Are you better at communicating in writing or face-to-face?

The New Black · 07-07-2012, 11:40 AM

I'm better in writing. I'm naturally an introvert and it's hard for me express myself in person. I get nervous and tongue-tied, or thoughts leave my head completely and I don't know what to say. I'm pretty chatty in writing; face-to-face, not so much. You?

Oh, and I hate this new nc.com format! I hope it's temporary or maybe even a glitch...

The New Black · 07-07-2012, 11:47 AM

And by "communicating," I mean getting your point across; being understood or clear; being able to get your words out fluidly without stuttering/stammering or mental blocks; and/or, just feeling at ease saying whatever you have to say without being embarrassed, intimidated, etc.

But if you define communication differently, please share your definition too.

SarcasmIsBeauty · 07-07-2012, 11:55 AM

Writing, definitely. I hate talking, especially about my thoughts/feelings, writing is best. It's easier for me and I can get my point across.

PartyHair · 07-07-2012, 01:27 PM

I'm a good writer, and thanks to Toastmasters, I'm becoming a good speaker, both rehearsed and off the cuff

Fifi.G · 07-07-2012, 01:36 PM

I'd have to say neither or it depends on the person. I prefer writing but someone always misreads what I say. It's not that I don't get my point across but someone reads it as me being angry, snide, etc... when I'm no where near it. Last week I sent an email to my closest friend, telling him about something I was interested in and thought he might enjoy as well. He sent a reply saying, "Clam the ---- down!!". Okay. It was 2 well written paragraphs, full of facts about the subject, and I was nothing but calm. I've had that happen more times than I can count.

Worn out iPhone. Need I say more?

claudine19 · 07-07-2012, 04:00 PM

I like to stew over my words when I have something important to say, and maybe surprise myself as well. It's easier to do this in writing.

I can speak well with others, but I get distracted, or excited, or overwhelmed by details I observe but can't mention, like a client's perfect look.....except for his bitten-to-the -quick fingernails.

I also strongly dislike this format, btw.

CurlyCanadian · 07-07-2012, 05:05 PM

If it's a personal situation, I'm much better in person. For work though, I do better written.

My boss and I both run very hot sometimes, but he's terrible for cutting you off getting defensive. We've had a rough couple of months and I try to bring things up to him calmly, then wind up telling him to shut up and marching off till he can speak like an adult. I've started emailing him issues and it's seemed to help. We are both able to look at things in our own time, then it's more productive when we get together.

* I realise I sound like the child by marching off, but you need to know my boss

sleepymeko · 07-07-2012, 09:22 PM

It depends.

Simple conversations? I am good at both. But when I'm trying to express myself it's better in writing (such as express strong emotions: love, etc.).

I can use both to argue or to debate. I did find out that when I'm writing, it comes off as an "extreme" emotion (even when I'm not feeling very emotional which is why I think people here didn't like me much). In person I'm pretty calm because regardless of what it may seem like in my writing, I'm a person that doesn't really care about most things. I go with the flow. If there's a disagreement, I try to solve it calmly. I've discovered you get a lot more things done if you say things sternly and calmly.

luvmylocs · 07-07-2012, 10:02 PM

i can write what i feel clearly and i feel i can get my thoughts out without interruption, etc. BUT i feel in a relationship or marriage being able to talk is very important. i don't want to have to rely on writing letters to say what i want to say. plus if the other person isn't a writer or doesn't prefer that form of communication writing a letter and maybe expecting a reply in the same way isn't fair to put on the other person.

i'm really happy that with my current bf we have good communication. we talk about a lot of different things and when there's tension or upset feelings we talk about it in a kind and caring way which for me makes it easier to express "difficult" things. so for that i'm happy. we do occasionally say "important" things via text or email but 99% of the time we talk it out.

sew and sew · 07-07-2012, 11:57 PM

I went with 'other' because when it comes to interpersonal/relationship type stuff, I'm far better at communicating face-face or over the phone. Basically a situation where at least my tone comes through.

With intellectual (using the term loosely) or light and detached topics, writing has always been the way to go.

BlackAngelPlayah · 07-08-2012, 03:28 AM

In writing. I can write what I want. Even though when it comes to mushy stuff, my writing can come off a little corny.

😜🍸Sent LIVE from my JPhone 4s using some CurlTalk app. 😜🍸

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Starmie · 07-08-2012, 03:32 AM

I think I'm ok in both, though it can depend on the situation. Given the choice I'd much rather write, I've never been a natural talker.

legends · 07-08-2012, 11:34 AM

I don't think I'm all that good at face-to-face, but I'm much better at it than writing. My problem is that I'm a lazy writer, and I want to write as few words as possible to get my point across, so I take shortcuts.

LadyV69 · 07-08-2012, 11:40 AM

I'm way better at writing. I don't always think fast enough when I'm talking face to face with someone and I often think of things that I could have said hours after leaving them. With writing, I can take my time in order to get my point across.

alsaxon · 07-08-2012, 04:10 PM

Face to face! But I hate talking on the phone. I absolutely hate. I'd rather you text me and say let's get together. I hate the phone. It's an intrusion to me!

LAwoman · 07-10-2012, 03:39 AM

Writing.

But i don't think you'll find too many bulletin board "regulars" who would answer differently.

GuardianB · 07-11-2012, 09:50 AM

I'll say speaking if given the time and a small audience that I can continue thoughts, hear input or countering, and read expression and body language. I often find in writing that what I say is clear but I miss too many points that I would like to include but forget about in the moment. I'm long winded and trying to concise EVERYTHING, seems to be too difficult.

sarah42 · 07-11-2012, 11:01 AM

Writing, though I've gotten better and more confident with speaking face-to-face in the past several years.

With writing, especially personal emails where I have strong emotions about something, I tend to get too wordy and over-explain myself. I try to work on getting my point across concisely.

SaraNoH · 07-11-2012, 11:04 AM

This is interesting because I'd say I'm a very strong writer, but when it comes to communicating to someone else via written word I can get jumbled. Face-to-face it is for me, since you can explain what you're trying to say in much more depth than in 140 characters etc.