hurtful comments people've made about your hair

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Went to Ulta today. Wasn't sure what I wanted, product wise, and was wandering the aisles kind of aimlessly. Stylist asks if I want help, so I ask for a product recommendation. She has thin, crappy straight hair and her eyes get all big and I can tell she's scared and clueless. She calls over some lady with hair that looked blown out to help. Lady grabs a chunk of my hair and goes "Ooh, sweetie you need a keratin treatment." I backed away a step and went "NO!" in a tone that was probably slightly more aggressive than strictly necessary. She went on to recommend all smoothing and blow drying products. Needless to say, I walked out empty handed.
I was told the other day that I should just "straighten the jewfro because it isn't chic enough". A guy I know actually turned to the person who said that and said that he thought my hair was very pretty and unique...totally unexpected and made my day
I was working the Student Athletics office at the local school and we had students walking in all the time looking for my colleagues.

Once my colleague (who mans the reception counter) walked in after a student and said really loudly, "That student was looking for xxx and guess what I told him? Go through the door and walk past the lion (me) and you'll see him."

She thought it was really funny but I was really embarrassed and hurt.


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I was told the other day that I should just "straighten the jewfro because it isn't chic enough". A guy I know actually turned to the person who said that and said that he thought my hair was very pretty and unique...totally unexpected and made my day
Originally Posted by Musique
Thats lovely - people rarely stand up to rudeness like that

I think I would have kissed him lol
My mom ued to call me Enstein, and the kids at school used to call me afro. I also had boy short hair that didn't exactly help people used to say if you'd only straighten it you'd look so good.

Last edited by curlycappie; 02-02-2011 at 05:29 PM. Reason: spellng mistake.
Oh where do I begin?????......................... I mean it was pretty rough for me as a young one and I wore my hair blowdried out most of the time as a kid because my mom refused to deal with my "curly nappy mess" (her words)...... So I had a big poofy embarrassing mess

One time my grandma got so frustrated with my hair that she decided to take to me to the hairdresser so they could do it that failed they skipped me and went to the next person! and when grandma said somethin about it they said I would be next but they skipped me again!!! My little feeling were so hurt. I was like 8.....

Lets see in school I got called : Afro puff, Wooly mammoth (I had a mustache too and mom wouldnt let me shave it)mustache, chubakka, buckshot, beedabee, nappy, a hairy man, sideburns........okay the list goes on and on. Some times I would wash my hair in the morning and put it in a ponytail for school and you would be able to see some curls poppin out and someone would shout "Here comes buckshot everybody duck!!!!" Someone would always be tellin me to go shave or get a perm (relaxer). Or they would say that I need to tell my mom to "do my hair". Kids can be cruel right?!

Adults are no better.....
I would be at the hairdresser and people would just stare at me horrified. And nobody would want to do my hair so I would have wait FOREVER. Then when it was finally my turn and they would see my hair start to curl as it got wet, they would start to freak out and argue amongst themselves about who was going to do my hair (as if I couldn't hear them.) And it would be so embarrassing because when I would get my hair blowdried the comb attatchment would keep falling off and the stylist would curse at me and tell me how much I need a relaxer and how I shouldnt be going to the hairdresser without having a relaxer (which is probably why i get anxiety attacks if i just see a hair salon....).

Then when I wanted to go natural I was told by my EX hairstylist (her is 2a ish mine is 3c and very similar to EmpressRi) --- and quote you don't have hair like you me can't go natural. You either need a relaxer or you need to blow dry your hair straight, but you can't be natural unquote She also once referred to her and another girls hair as "good hair" and my hair as "little black girl hair" So what is she tryna say about little black girls?!?!

Then last but not least my ex friend who is a curlie but now tex laxes i think......she would always put me down for my hair. She would say stuff like "I have good hair and you have that nappy black people stuff" So ignorant!

Anyways I wish they both could see my hair now, its so fantabulous!!! I get so many complients. Some people are still ignorant tho. I still get asked "where do you buy your weave from" or "where did you buy your ponytail from?" And I'm like uh its mine. But um this site has help me so much, I'm in my second transition and I did a mini bc on Jan 18th of this year. And thanks to empressri for all her product reviews and vids.

K im done rambling. Sorry this is sooo long. Please forgive me.

ps my DH looooves my curly hair and actually prefers it curly. Isn't he adorable??????

Last edited by GlammedCurlyDiva; 02-03-2011 at 01:24 PM.
I've gotten used to people gawking and starring at me, but the most annoying was this one time in CVS around sophomore year. I was standing in line and these two ignorant "women" (they both needed to grow the F' up) started singing "I Wanna Rock With You" by Michael Jackson. At first, I thought it was just out of the blue until I walked out of the store. These two apparently didn't have lives (and had a thing against my afro), because they kept singing it and then laughed at me behind my back. I didn't look at them because I don't like fighting with people and these two weren't worth my time anyways. I hate jerks.
I've gotten used to people gawking and starring at me, but the most annoying was this one time in CVS around sophomore year. I was standing in line and these two ignorant "women" (they both needed to grow the F' up) started singing "I Wanna Rock With You" by Michael Jackson. At first, I thought it was just out of the blue until I walked out of the store. These two apparently didn't have lives (and had a thing against my afro), because they kept singing it and then laughed at me behind my back. I didn't look at them because I don't like fighting with people and these two weren't worth my time anyways. I hate jerks.
Originally Posted by PeachNap

That is so crazy something similar happened to me.....It was when I first started wearing my hair naturally curly and we had just moved to a new neighborhood. So, I go outside and I'm thinkin I look too cute and someone in a group of kids (teens) pointed at me and said "look yall she looks like Michael Jackson !!!! Hee hee!!!!" And then they all started laughin and sing michael jackson songs.

So stupid. I empathize with you I really do....
I (thankfully!) haven't really been insulted about my hair very much - maybe a couple of snide comments from kids who thought they were clever in middle school, but I can't remember specifically - but I have a fellow curly friend who has definitely gotten her fair share of remarks. Though most of them have been positive (her hair really is astounding), she has gotten the "poodle" label more than once. I remember one time someone called her a poodle and she turned around and told them they looked exactly like an Afghan hound.

I think there is a type of dog to describe everyone's hair.
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I used to get things like '' Your hair looks like a bush'' and ''FrizzHead'' -.-'
Oh well, i love my hair !

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When I was little getting school pictures, the teachers and photographers would all hand me those evil little black combs. You know the ones with super small teeth that break off easy? They would basically force me to use them, even when I said I liked my hair. They'd be like "this will make it look nicer" and watch me struggle to comb my hair. I used to go home and just cry to mom that I would never look good for pictures.
My senior portrait photographer loved my hair. So eat that Lifetouch.
Originally Posted by alaskantsunami

OMIGOD I REMEMBER THOSE! ugh. i always dreaded picture days. *shudders*
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OMIGOD I REMEMBER THOSE! ugh. i always dreaded picture days. *shudders*
Originally Posted by Etincelle
I know they were the worst! I hated how every year I had teachers and photographers with straight hair who never realized those combs don't work for everyone. Come to think of it, in elementary school I never had many curly classmates either.
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I had a dream last night that someone was insulting my hair and in the dream I actually thought "I'm gonna post this on the hurtful comments thread!"
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My friend saying this to my other friend....

"upset.. all of this natural talk... everybody all of a sudden wants to wear there her natural and curly.. and thats ok..i say go for it.. but i did it FOREVER ago... and its cool for a couple ppl to do-- i think tiaras [me] short hair is cute.... but y everybody wanna steal my hair style... :/ i feel like they're stealing my individuality lol..."

I feel like that was kind of rude...and when she said she did it forever ago, she's been natural about 4 years. But I feel like it was rude because she makes it seem like I was following her... or other people are following her...when in reality...people go natural for different reasons, not because they want to be like other people...

I feel like saying that is like saying...I started working out 4 years ago all of a sudden everybody wants to lose weight. lol...I mean she isn't the first person to go natural....

Ok, I'm done ranting lol.
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My friend saying this to my other friend....

"upset.. all of this natural talk... everybody all of a sudden wants to wear there her natural and curly.. and thats ok..i say go for it.. but i did it FOREVER ago... and its cool for a couple ppl to do-- i think tiaras [me] short hair is cute.... but y everybody wanna steal my hair style... :/ i feel like they're stealing my individuality lol..."

I feel like that was kind of rude...and when she said she did it forever ago, she's been natural about 4 years. But I feel like it was rude because she makes it seem like I was following her... or other people are following her...when in reality...people go natural for different reasons, not because they want to be like other people...

I feel like saying that is like saying...I started working out 4 years ago all of a sudden everybody wants to lose weight. lol...I mean she isn't the first person to go natural....

Ok, I'm done ranting lol.
Originally Posted by Danyele
She should have been happy that her friend decided to go natural as well. I'm sure that she has enough identity and characteristics to have it "stolen" by someone going natural, lol.
OK, so when it's ridiculously cold, instead of walking to and/or from school, I catch the bus. It was snowing like crazy and freezing one day like two weeks ago, and I was on my way home from school. The bus that I get on sometimes have a lot of high school students from the nearby high school, and that day was the case. A group of girls were in the back talking really loud about stuff and people on the bus, and then I overheard them talking about me. One of them said, "... but that's too nappy," and proceeded to say that I need a relaxer on that "mess." I turned around and said, "Well, I'd like to see how straight your hair is without a relaxer," to all of them. I didn't know which one said it, so I said it to all of them, lol. Then one of them said, "That wasn't me, that was her," then the rest played the innocent game too. When I turned around I heard them saying more mean things about my hair, but I didn't care anymore. We were on the resting part when all of this happened right in front of my university. They started talking loud again, and then the bus driver yelled at him when he got back on. That was funny, lol.
I know this thread is pretty old, but I just wanted to add my 2 cents. I was called a bird's nest (typically). It was said my hair looks like if a cooking pot with spaghetti would explode, if I would fall from the truck and have to brake with my head.
A classmates mum said at that time about my hair it would be looking like a mop. But the funny thing is, her son is 27 years old now and is going pretty bald)))))))))))))

Last edited by Tati-Ana; 03-24-2011 at 01:37 PM.
I have not really experienced people saying hurtful things to me about my hair. Maybe it's because I have always been natural and the town I grew up in was super small so people were use to seeing me and most of my family (immediate and extended) with natural hair.

I would occasionally get asked about why I did not relax my hair because relaxed (Straight) hair looks better. However, I did not take it as an insult because that's someones personal opinion which does not matter to me.

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All i here on here is negative things about moms! well guess what? my mom is no different! Im 45 now and as a kid, my mom made me cry evertime shed have to brush my hair(grammer school) now that im older she still has never said anything good toward my hair, no matter how ive worn it! shes constantly saying " your brother has such pretty hair, i wish i had his hair" his hair is culrly also and i love his hair but mine is curly his is more kinky ( no offense brother) and she never has anything positive to say about my hair. i caught her telling my daughter" long hair looks ok if its not all messy and just hanging ther" i overheard her becuz i was standinding right outside and i heard my name come up. that was hurtfull! Id give an inch of my hair just to hear her say" i like u hair" Guess what! that inch will never leave my head lol! So, weve got eachother on this site. Who needs a mothers positive thoghts? well its plain to see we did and do! then we probly wouldnt have so many negative thoghts about our hair! just venting! Lisa45
Ive read alot of the thread on here. Nobody has anything good to say about their mothers when it comes to their hair and having to grow up with curly hair. Well guess what guys! i have nothing to say good about my mom neither! Growing up when she was forced to do my hair for school(grammer) shed make me cry everytime. Shed yank at it and say i never brushed it, ive got very thick hair like my dad had. his hair was curly, kinky. She would tug at it really hard, then yell at me for crying. i was always afraid when it came hair combing time! Im now 45 with waist long hair (curly) I over heard her telling my daughter "when i went to michael(hair stylist) i was asking him if i should cut my hair shorter. he said when u dont do anything with it but just have it hanging ther all messy you should think about cutting it in to a stly that looks good" now she said that out loud to my daughter while i was sitting outside. After i asked her what she was saying she said" oh i was telling alissa when ur hair hair is long and messy maybe u should cut it , becuz it doesnt look good!" As long as ive had her as my mom LoL! shes never said anything positive about my hair. my brother has longer hair than i do (curly, kinky) she constantly saying how she wishes she had his hair! I too love my brothers hair but he doesnt take care of it and not to say anything negative about his hair cuz i love his curls but i do blieve my hair is thicker. No matter what ive done to my hair sraighten, highlights, shoulder lenghth ect... she has never said anything positive about my hair.... thanks mom! What happened to helping ur kids have good self esteem? Thanks for listening and letting me vent. lisa45

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