hurtful comments people've made about your hair

Like Tree132Likes

some kid called me "the hair", not even the girl with the hair just "the hair".
I have been called pom pom. not horrible, but i HATE it. this girl in my class also once made a motion and a sound implying how hugely puffy my hair is. it got me sooooo mad

Last edited by chocolate_lover; 07-31-2009 at 11:54 PM.
It's been quite interesting reading some of these posts.

I actually haven't had any negative comments.. but I remember in grade 7, I used to straighten my hair all the time. When I finally embraced my curly hair, it was really fizzy and dry, so everyone was like "uhh.. you don't look that great with curly hair. i like it better straight". I got sick of it myself so I straightened it again until Summer.
Then when I went to High School everyone loved and complimented on my hair. (:
I to remember the days, PE class, the required shower afterwards, we were also required to wash our hair as they used it as a personal hygiene class also. All I could think about was the 3 hours I spent the night before under a dryer with big purple rollers to mess it up 4th hour on Mon, Wed, & Fri. After PE class it was pulled back in a ponytail & I threw on a bandana to cover it up.

My mother has extremely curly hair & in the early 60's we didn't have very good hair care products or she didn't have a clue how to care of it. Mom would want the frizzies to go away so she would slather me up in the old VO5 hair dressing. My hair would be so greasy, I got teased for having oily dirty hair all day at school. Then I would go home & shampoo 3 or 4 times to get out the grease, made mom mad I was frizzy again.

SO we went to the big rollers & Dippity Doo Setting gel. Mom would put way to much on to try to hold it & then it would flake off & look like I had dandruff, got laughed at for having dandruff constantly. I even had kids throw me a bottle of head & shoulders & tell me to learn to wash my hair once in a while.

For my 16th birthday in 1976, I had saved my own money for a long time & mom let me go to the mall with a friend. I bought a LONG straight wig as close to my natural color as I could get, about waist lenght. I went to a salon at the mall & had my waist lenght hair cut off to about 3 inches wet lenght so I had room to put a wig on, LOL. When I walked in the house wearing this wig, the look on my mom's face put the fear of God in me, I knew I was toasted. She was mad for a while, but ended up she liked it better than the 2 inch puffball my hair was. I wore that wig for 2 years, then continued to buy wigs probably another 4 years or so, NO ONE seen my hair in these years.

Then was when I finally decided to "let it go natural", I was tired of fighting a losing battle. Now I would rather have the curls than straight. Wash, detangle, condition, towel dry, use a little glaze to hold & let er' dry. Now I have to try the no poo method & see how this works for me too.
Well, I am of Dominican decent (my parents were born there, i was born in the NYC), but of course, as all us new yorkers, we describe ourselves through our parents heritage. So in DR, we have different kinds of hair, but if you had curly or dried up hair you would always relax it because you needed to have "good hair" WHATEVER THAT MEANS! Everything is about good hair or bad hair! So since i was like 4 my mom had my head in rollers and wraps- because she had jet black fine "good hair" so she didnt really know what to do with the red ball of frizz! So i'm a natural red head (dark red) and i remember waiting for the train to get to ballet classes and this lady storms over to my mom and goes on and on about my red hair and if it was dyed bla bla bla. then shes goes on saying, omg i want this hair but UGHH NOT THAT HAIR TYPE as she like, grabbed my locks in disgust! i couldnt have been more than 8 and i remember how i was like WTF and that little clip plays thru my head always when people say "good" or "bad" hair.

i've heard tons of crap about my hair. but the "good" or "bad" hair is what GETS me because that is prevalant in my culture... i guess that's why i'm obssessed with the flat iron...
para los gustos se hicieron los colores

i has no hair type? (medium, f-iii), normal porosity, LOW elasticity.
CG journey began 2/8/09 - 4-08-09.. and then mod cg 4/14/09 -... 03/02/10- Barely CG but I like CG products
wash with Low Poo or Poo
condition with GVP Conditioning Balm or CJ BC Daily, Loreal Color Vive for Color Treated Hair Thats Normal
Leave ins- Garnier S&S; Marrakesh oil
style with - Ohm SHP; KCCC- BRHG or Boots- KCCC- BRHG; CIAB; CCCC
Protein- GVP Joico K-Pak
Play with ACV
A "friend" said I had a permanent helmet on my head.
and someone wrote that I had a"mushroom head" on the bathroom wall in HS when I first got my hair cut!

ughhh....what us curlies endure.....
....but its worth it in the end!!

thick, 3b curls
it is a proven fact that people do not think before they open their mouths. a couple of years back when my church was hosting a convention, my pastor wanted me to relax my hair because i was an embarressment to him. i almost left that day to never go back to that church.
delete

Last edited by Ondulee; 04-20-2010 at 12:44 PM.
I'm recently trying to go CG and live with my curly hair.

I was getting comments from my sister and BIL like, "why don't you ever comb your hair"? even when I just finished trying to beat down the frizz with a comb or brush.(when i was trying to straigthen it).

So, Now that I'm trying to go CG, the comments are " why do you like looking like a slob, You might think it looks nice but anyone with brains and eyes thinks differently, only smooth soft hair looks nice".

My BIL also grabbed a chunk of my hair the other night and tried to flip it, like he thought it wasn't attached to my head! He almost pulled me off my chair by yanking so hard, saying" why don't you do something with this wild stuff''.

So I can't win either way, my hair is ugly when I try to straighten it and even uglier when it's curly...
Originally Posted by Frizzly

OMG! That is so mean! Retort with a nice "at least mine isn't fried" remark.

Im so sorry people go through this!
I'm starting to love my hair

WARNING: I come with spelling errors.

Loving the IceQueen Method

The biggest fight that we will never win, is the one with out hair.

I've gotten all these same "compliments" before too, no sense in telling the same hum-drum story.

I just have a comment. I think and have noticed that most of the people who have anything negative to say about our beautiful locks are usually women. I have a feeling they just might be envious.

My husband absolutely loves them. Thinks they are the most sexy things in the world, and I also believe most men feel this way too.

I have a little secret too. I really think men with curly hair are super gorgeous.
3b B ii/iii
Poo/Condish: Wash w/Poo 1x p/w. Co-Wash 4-5x p/w. Whatever is on sale at the Salons!
Leave-in: JF/FE Curl Around, brush out/style.
Curly CURRENTLY: L'Oreal SL Curl Spray/CW Curl Creme/FX Curl Boost Gel/Water Cocktail.
Straight: FE Wind Down, InStyler FE Secret Weapon. Super soft lovely!
I'm recently trying to go CG and live with my curly hair.

I was getting comments from my sister and BIL like, "why don't you ever comb your hair"? even when I just finished trying to beat down the frizz with a comb or brush.(when i was trying to straigthen it).

So, Now that I'm trying to go CG, the comments are " why do you like looking like a slob, You might think it looks nice but anyone with brains and eyes thinks differently, only smooth soft hair looks nice".

My BIL also grabbed a chunk of my hair the other night and tried to flip it, like he thought it wasn't attached to my head! He almost pulled me off my chair by yanking so hard, saying" why don't you do something with this wild stuff''.

So I can't win either way, my hair is ugly when I try to straighten it and even uglier when it's curly...
Originally Posted by Frizzly


weeeeelll just so you know your hair is NOT ugly!! especially when it's curly! lol....but you said your real new to CG so just know that it gets A LOT better with time...when i first started it kinda sucked to be honest, but its soo much better now. it will all be worth it.
3B~Fine, porus, and really long
HG's~Plopping and Homemade FSG!! Thank you BB
Proud To Be Egyptian!
"Your head is like a crown on you.
It is as beautiful as Mount Carmel.
Your hair is as smooth as purple silk.
I am captured by your flowing curls."
Song of Solomon 7:5 (NIRV)
I'm recently trying to go CG and live with my curly hair.



So I can't win either way, my hair is ugly when I try to straighten it and even uglier when it's curly...
Originally Posted by Frizzly
I often feel the same way and I have tried CG for almost a year. Still experimenting. Seems like my hair doesn't fall into a nice little category.

One of my "supposed" best girl friends said to me, "You wouldn't understand having hair like yours, mine is super silky and I get complimented all the time. I feel so bad your hair is like it is." .....Wow..made me feel like grabbing the first bag I could find and putting it on my "ugly, wirey, coarse uncontrollable head of hair"...
P-Nut Still researching
3(ABC)??? very coarse, protein & glycerin sensitve,
CO Wash: Suave Coconut, VO5 MM
CO: AOHR, KCKT,
Style: KCCC, BRHG, Love this combo!-AOMM
Experimenting with ACV (so far so good), honey!!! (love it), Waiting to try:Phyto, KBB,RC...My hair hates CK...unless I am using it wrong...
http://public.fotki.com/P-Nutcurlz/hair/pw:walnut
I'm recently trying to go CG and live with my curly hair.



So I can't win either way, my hair is ugly when I try to straighten it and even uglier when it's curly...
Originally Posted by Frizzly
I often feel the same way and I have tried CG for almost a year. Still experimenting. Seems like my hair doesn't fall into a nice little category.

One of my "supposed" best girl friends said to me, "You wouldn't understand having hair like yours, mine is super silky and I get complimented all the time. I feel so bad your hair is like it is." .....Wow..made me feel like grabbing the first bag I could find and putting it on my "ugly, wirey, coarse uncontrollable head of hair"...
Originally Posted by P-NUTCurlz
What an awful, stuck-up thing to say! That's just beggin' for Karma to make it all fall out.

And Frizzly, what you're dealing with sounds downright abusive. I give you major props for not knocking their teeth out and telling them to do something about those nasty bare gums.
OMG, LOOK!!

...It's a siggie.
.

Last edited by Ondulee; 04-20-2010 at 02:27 PM.
I was thinking outloud today and I said, "I'm kind of bored with my hair." My mom, out of nowhere, chimes in and says, "You need to relax it!" I replied, "No, I'm not straightening it again." I used to straighten my hair but It got incredibly damaged and started to fall out. My mom proceeded to tell me that if I wanted nice hair I needed to "spend some time on it like celebrities." I told her that celebrities don't spend any time on their hair because they buy it.

Ugh! Everyone else has been so accepting of my hair but she still thinks I need to relax it. I'm never going to be a slave to my hair ever again.
It sucks to hear people talk about their natural curls & waves like they're a bad thing. It's one thing to personally *prefer* a straight look, but to feel like you *have* to straighten hair to make yourself look "sexy" or "human"? That is nuts.

I think non-straight hair is associated with insanity & wildness..the curlier the crazier. Who knows why.
It sucks to hear people talk about their natural curls & waves like they're a bad thing. It's one thing to personally *prefer* a straight look, but to feel like you *have* to straighten hair to make yourself look "sexy" or "human"? That is nuts.

I think non-straight hair is associated with insanity & wildness..the curlier the crazier. Who knows why.
Originally Posted by Darina
Not trying to turn this into a political or racial thread at all but I think the reasoning is that most people associate curls with ethnicity. This is of course false and downright silly.

I think curls are beautiful, but I also sometimes straighten my hair as well.

I just want to say to get back on to the subject that I just recently straightened my hair (not permanent) and I can't even count how many people told me "oh you should do your hair like that always... its so pretty"... like my hair is not otherwise.

Whatever.
3b B ii/iii
Poo/Condish: Wash w/Poo 1x p/w. Co-Wash 4-5x p/w. Whatever is on sale at the Salons!
Leave-in: JF/FE Curl Around, brush out/style.
Curly CURRENTLY: L'Oreal SL Curl Spray/CW Curl Creme/FX Curl Boost Gel/Water Cocktail.
Straight: FE Wind Down, InStyler FE Secret Weapon. Super soft lovely!
It sucks to hear people talk about their natural curls & waves like they're a bad thing. It's one thing to personally *prefer* a straight look, but to feel like you *have* to straighten hair to make yourself look "sexy" or "human"? That is nuts.

I think non-straight hair is associated with insanity & wildness..the curlier the crazier. Who knows why.
Originally Posted by Darina
Not trying to turn this into a political or racial thread at all but I think the reasoning is that most people associate curls with ethnicity. This is of course false and downright silly.

I think curls are beautiful, but I also sometimes straighten my hair as well.

I just want to say to get back on to the subject that I just recently straightened my hair (not permanent) and I can't even count how many people told me "oh you should do your hair like that always... its so pretty"... like my hair is not otherwise.

Whatever.
Originally Posted by LilMissDiva
LilMissDiva,

I get the same thing when I iron. (I just cut off all the relaxed hair about a month ago.) I've gotten mostly compliments on my short 3B-4A curls like "You look younger", or "You look hip".

I've only used the iron about three times in the last year. This past weekend, however, this old bag made me REALLY MAD...

On Saturday, I was all natural, as usual, even though the curls were a little frizzy. So what, it's me...

Sunday morning, though, the curls were really frizzy. The temperature outside was in the 20s, so wetting the curls was out of the question. So I decided to pull out the iron (again, something I rarely do; but it was partly for variety's sake).

I got mostly compliments from my friends (of course, it's straight..), but what really irked me was an old friend of my mom (literally, she's just like the one in the movie Madagascar) said, "I like your hair better like that, straight. I don't like how you had it yesterday."

I said, "But that's my natural hair."

"I don't care, I don't like it!"

"But it's what God gave me. He thinks curls look good on me."

Another woman stepped in to break it up before it got ugly and said, "My hair is wavy. I like to do different things with it, too."

I just smiled at her and walked away.

I'm still seething underneath, but I immediately thought of all the ladies here that have to deal with the same thing.

I find that all hair, I don't care what your ethnicity is, whether stick straight or kinky curly is beautiful. And I think it's OK to do whatever you want with it. It's just sad that some people think it has to look a certain way for you to be considered beautiful.

Oh well, thank you for letting me vent. I'm going to go and wash and let the curls run wild!

"Sometimes I lie awake at night, and I ask, 'Where have I gone wrong?' Then a voice says to me, 'This is going to take more than one night.' "
- Charlie Brown
HEY!!! Follow me at http://www.twitter.com/kurleeedna
delete

Last edited by Ondulee; 04-20-2010 at 12:46 PM.
Ugh, KurleeEdna, I want to go through your post and give her a piece of my mind! Honestly, thinking it could or should ever make a difference what you like on someone else's head?? Ridiculous. I'm glad the wavy-head stepped up, she sounds cool.
OMG, LOOK!!

...It's a siggie.

Trending Topics


Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On



All times are GMT -6. The time now is 09:04 PM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2014, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Copyright 2011 NaturallyCurly.com