Newbie with confessions

Hello. I have type 3b hair, extra coarse and frizzy. I have always fought my hair texture... my mother has fine, straight hair and I want raised with good hair care for my "special needs" hair type. I am Caucasian and the budget-friendly Caucasian hair dressers didn't seem to know how to work with my hair or give good advice or products, so my hair was a frizzy bush much of the time because that's what would happen when I would use the standard shampoo and conditioner routine, and then brushed my hair when it was dry.

as a a pre teen I tried "straightening" products, low end grocery store flat irons, and had my hair chemically straightened and nothing seemed to make it bearsble. At the age of 14 I was so exasperated with my hair I shaved my head... not with clippers, with a few disposable razors. I pulled it off because I was very much in the goth scene at the time. soon after this I discovered the pricier flat irons and began using them at the full 400 degrees daily to get my hair straight. I was also bleaching and dyeing my hair, changing colors every few weeks. I stuck with short hair because it wouldn't grow more than about 6" because of the damage, and I didn't mind.

things are changing now. I still do not want long hair and I do not want the curls, but I want to improve the texture of my hair and keep it from getting as damaged. I do my hair at home alone because I cannot afford a hair dresser and I don't have anyone to help me. because of this, whether I color the back of my head I do the entire length of my hair since I can't do just the roots. in my current hairstyle is not too bad as the majority of my hair, except the bangs and front. is kept only 2 or 3 inches long

Are. right now when my dark roots get very noticeable I bleach the entire back and sides with 40 vol developer and then follow with a bright red dye in 20 vol developer. the front I am able to do just the roots as they grow, some of the hair is the same red color (bleached then dyed) and some is black (with 10 vol developer). I flat iron the front at 400 degrees about every other day. needless to say, my hair is brittle and dry, and a part of my bangs is much shorter than the rest due to breakage. I use selsun.blue shampoo a few times a week for dandruff followed by a salon conditioner and then salon leave in conditioner. I also use a repairing treatment a few times a week. I also use an ethnic hair gel for the short, curly parts of my hair.

I'm sick of my hair being fried. I'm here to learn ways to reduce damage to my hair and products to use to soften my hair. so yeah. that's my story and my current situation. I look forward to learning from you guys!
Hi there welcome to the forum..hope you have a good time here..so just enjoy and make your stay an enjoyable one out here at this community.
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The first thing you need to do is accept that you will always have some damage because of the way you want your hair to look--and that's OK. If you want your hair straight, there's nothing wrong with that, as long as you know you're not going to have virgin-level hair along with it.

Butters and oils don't moisturize. They can improve the feel and softness, so can be helpful in that regard. Coconut oil will penetrate the hair shaft, so for your hair would be more beneficial. You can get it just about anywhere--Trader Joe's has it, Walmart, most grocery stores, etc. I would do a heavy coconut oiling the night before a shampoo, and you can also use coconut oil to help mitigate the damage from bleaching (google for more information; there's lots out there).

Your hair is probably also high porosity due to bleaching and damage, so will lose moisture quickly and needs lot of protein. The repair treatments are good; there's a homemade alternative made with gelatin that would probably be cheaper and just as effective: Pedaheh's Hair Blog: Gelatin Protein Treatment. It should be followed by a moisturizing treatment (deep conditioning), which can be as simple as mixing regular conditioner with oils, honey, aloe vera, etc. depending on what your hair likes. This thread might help: The much-recommended SMT (Snowymoon's Moisture Treatment). Are you sure you actually have a scalp issue, or is it just dryness caused by your routine? Conventional dandruff shampoos can be pretty harsh, so switching to something gentler if you can would be a good idea, or even conditioner washing.

And finally, see if you can turn the heat down a bit. It will make a difference in the level of damage if you can get it down to 350 degrees rather than 400. Use heat protectant, too, of course!
3a/b, F, normal porosity

I've gotten my routine down to the bare essentials, finally
Wash: Suave Tropical Coconut
Leave-in: Suave Everlasting Sunshine, detangle with Denman brush
Gel: LAL Sport or Wet Look
Scrunch with flour sack towel, plop 10 minutes, air dry
Refresh with either plain water or Suave/water mix
Welcome!

Your routine is what is destroying both your skin and your hair - 40 vol peroxide is highly alkaline so horrible for both, cut back to maximum 20 volume and aim to only hit the roots not the lengths because repeat dying is one of the worst things you can do. All you need is an applicator brush, two mirrors, good lighting and some patience to do your own roots professionally. The lazy route is an applicator bottle with the tip snipped off, squirt a 'zig zag' of product into each part line and massage into your root area with gloved fingers - there is a little more overlap but it is faster.

If you are using a weaker persulphate bleach/ peroxide mix you have way more time to work slowly and methodically, you can even bleach hair in two sections/ two sessions so you have more flexibility with time. When you touch up your lengths there is no need to hit it with peroxide/ persulphate bleach, use a high pigment semi permanent colour like La Riche Directions or Manic Panic which is completely non damaging. With reds this actually lasts better than a permanent red as long as you care for your hair well when washing, and 'fades' bright instead of dull.

Unfortunately nothing can repair hair that is completely fried because hair is dead, all you can do is cut or grow out the damage and stop abusing your hair. Overnight coconut oil soaks on dry hair can help reduce porosity and increase elasticity, also bleaching right over the top of a heavy coconut oiling protects from some of the damage. Hydrolysed protein treatments are also valuable for patch repairing and temporarily strengthening, and again may protect against some of the bleach damage.

Are you using a heat protectant? Useful articles on heat styling
THE NATURAL HAVEN: Straightening Facts :How hot is too hot?
P&G Beauty & Grooming | Bubble Hair
http://www.hairfree.bz/Article.pdf
THE NATURAL HAVEN: Thermal protection: Do they really work?
How To Protect Your Hair From Heat Damage

If you have not already done so get your skin complaint diagnosed by your family doctor or a dermatologist, be sure you let them know you have been using 40 vol peroxide followed by 20 vol peroxide. Dandruff is often seborrhoeic dermatitis, but I suspect yours is partly or wholly down to you damaging the skin barrier/ protective acid mantle/ skin flora with your harsh routine (contact dermatitis). Do review your diet making it as anti inflammatory as possible and consider either a sulphate free shampoo at pH 4.5 to 5.5 or conditioner only washing depending on your diagnosis.

HTH!
2a-2c, medium texture, porous/ colour treated. Three years CG. Past bra strap length heading for waist.

CO-wash: Inecto coconut/ Elvive Volume Collagen
Treatments: Komaza Care Matani, coconut/ sweet almond/ fractionated coconut oils, Hairveda Sitrinillah
Leave in: Fructis Sleek & Shine (old), Gliss Ultimate Volume, various Elvive
Styler: Umberto Giannini jelly, Au Naturale styling gelee
Flour sack towel, pixie diffuse or air dry.
Experimenting with: benign neglect

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