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Old 09-25-2009, 07:46 PM   #81
 
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Originally Posted by Boomygrrl View Post
Most of the time, it doesn't annoy me. I think what annoys me (and it's clearly my issue, I know) is when someone who has mostly straight hair (and it's occasionally wavy looking on the ends because they didn't flat-iron it that day) talks about having curly hair and they think they can relate to problems that curly haired people have. I know someone like this. She's 90 percent straight with a little wave on the bottom of her hair...she talks about having frizz issues and how her hair is sooooo dry. I feel like saying "Girl, you don't know the half of it."
I'm aware she might have hair issues as well, but she seems to exaggerate her issues. Her hair isn't dry...there isn't much frizz to it when she forgets to flat-iron...but, of course, I'm comparing her hair to mine. In her mind, it's oh so frizzy. Ack!!!
This totallyyy annoys me too! Also when they try to give me advice based on the things they do to "tame" their hair...Implying that clearly my hair looks like this because I'm not putting in enough effort (not sure if thats related to the original post though :P).
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Old 05-25-2010, 01:09 AM   #82
 
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Originally Posted by Salamander View Post
Well, I'm a wavy. I do have some 3a ringlets mixed in with my 2b/c waves, but I am a wavy rather than a true curly.

And I do see your point, to a degree. It's kind of similar to the way a 4'10" woman feels hearing her friend who who is 5'4" complain about the travails of being short, I imagine.

That being said, however, I (and my fellow wavies) face most of the same hair challenges that our curlier cohorts do. Frizziness, poufiness, dryness, breakage, lack of definition, triangle-head, hairstylists that pressure me to blow dry and flatiron, etc..

Some of the best hair advice I have came from the 3c and 4a boards. I definitely have more in common with Curlies than with straight-haired people, that's for sure.

And when you come right down to it, I *do* technically have curly hair. It forms nice fat ringlety curls, they are just bigger and more stretched out than, say, a Type 3b. The differences between me and a "real" curly are just a matter of degree.

BTW those smooth-haired wavy celebrities probably don't actually have wavy hair. Remember, they have hordes of stylists armed with flatirons and hot rollers following them around. So just because Joss Stone doesn't seem to have frizz doesn't mean a typical 2c won't sport some rather spectacular frizz.

If anything, wavy frizz issues can often be WORSE than a curlier person's -- because a surprising number of us have no clue how to handle our hair, and simply assume that it is inexplicably unmanageable. For years I could not figure out why my hair always resembled a giant and rather untidy birds' nest, despite my best efforts, until a helpful curly-haired friend gently pointed out that it probably was very wavy and perhaps I should embrace its natural texture and start treating it nicely.

Add to that the typical wavy dilemma of "Does my hair look wavy or just extremely messy?" and the fact that most of us seem to sport three different textures of hair on the same head -- the grass isn't all that much greener over here!
Sorry to bump this rather old post, but I really wanted to say.. +1!

Wavies and curlies have different issues, just as curlies and type 4's have some different issues, but I think, in the end, ALL of our hair requires much more tender love and care than straight hair does, and I truly believe a wavy can learn more from a curly than a straighty... because our hair CAN get the collasol frizz and other problems just like curly hair, even if our curl pattern is much looser, just as it has a tendency to look so messy.

Case-in-point: me on a very bad hair day:
Ppl With Wavy Hair Think Its Curly. Am I the only one who's annoyed by this?-messyhair.jpg

It looks epically unkempt, especially at the bottom, as if I'd put no time into my hair (even though I did!). Oh and that halo of frizz? It's nothin'.. I've had WAY worse.. I've seen some wavies and curlies sporting that kind of frizz, but never on a wavy. Their frizz just doesn't do that, and it tends to be straight to boot (and thus a bit easier to handle).

But on the flipside, I personally go out of my way to call my hair wavy. I think too many wavies wish they were straight or curly and choose to identify as one of those instead, and strive to be more straight or more curly, so I am seeking to try to find peace with my hair for what it is (WAVY!) and not try to be something I'm not.. so I intentionally call it wavy most times, even though most people in my life refer to it as curly. I think a wavy trying to enhance curl just to look like a 3A is going to be as unhappy as a wavy trying to flatiron their hair into submission.. because it just isn't going to work all the time, and it's easier to find peace in what you already HAVE, and work it for what it is. That's just my 2 cents.

But woe-wise, I think the wavies DO belong with the curlies. I think we all got it bad, just in different ways. Darn hair! Why can't it just be easy sometimes?
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Old 06-27-2010, 10:44 AM   #83
 
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these pll piss me offffff..... There is one girl in my class with wavy about 2something hair and she is always ranting about how hard it is to deal with. Like saying that i have no idea, when i have 3b curly hair that is tangle prone
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Old 06-27-2010, 11:17 AM   #84
 
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I think it gets offensive when someone with wavy or very loose curl (wavy) uses the term curly negatively. Like "ugh I hate when my hair is curly blah blah blah blah" and there hair is no where near curly so in comparison you're hair must be garbage. But then again they're probably not thinking about you. Like when I say "gah I'M SO FAT!" when actually said to someone who actually IS overweight, they can take that as offensive too, but I'm not even worried about their body I'm worried about mine.
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Old 06-27-2010, 01:24 PM   #85
 
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Wavies suffer from a lot of the same issues that curlies do. Frizz expansion, triangle head, the look we get when we brush it (EW), loss of protein, loss of moisture and dryness, all of that happens BECAUSE OUR HAIR HAS MOVEMENT. Those with stick straight hair don't have the same issues we do.

I think the grass is always greener at the other side of the fence. It doesn't bother me when someone says their hair is curly when it's more wavy; I think to the general public, curly is wavy (where there's a wave there's a curl anyone?)is curly. I actually call myself a wurly, because it's not wave, it's not curl, but it sure as HE^^ isn't straight either. Saying it's wurly puts me in a unique postition. HEHE....but I've had people with less wave than me call me curly and people with more curl than me say I'm barely wavy. Bend is wave, and my hair has plenty of bend to it.

What bothers me is the celebrity pics where their hair has been CURLED and the caption says it's curly. You can totally tell the truly natural pics and the curled ones. I love it when someone brings me a pic to my chair and it's a celebrity who's been curled and asked "why can't my curly hair look like that" so I can say "It can, roll it on a curling iron!!!"

I've learned to let my hair be my hair...some days it'll look 2A (or even 1C) and some days it'll look 3A or more. But it's always my hair and I always love it and I'll always be a WURLY. I totally agree with violagirl....when I try to flat iron my hair into submission I hate it, and when I try to get it to curl and it doesn't I get just as mad and unhappy. It is what it is.
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Old 06-27-2010, 03:02 PM   #86
 
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My older sister had very thick and course straight hair. If she cut it just right, she could get a slight wave to it. I on the other hand, had hair that was more soft and fine, and yes, I was always told by everyone in my family and hair stylists, that it was curly. When I don't straighten it, people tell me, "I like your hair better curly."

By comparison to my sister's hair, my hair is curly. I could let my hair air dry with no product, and it would form ringlets. Yes, I have a much easier time straightening it with the right products then my sister has making her hair curly without a chemical perm. However, if it rains or it's humid, my curls won't stay in a straight style, and then it does look awful.

I'm sure it's much more complicated if you have the kind of curly hair where you just can't go straight without a lot of chemicals or a lot of work. I can see why you would be annoyed with people who can easily transition between straight and curly.
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Old 06-27-2010, 07:04 PM   #87
 
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I get annoyed when people try to judge one's hair without them seeing it (either in person or through pictures) and seeing what the person goes through. I'm a 2c/3a combo of waves and ringlets. My hair in its natural state is definitely not straight. It's very thick and until I had layers cut into it and learned to use a diffuser, I had many of the same problems that those with a tighter curl pattern had. While some people with a very loose wave pattern can treat their hair the same way one with straight hair can, I definitely cannot. I tried that for years. My hair, even straightened, still looked like I had stuck my finger in an electric socket. I don't think you can really judge a wavy or a curly unless you have seen the hair in its natural state. Sure some people exaggerate, but others, like myself, really have had to work with our hair.

More importantly, naturally wavy hair is just as beautiful as naturally curly hair. This site is the only site that has great information for those with naturally wavy hair. Wavies have the right to be here too.
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Old 10-18-2010, 11:13 AM   #88
 
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It only did once before. I was at a friends house and we went swimming. After our hair dried we went back inside. The adults in the house took a look at my hair and started going on and on about how "exotic" I looked, how I shouldn't have straightened it in the first place, so on. My friend then jumps in like "my hair is curly too!" Her hair was literally stick straight with a little wave at the temple. What got to me about that was the fact that she then went on to give me tips that were obviously wrong "make sure you brush your hair out before school, it'll make it more wavy; you should shampoo your hair twice a day so that the chemicals weigh it down," so on. The tips worked for her pretty, long, fine blonde hair- not so much for my mass of thick curls and waves. It was only annoying because she obviously didn't.
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Old 10-18-2010, 01:52 PM   #89
 
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Originally Posted by turtles View Post
I think it gets offensive when someone with wavy or very loose curl (wavy) uses the term curly negatively. Like "ugh I hate when my hair is curly blah blah blah blah" and there hair is no where near curly so in comparison you're hair must be garbage. But then again they're probably not thinking about you. Like when I say "gah I'M SO FAT!" when actually said to someone who actually IS overweight, they can take that as offensive too, but I'm not even worried about their body I'm worried about mine.
^^^^^ Pretty much sums it up.
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Old 10-18-2010, 10:22 PM   #90
 
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Haha this post reminds me of this hair video I watched on YouTube
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pQxNMlgeDBI

At the beginning the first thing she says is "My hair is very curly and it gets frizzy." The first thing I thought was, "Your hair is NOT 'very curly'." I felt like such a b***h for thinking that... but now I guess it's nice to see I'm not alone!
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Old 10-19-2010, 07:04 AM   #91
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Curly is exotic. Curly is wild. Curly exudes confidence.

Everyone wants to be a curly for the good things but not for the bad things. There was a thread sometime ago where some controversy stemmed from this very point. Of course women with wavy hair (and men too) will say how curly their hair is and bla bla bla but they'd poop their pants if they had ringlets for curls. When the ringlets tangle oh boy, do we have a problem. Anyone who calls herself/himself a curly yet doesn't have ringlets and O's cannot appreciate what being a curly is. I will not discuss what curly is but I will say that as a man, growing my curls, I am truly appreciating the effort that having curly ringlets takes. Props to all the women with hair like mine.

Lastly, the curly thing is the same as people labeling themselves "Spanish". I have interacted with people who happened to have an ancestor from Spain and say they are "Spanish" because Hollywood portrays "Spanish" as passionate and energetic (which in a way is true). I am Spanish and I laugh at this, especially american girls with a latin american ancestor labeling themselves as "Spanish". This is surprisingly common, Cristina Aguilera being one example. Hispanic is not Spanish for god's sake!
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Old 10-21-2010, 08:26 AM   #92
 
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Originally Posted by Roy_Boy View Post
Curly is exotic. Curly is wild. Curly exudes confidence.

Everyone wants to be a curly for the good things but not for the bad things. There was a thread sometime ago where some controversy stemmed from this very point. Of course women with wavy hair (and men too) will say how curly their hair is and bla bla bla but they'd poop their pants if they had ringlets for curls. When the ringlets tangle oh boy, do we have a problem. Anyone who calls herself/himself a curly yet doesn't have ringlets and O's cannot appreciate what being a curly is. I will not discuss what curly is but I will say that as a man, growing my curls, I am truly appreciating the effort that having curly ringlets takes. Props to all the women with hair like mine.

Lastly, the curly thing is the same as people labeling themselves "Spanish". I have interacted with people who happened to have an ancestor from Spain and say they are "Spanish" because Hollywood portrays "Spanish" as passionate and energetic (which in a way is true). I am Spanish and I laugh at this, especially american girls with a latin american ancestor labeling themselves as "Spanish". This is surprisingly common, Cristina Aguilera being one example. Hispanic is not Spanish for god's sake!
i think arguing over what curly hair is and isn't on a website dedicated to curly hair is ridiculous, especially when you have a plethora of wavies here. so are all wavies not allowed on the site because it's naturallyCURLY? i'm confused now.

sorry roy, but a lot of the problems you talk about that you seem to think are problems that only people with defined ringlets have that apparently people with a little more wave to their hair don't (like tangles....wtf my hair tangles and gets matted like nobody's business), are definitely NOT exclusive to people with oh so wonderful ringlets. by making the definition of curly hair exclusive to only people with ringlets, you are basically saying "screw you" to a lot of people on this board (all the 2s and 4s). many of whom are still trying to come to terms with their natural texture. this debate was stupid when it was over on the main hair board and it's stupid now. if i read this as a newbie, i would have left thinking that i don't belong here because my hair isn't strictly 3a/b/c/
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Old 10-21-2010, 10:03 AM   #93
 
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i think arguing over what curly hair is and isn't on a website dedicated to curly hair is ridiculous, especially when you have a plethora of wavies here. so are all wavies not allowed on the site because it's naturallyCURLY? i'm confused now.

This is what I thought all along
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Old 10-21-2010, 11:42 AM   #94
 
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If I would have read this as a newbie and cared about what people thought on the interwebs, I would have left the boards. It would have indicated the people here have a "I'm better than you because insert a plethora of reasons here and you can never understand what it's like so QQ" complex. Oh please. Just spare us. This thread really cracks me up
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Old 10-21-2010, 02:56 PM   #95
 
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wow, i had no idea people were so passionate about what "type" of curl they have.
sheesh, we ALL share some sort of commonality. never thought id see people being biased based on hair!!!! it's quite ridiculous.
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Old 10-21-2010, 03:53 PM   #96
 
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I agree too, just because I don't have solid ringlets on my head doesn't mean my hair isn't curly. We're all supposed to be together here. Good grief, even people with straight hair get mats too!!!
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Old 10-21-2010, 04:28 PM   #97
 
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All waves, ringlets, kinks, s-pattern, etc. are curls.

They aren't straight hair right?!?!?!?!? This isn't changing to naturallynotstraight.com. Its naturallycurly.com for a reason.

I have gone through this argument ad nauseum in another thread and am amazed that the very one who argued this point to no end came here to continue his little minded rant on curls.

... now adding in complaints of what a person thinks their nationality is!!
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Old 10-21-2010, 04:29 PM   #98
 
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I agree too, just because I don't have solid ringlets on my head doesn't mean my hair isn't curly. We're all supposed to be together here. Good grief, even people with straight hair get mats too!!!
sshhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Some people think only perfect ringlets like them get "real tangles".

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Old 10-21-2010, 04:53 PM   #99
 
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I have gone through this argument ad nauseum in another thread and am amazed that the very one who argued this point to no end came here to continue his little minded rant on curls.

really?? you don't say?!

On another note the person who started this thread was 14yrs old! LMAO!!!!
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Old 10-21-2010, 05:23 PM   #100
 
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Everyone, relax. Let's be honest. While the general philosophy of care of hair types is quite similar, each hair type is quite different. If it weren't, we wouldn't even need this classification system to begin with.

For example. As a 2C/3A I have *no* idea what it is like to have kinky/Type 4 hair. The techniques used are quite different in my humble opinion. The products tend to be much heavier. Oils and butters and other products that I probably wouldn't go near are used to great effect in people with Type 4 hair. I can imagine, despite all the frustration I have with my own hair, it probably doesn't come close to what natural Type 4s experience (especially since many Type 4s also have rude relatives pushing relaxers on them day in and day out - as a 3A I don't have to deal with that pressure).

I think that's why I feel at least a tad bit offended when people with slightly wavy, yet still quite low-maintenance hair say their hair is curly... and complain about it. They just don't have the same social stigma that the curlier heads do, let alone the amount of work, research, and general lack of effective products available to them. Someone on here even did a poll of guys in their high school and what hair types they prefer. Those guys almost unanimously favored straight hair, and a very small number by comparison voted for what ranked 2nd - "slightly wavy." Some even wrote rude comments about why they dislike curly hair. "It looks like a nest" is the one that I remember. Is it any wonder why it can be so difficult to go natural?

So let's be real. People with "slightly wavy" hair don't have to overcome the same social stigma that curlier heads do. Of COURSE this site is for everyone, even the girl with the slightest wave. That is NOT what is being contested here. What is being contested is whether that type of hair is "curly" in the traditional sense. For the reasons I outlined above, I really don't believe it is. Those people should embrace their own category... they are wavies and should be proud of that in itself.
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