Who put that tag on this thread? Weird!! It certainly was not me!!

Amneris, M2LR, RedCatWaves, CanItBeChristine and a few others....

I really took some time to reflect on your responses and I've had some time to simmer down since posting this thread. And I think most of you have figured out that I was pretty much jabbing my ex, not jabbing all parents.

We were in a biz meeting together with a group of other people the day before this thread. And he was talking loudly to a couple people about parenthood. He knows that I'm freaking about a/b my bio clock. Yet, he loudly said "mom's are special people" to a pregnant lady in the group" and another time he described how he video recorded his 2nd child being born (his favorite child) and how he and his 2nd wife finally decided on a name for his son. All of it just stung and hurt.

Here is a man who everyone thinks is sooo great of a father. And he paints a picture of his exW and himself being so perfect, but behind closed doors is a man who: bullies his 1st child, coddles his 5 year old, feeds them canned Raviolli or Mcdonalds DAILY, shows no patience with homework, and criticizes his 6 yo about something on a daily basis. The kids are never taken outside by him, he never throws a ball for them or takes them for bike rides, etc.

I am the one who used to take them outside and play with them. I am the one who bought them their first bikes/training wheels and was patient enough to teach them how to ride. I showed them how to hold a baseball bat, I cooked for them, even when it wasn't convenient for me. In fact, I even taught them some cooking basics. I made sure they always had clean, weather appropriate clothes on, I bought them a lot of clothes,, I played hide n seek every night, even though I was pretty after working 12 hours, took them to doctor appointments, taught them manners, etc.

How can he sit there and make jabs at me about parenthood and motherhood, when he and his ExW aren't such a great parents themselves. My sister and a few other "parents" do this to me as well. It's like they think they have a golden uterus....

Who put that tag on this thread? Weird!! It certainly was not me!!

Amneris, M2LR, RedCatWaves, CanItBeChristine and a few others....

I really took some time to reflect on your responses and I've had some time to simmer down since posting this thread. And I think most of you have figured out that I was pretty much jabbing my ex, not jabbing all parents.

We were in a biz meeting together with a group of other people the day before this thread. And he was talking loudly to a couple people about parenthood. He knows that I'm freaking about a/b my bio clock. Yet, he loudly said "mom's are special people" to a pregnant lady in the group" and another time he described how he video recorded his 2nd child being born (his favorite child) and how he and his 2nd wife finally decided on a name for his son. All of it just stung and hurt.

Here is a man who everyone thinks is sooo great of a father. And he paints a picture of his exW and himself being so perfect, but behind closed doors is a man who: bullies his 1st child, coddles his 5 year old, feeds them canned Raviolli or Mcdonalds DAILY, shows no patience with homework, and criticizes his 6 yo about something on a daily basis. The kids are never taken outside by him, he never throws a ball for them or takes them for bike rides, etc.

I am the one who used to take them outside and play with them. I am the one who bought them their first bikes/training wheels and was patient enough to teach them how to ride. I showed them how to hold a baseball bat, I cooked for them, even when it wasn't convenient for me. In fact, I even taught them some cooking basics. I made sure they always had clean, weather appropriate clothes on, I bought them a lot of clothes,, I played hide n seek every night, even though I was pretty after working 12 hours, took them to doctor appointments, taught them manners, etc.

How can he sit there and make jabs at me about parenthood and motherhood, when he and his ExW aren't such a great parents themselves. My sister and a few other "parents" do this to me as well. It's like they think they have a golden uterus....

What you're explaining there is the 'father of the year' syndrome. It often occurs with father's who have visitation, or less than full time custody of their children. They do the minimal amount, yet go around spouting off how important their kids are to them, how their doing this or that with them on the weekend, and bragging about how their such a super dad - when there's probably a mom, or grandmother, or some other woman who is buying their school clothes, helping them with their homework, taking care of them.while their sick, teaching them how to read........

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Amneris is black so having a bunch of kids is probably her #1 goal in life. She's real proud of herself 4 that. Way 2 go Amneris ~ fill up the world!

Amneris hey NetG is still waiting for an answer from u. She said she wants 2 take care of u forever. You'd think being a black woman you would jump on board. Of course since u prolly will have about 8 kids theres always welfare if u wanna quit work!

I think it occurs in society in general, whether or not the father is separated or in the kid's life or whatever. Even for fathers who are married or in committed relationships, they get way more credit and praise for being a hands-on parent than do mothers.

For example, if a dad takes his children to the park, or disciplines them by speaking firmly but kindly to them, or picks them up from school every day, a lot of people I know will say "Oh, isn't he a great dad?" But if I, or any other woman, do those things, no one says anything because "that's what you're supposed to do."

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I dont like seeing anyone or even believing in the idea of the right dude , which the idea I always had in my head it's not a recent thought from heart break, I just wanna be by myself and this seems to be pressuring cuz someday I'll think of having children..ugh

The idea that there is only one Mr. Right, or The One, is just nonsense. There are many people in the world that each of us could potentially be compatable with. Choosing a partner should mostly center around compatability, which should include sharing common future goals, like when/whether to have children. Sticking with a man who treats you badly, or who doesn't share your goals, because "you love him" and think he is The One, is dumb. Find someone else who does treat you well, and who shares your goals.