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-   -   Stop Touching My Hair!!!!! (http://www.naturallycurly.com/curltalk/hall-shame-discussion/61784-stop-touching-my-hair.html)

TheFabFan 11-16-2008 01:14 PM

Stop Touching My Hair!!!!!
 
I am getting sick of everyone grabbing at my hair. every time i turn around somebody is yanking at it. Just today at the mall i had 7 people do it without even asking, its like they think that just because it's curly it's their own personal playground! does this ever happen to you?

ReddishRocks 11-16-2008 07:19 PM

Yep. It happens a lot to me, but more often when I was younger. In my case, I think it has more to do with the color - it doesn't photograph especially well, but there's something about mall lighting that makes people want to touch it, LOL!

If your avatar pic is you, you have beautiful, fluffy curls. I would want to touch your hair too. :D

Ms. Cloud 11-17-2008 04:57 AM

What the f***? I donīt understand these people , they have no respect. Your hair is very special and beautiful, but you just don`t touch other people like this! It didn`t happen often to me, but this one time i went shopping,i remember this salesgirl staring at my head, while i wanted to pass her and try on some t- shirts, she just babbled: "Oh, this hair is real? Unbelievable!" Then she grabbed some of my locks and made them frizzy while i was standing there, stunned. Ehhh...?
Next time iīm just going to reach out my hand, grab this person`s hair, make it a real mess and say. "Oh your hair`s so special i may touch it, don`t i !?" harhar...:blob:

Paraty 11-17-2008 08:23 AM

Yeah, this has happened to me twice since I went natural. Once by a friend and once by a co-worker (I work at a professional firm so it can happen there too;-) ). Both times, neither of them asked, just reached for my hair and touched? It has also happened to a couple of friends and relatives of mine by complete strangers. It's like an epidemic lol! I wonder if they would ever reach out and touch the straight hair of a woman. I personally wouldn't since I know it takes some people hours to straighten their hair and have it lay perfectly the way they want it. Yet, I also know that people work hard to style their textured hair 'just right'. That's the reason I would never reach out and grab curly/coily/kinky hair without asking and without making sure my hands are clean first lol! I also think it may happen more frequently among people with afro textured hair since that's seen less by the majority, and is more foreign to people. That's changing of course.

irishlass1029 11-17-2008 09:28 AM

Thank goodness that has lessened as I have aged, but it used to happen ALL THE TIME. It's a very unusual color red and very curly (4a) so people were constantly pawing at it. Talk about violating your space! It's SO rude, but yet they think if they are saying something "nice" it makes it okay. Wonder how they would feel if I went up and grabbed their "love handles" or belly fat or something?

MissTiss 11-17-2008 01:09 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by irishlass1029 (Post 793241)
Thank goodness that has lessened as I have aged, but it used to happen ALL THE TIME. It's a very unusual color red and very curly (4a) so people were constantly pawing at it. Talk about violating your space! It's SO rude, but yet they think if they are saying something "nice" it makes it okay. Wonder how they would feel if I went up and grabbed their "love handles" or belly fat or something?



Ha! Hey Irish, glad to see you in here...I mostly lurk, but had to post after I saw you.
Your curls are lookin' good.

Anyhow, I was just griping at my own mother for this. She started relaxing my hair (3c) at age 7 or so and I didn't stop until over 20 years later...so now that there are they pretty curls, she can't keep her mitts out of it. LOL!

My friends do it too and I cringe. Bah!

cherubcurls 11-17-2008 01:47 PM

Usually just lurking and learning...
 
but I had to post to this topic...Since going natural this has become a source of frustration. I'm not sure why people think it's okay to touch a grown person's hair. The funny thing is I can always see the glint in their eyes...you know, that twinkle that says, "I just gotta touch your hair..."

I'm wondering if we should touch their hair in response...or should I turn the other cheek...LOL....if anyone has a premptive measure that will stop folks from touching hair without premission, please post...

MissTiss 11-17-2008 01:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cherubcurls (Post 793549)
but I had to post to this topic...Since going natural this has become a source of frustration. I'm not sure why people think it's okay to touch a grown person's hair. The funny thing is I can always see the glint in their eyes...you know, that twinkle that says, "I just gotta touch your hair..."

I'm wondering if we should touch their hair in response...or should I turn the other cheek...LOL....if anyone has a premptive measure that will stop folks from touching hair without premission, please post...

Hahaha, premptive measures...I see that glint too. I've resorted to looking them straight in the eye, one fingers raised and I say, "Don't even think about it".

That usually works. I've been blasted from behind once, but most people are bold enough to touch your hair in front of your face. Blows my mind. That and when people touch pregnant bellies without permission. If someone ever does that to me, they're pulling back a bloody stump. I take no prisoners when it comes to my personal space.

southrncurls 11-17-2008 02:13 PM

I can remember very well when I was about seven and I had cotton white hair (of course it was curly) and I lived in TX about 5 miles from the border of Mexico. I use to have tons of people come up to my mom and I and ask if they could touch my hair because they weren't use to seeing such hair. It use to bother me when I was little but hey at least they asked. This was way before I worried about frizz.
But if anyone touched my hair at random (besides my husband) I think I would go crazy!

Speckla 11-17-2008 02:17 PM

Admiring is one thing but touching is another.

Hey, you have a really cute hiney - *pinch* I could get arrested for that! :disgust:

SarcasmIsBeauty 11-17-2008 02:52 PM

This happens to me EVERYDAYYYYYY, it's beyond annoying and makes me want to kick people! I really hate when people touch my hair, everyone sees my hair curly all the time (I rarely straighten my hair, and have been natural all my life) but yet people still like to touch. I don't understand!

mrl234 11-17-2008 02:56 PM

Yeah, it's happened to me. If it's a friend it's a little annoying but I can deal with it. I had a few strangers do it when my hair was super long. SO annoying.

Lil'curls 11-17-2008 03:05 PM

I thought I was alone in this problem, but I'm slowly starting to learn, I'm never alone in any of my hair problems.

This kid who sits behind me in class is constantly touching my hair, and it makes me so angry. I'm friends with him, but still. I try to just relax and say "it's just hair" but it kills me. He never does something simple, he has to mess it up completely. He plays with it as if he is planning on putting it in a bun.and comments on how it makes me look Greek. One time, I gave him a hair tie to try to keep it like that, and it actually looked pretty good. Then, he tells me "I'm going to come over and do your hair for you. I'll straighten it out. " That's when he really starts to get to me.

Now I'm really tense and angry just thinking about it.

rnconniesf 11-17-2008 03:22 PM

Happens all the time. I liken it to being pregnant and having strangers touch your belly. No respect. But I did have a fun experience last weekend with this. I was waiting in line to buy tickets to State Band Championships and I feel this tug on the back of my hair, right behind my ear (it hurt too!). I turn around guns blazing to find this little old lady with still curly, pure white hair. She smiles at me and says " I always wanted to do that to another curly top but you hardly ever see them now a days". She goes on to tell me that she's been curly since the late 20s "When it was all the rage". I just had to laugh. My husband was just waiting for the explosion he knew was coming by the look on my face but I just couldn't do it. How does one blast a 4 foot tall lady who has to be in her 90s? I let her slide, but no one else better try it or they'll get an ear full.

curlygirly9507 11-17-2008 03:54 PM

my friends do that ALL the time i will be like taking a test and i will feel someone touching my hair lol it gets really annoying after a while plus they make it all frizzy!!:p

finch 11-17-2008 04:10 PM

My kids are constantly messing with my hair now that I wear it curly (I used to straighten). The baby has a thing for grabbing my curls when he's on the changing table, especially. :binky:

cherubcurls 11-18-2008 03:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MissTiss (Post 793570)
Quote:

Originally Posted by cherubcurls (Post 793549)
but I had to post to this topic...Since going natural this has become a source of frustration. I'm not sure why people think it's okay to touch a grown person's hair. The funny thing is I can always see the glint in their eyes...you know, that twinkle that says, "I just gotta touch your hair..."

I'm wondering if we should touch their hair in response...or should I turn the other cheek...LOL....if anyone has a premptive measure that will stop folks from touching hair without premission, please post...

Hahaha, premptive measures...I see that glint too. I've resorted to looking them straight in the eye, one fingers raised and I say, "Don't even think about it".

That usually works. I've been blasted from behind once, but most people are bold enough to touch your hair in front of your face. Blows my mind. That and when people touch pregnant bellies without permission. If someone ever does that to me, they're pulling back a bloody stump. I take no prisoners when it comes to my personal space.

Perhaps we could have a button that we wear with our pointer finger on it with the saying, "No one messes with these tresses! Please don't touch without this curly's permission". I believe this could work with the take no prisoners approach :laughing1:

Twilight Angel 11-18-2008 05:45 PM

I take it as a huge compliment. It means your hair looks so silky and soft people want to touch it. But after that it tends to get frizzy :p

Eilis19 11-18-2008 06:09 PM

I've never had a stranger touch my hair, when I was little people used to ask my mom if she permed my hair and she'd look at them, then her hyperactive 3 year old. back at them and go "are you kidding?" I have a friend who will isolate one curl and pull on it and let it go saying "curly, straight! curly, straight!" Her hair is stick straight so it's all entertaining for her. I don't mind it, I really quite like having my hair played with, you know, by friends and family and stylists who I'm paying, but I don't know what I'd do with a stranger o_O

pinkwolf 11-18-2008 06:27 PM

I've never had a stranger come up to me and touch my hair. But when I was a little girl, people would ALWAYS touch it.


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