

=(

Last edited by irishlass1029; 11-18-2008 at 11:41 PM. Reason: typo
The photo on my current drivers license is 4-5 years old and my hair is very short and curly. It is really embarrassing to show it to people because they always make rude comments. 'Whoa, you had a fro!' or 'You look like an old lady with that hair.' and so many others. Now my hair is to the middle of my back but then it was up to my ears. I HATE when ignorant people say I had a fro. My hair is 2c/3a, that is not a fro. Just because it was short it curled up tighter!

I also cannot stand when i flat iron my hair and people say, 'Oh wow this looks SO MUCH BETTER!', or 'You should do it this way more often, it looks a lot nicer on you.' Apparently they believe those are compliments! Sometimes I want to slap them and say, I like my curls and KNOW that I am beautiful both ways. I don't need any hair advice from you, someone who can't even begin to know what they are talking about!

I have heard so many terrible comments on my hair, it made me really insecure about it for a while. All I wanted in middle/high school was to be 'normal' and have straight hair like all the other girls. None of the guys were attracted to me because I didn't have that cookie cutter cheerleader look. It was tough because there was nothing I could do to get that look. (This was before flat irons were really popular.) Kids can be the most cruel of all.

Fro, bush, brillo pad, poof, frizzy.... all those mean names, and the list could go on and on. I have heard that I belong in the 80's or that I look like I stuck my finger in a light socket. I have had people offer to straighten my hair, 'So it looks better.' I have been compared to poodles and Little Orphan Annie. And sorry, but I DO NOT like being called Shirley Temple. What girl wants to be compared to a child actress when they are trying so hard to be taken seriously and feel attractive?

Lucky for me, my hair is longer and I love it now. It does have some evil days on occasion, but I have learned to accept it. I like being unique and have a lot of confidence. My boyfriend loves my curls (and prefers them to my flat ironed hair.) I know just how to manage my hair and have no problem telling a hair stylist that they don't know my hair as well as I do. (Why do they feel like, when I go in for a trim, they need to 'fix' my hair??) And after all those years of teasing and names, I have a LOT of good comebacks for the haters.
Thick, dyed dark brown, 2c/3a in long layers to mid back

Shampoo:
Suave Sleek

Conditioner:
Organics Hair Mayonnaise or Suave Sleek

Leave in:
Herbal Esscenses None of Your Frizzness leave in creme
Luster's Pink Original hair lotion
Smooth 'N Shine Hair polisher

Last edited by macXgrrl; 11-28-2008 at 11:34 PM.
My mom (who has straighter hair than me) used to get on my case about straightening my hair. At first, I got insecure, but then I talked back saying, "Do you want me to become taller and blue eyed as well? Yes, I have curly hair, I'm always going to have curly hair, get used to it." She has stopped bothering me.
Originally Posted by s.s.blackorchid
Great response!
That's right, I said it! I wear scrunchies!!

I am a sulfate washing, cone slabbing, curly lovin' s.o.b. The CG police haven't caught me yet.


3a/3b
Ok, I have read many of the stories on this thread. I am very sorry that so many of you had to go through the cruel comments of others. However, I am feeling right at home. It is difficult for me to write about this, but I do go back to some really cruel things kids said to me in school. This all started in Jr. High when my hair became curly. My hair was also stick straight and silky and shiny until age 10. When I turned ten years old, everything went downhill.

Classmates in elementary school came to Jr. High and would say to me, "What happened? Your hair never used to look like that?"

Kids would put their fingers in my hair and say "I'm stuck, I'm stuck."

I would be called "Medusa."

In the eighth grade I got a spiral curl perm. People told me that my hair "looked better." I have had a doctor say to me, "your hair looks so much better than the way you used to have it." As if an eighth grader had control over how their hair "used to look."

To this day, people ask "Do you condition?"

I went through a period after high school where I had pretty good control of my hair. I feel that I owe a lot of it to Wella Kolesteral. I also grew my hair long and dyed it blonde. People started to tell me how much they liked my hair and asked if I went to beauty school to have it done.

At my twentieth high school reunion, a lot of girls came up to me and told me that I looked beautiful. I have never felt so good in my life. These were some of the same people who made fun of me in school. One girl came up to me and said, "A lot of people are saying that you should be voted most changed." While, that is flattering in one way, it made me think of how awful I must of looked in the past. For a good part of my Jr. High and high school years, I was constantly told how ugly I was. I do not at all consider myself stunning, but I sure have improved with all of the great hair products we have now. One of my favorites - olive oil.

Thank you for letting me vent.

Last edited by Noelle1966; 11-29-2008 at 07:13 PM.
I forgot about the barking thing. That was painful, too. I feel that it was insinuating that I was a dog.
My worst comments were about the hair I had in junior high. When I was in elementary school, my mom used to either smooth my hair (using ponytails and buns when it was wet) or she crimped it with a crimping iron. When I hit junior high, I tried to embrace my natural texture, but I knew nothing about it. So I had this mega frizzy shapeless style. No curls, just a frizzy mess. One of my friends used to say my hair looked like a brillo pad. Other friends used to try and be "helpful" by telling me how I could fix my hair to look nice. It always made me feel really bad.

Then in college, when I was into the heavy flat ironing, I ran into a guy I knew in high school. He was one of my close friend's older brothers. He said, "Wow you look great now! Remember when you used to hang out at my house all the time, and you had the really bad hair?"
3A curls, fine texture, thin (it's always been that way). A few inches past shoulder length and would like it to grow very long.

Latest routine:
Sulfate-free shampoo: Jessicurl Gentle Lather Shampoo, Elucence, Bedhead Superstar
Conditioner: Jessicurl Too Shea conditioner, DermOrganic Masque, Redken All Soft
Style: DermOrganic Argan Oil Treatment/Serum, Kinky Curly Knot Today leave-in, Kerastase Nectar Thermique, Oyin Hair Dew
Sometimes, I honestly think that people do not think before they speak. Kids can be cruel, but adults should know better.
Speckla
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Okay, this has happened before when I was a kid, but not for years. Tonight I went to the grocery store and a group of teens BARKED at me! (Because of my "poodle hair," I guess.)

=(
Originally Posted by irishlass1029
I've been called poodle recently and had people make comments like that at work. I turned around and held my hands up like paws, panted like a dog and the person just shook their head and walked away.

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