Report her or not?

Like Tree73Likes

I used to get a monthly massage at Massage Envy and it came right out of my FSA. The massages were only adequate, but there was one woman who was pretty good. The problem with her was that she simply wouldn't shut up. And she always talked about how good she was. Like, if she'd find a spot that was sore on me and I'd say, "Yeah, that's been hurting for days," she'd say, "I know. I could tell just by the way you walked when you came in. My fingers know. I can just tell. Stick with me, kid, I'll fix you up. See, a lot of people don't realize that..." and she'd go on and on. And I'd try not to respond just to shut her up but it didn't help. and she'd also talk about her cat all the time.

Anyway, eventually I stopped going to Massage Envy. Mainly because she really was the only person who gave a better-than-adequate massage and I didn't like her.

Yesterday I got an email from her.
hello jess,
how are you doing ? I am fine.. It has been awhile. I hope everything is fine.. Zelda is getting big.. here is the latest of her birthday is Saturday.. i hope you don't mean me email you ... would like to hear from you again..
Then she enclosed a bunch of cat pictures.

I never gave her my email, so I assume that means she went into my files at Massage Envy and found it. She's nice and a little quirky but I don't like that at all.

Would you report her or just not answer her and let it go?


Obamacare is not a blueprint for socialism. You're thinking of the New Testament. ~~ John Fugelsang



I would report her. That's a complete invasion of privacy and, in my opinion, way over the line.
NetG and Wiregirl like this.
I would ignore it and her. She sounds weird but harmless.

Anything more, though, and I might say something directly to her, such as, "I'm no longer a client so please refrain from contacting me in future."

Dogs and nature abhor a vacuum.
http://geaugadoggy.wordpress.com
I would talk to her directly before I mentioned it to anyone else. Some people are just clueless but are good at their job and mean well. I try to give everyone the benefit of the doubt before complaining to their supervisors...unless it was some egregious thing.
3b (with 3c tendencies) on modified CG

I would ignore it and her. She sounds weird but harmless.

Anything more, though, and I might say something directly to her, such as, "I'm no longer a client so please refrain from contacting me in future."
Originally Posted by claudine19
I would talk to her directly before I mentioned it to anyone else. Some people are just clueless but are good at their job and mean well. I try to give everyone the benefit of the doubt before complaining to their supervisors...unless it was some egregious thing.
Originally Posted by spiderlashes5000
I agree with both of these!
I believe in manicures. I believe in overdressing. I believe in primping at leisure and wearing lipstick. I believe in pink. I believe that laughing is the best calorie burner. I believe in kissing, kissing a lot. I believe in being strong when everything seems to be going wrong. I believe that happy girls are the prettiest girls. I believe that tomorrow is another day and I believe in miracles.
Audrey Hepburn
Pictures of her cat's birthday who is "getting big"? I would have assumed Zelda was a child or grandchild.

For something like that, I don't know if I'd report her. If she's generally a nice person, I'd feel bad at potentially getting her fired or whatever. I'd just write back and gently let her know it was wrong for her to access your e-mail and you would be within your rights to report her(so she knows not to do it in the future) and ask her not to contact you anymore.
Get used to me. Black, confident, cocky; my name, not yours; my religion, not yours; my goals, my own; get used to me. -Muhammad Ali











It's kind of odd. Usually places send me general emails to get me to come back, as in "we haven't seen you in awhile, stop in for our special promotions this week, blah, blah, blah." This is a personal email, so she did cross a professional line. She is guilty of having poor boundaries but I would feel bad if she were to get fired over my complaint. Could it be a cultural thing?

If it were me, I'd tell her how I felt first, offer her some friendly advice about not to crossing the line with other customers, then I'd block her.
Pictures of her cat's birthday who is "getting big"? I would have assumed Zelda was a child or grandchild.

For something like that, I don't know if I'd report her. If she's generally a nice person, I'd feel bad at potentially getting her fired or whatever. I'd just write back and gently let her know it was wrong for her to access your e-mail and you would be within your rights to report her(so she knows not to do it in the future) and ask her not to contact you anymore.
Originally Posted by Amneris
I agree with you. You posted while I was writing out my post! I should have hit preview before posting.
Amneris likes this.
See, it would bother me a lot. This is someone touching you in ways most people don't at levels of undress most people don't see. And she is invading your privacy - to me that's a boundary crossing which is an issue for ALL her clients, if she thinks it's acceptable to do that. I would report her, personally.
Wiregirl likes this.
The pews never miss a sermon but that doesn't get them one step closer to Heaven.
-Speckla

But at least the pews never attend yoga!
See, it would bother me a lot. This is someone touching you in ways most people don't at levels of undress most people don't see. And she is invading your privacy - to me that's a boundary crossing which is an issue for ALL her clients, if she thinks it's acceptable to do that. I would report her, personally.
Originally Posted by NetG
But that's her job and it was done consentually and, I'm assuming, appropriately. Why is that relevent?
Amneris, murrrcat and sleepymeko like this.
3b (with 3c tendencies) on modified CG

See, it would bother me a lot. This is someone touching you in ways most people don't at levels of undress most people don't see. And she is invading your privacy - to me that's a boundary crossing which is an issue for ALL her clients, if she thinks it's acceptable to do that. I would report her, personally.
Originally Posted by NetG
But that's her job and it was done consentually and, I'm assuming, appropriately. Why is that relevent?
Originally Posted by spiderlashes5000
Because she overstepped boundaries of what was supposed to be a professional relationship by stealing her email from company files without her permission to use it for non-professional purposes. Crossing that line is specifically why I would be very bothered by it.
Wiregirl and MotorCurl like this.
The pews never miss a sermon but that doesn't get them one step closer to Heaven.
-Speckla

But at least the pews never attend yoga!
If she doesn't know it's inappropriate to send personal emails to a customer (presumably by going through your files to locate your email address), then her boss needs to know his employee lacks judgment skills/boundaries and is a slight nutter. But you can say it in a way that expresses concern and is meant to inform him/her of an issue before it worsens, rather than just blasting her.
scrills, eche428 and murrrcat like this.
No MAS.

I am the new Black.

"Hope the Mail are saving space tomorrow for Samantha Brick's reaction piece on the reactions to her piece about the reactions to her piece." ~ Tweet reposted by Rou.

http://www.youtube.com/user/Kimshi4242

http://www.tumblr.com/blog/kimshi4242
See, it would bother me a lot. This is someone touching you in ways most people don't at levels of undress most people don't see. And she is invading your privacy - to me that's a boundary crossing which is an issue for ALL her clients, if she thinks it's acceptable to do that. I would report her, personally.
Originally Posted by NetG
But that's her job and it was done consentually and, I'm assuming, appropriately. Why is that relevent?
Originally Posted by spiderlashes5000
Because she overstepped boundaries of what was supposed to be a professional relationship by stealing her email from company files without her permission to use it for non-professional purposes. Crossing that line is specifically why I would be very bothered by it.
Originally Posted by NetG
But why is the fact that Springcurl was undressed during the massages have any relevence or make the email-stealing worse? Are you thinking there was something sexual in the massage therapist's motivation?
Amneris and murrrcat like this.
3b (with 3c tendencies) on modified CG

Maybe Net's saying that getting a massage requires you to become somewhat vulnerable, at least more so than with other industries that provide you a service. Therefore, a masseuse should be even more diligent in making a customer feel comfortable and secure. The masseuse in SC's case didn't make her feel secure at all.
No MAS.

I am the new Black.

"Hope the Mail are saving space tomorrow for Samantha Brick's reaction piece on the reactions to her piece about the reactions to her piece." ~ Tweet reposted by Rou.

http://www.youtube.com/user/Kimshi4242

http://www.tumblr.com/blog/kimshi4242
Maybe Net's saying that getting a massage requires you to become somewhat vulnerable, at least more so than with other industries that provide you a service. Therefore, a masseuse should be even more diligent in making a customer feel comfortable and secure. The masseuse in SC's case didn't make her feel secure at all.
Originally Posted by The New Black
Thanks for putting it better than I could find the words to. That's it exactly - if Burger King had a "frequent diner" club they emailed and an employee had been super chatty then grabbed her email from it that wouldn't seem as big a violation because of the less vulnerable relationship you have with your BK cashier. (And I used that as an example because it was the service industry I worked in, not because I think it's especially related over other options.)
The New Black likes this.
The pews never miss a sermon but that doesn't get them one step closer to Heaven.
-Speckla

But at least the pews never attend yoga!
Maybe Net's saying that getting a massage requires you to become somewhat vulnerable, at least more so than with other industries that provide you a service. Therefore, a masseuse should be even more diligent in making a customer feel comfortable and secure. The masseuse in SC's case didn't make her feel secure at all.
Originally Posted by The New Black
IMO that's unfair.

I think the therapist probably did think she was making Spring feel comfortabe and secure by going out of her way to extend friendship (however nutty it was).

In every massage situation I've been in, I was told to "disrobe to my level of comfort." If you (gy) are uncomfortable w/ nudity, you (gy) should wear lightweight clothing or get them at a chiro or PT office, if medically necessary.

I don't think it's reasonable to punish someone excessively for a smallish infraction bc that person felt unduly vulnerable in a situation.

(Not saying this was NetG's experience but...)
scrills, Amneris, murrrcat and 1 others like this.
3b (with 3c tendencies) on modified CG

I think the woman is just a little different, and this was her way of 'checking ain't on you since you haven't been in a while.

Its a message therapist. Its not like looking up personal medical files. I'm pretty sure if she was the person doing the treatment she'd be looking at your information. Maybe she was trying to 'lure' you back.

I mean, you did give out your email info. You'd expect some sort of correspondence.

I do think its totally creepy though. I probably would ignore it and hope it went away.

Sent from my SAMSUNG-SGH-I997 using CurlTalk App
I think the woman is just a little different, and this was her way of 'checking ain't on you since you haven't been in a while.

Its a message therapist. Its not like looking up personal medical files. I'm pretty sure if she was the person doing the treatment she'd be looking at your information. Maybe she was trying to 'lure' you back.

App
Originally Posted by iroc
i think the masseuse needs a message therapist

shes annoying but i wouldnt report her for that. she is your masseuse is she not allowed access to your personal account?
The New Black and murrrcat like this.

Last edited by OBB; 08-17-2012 at 03:25 PM.
At first I was going to say just ignore her, but once you mentioned the email... LOL. Talk to her IMHO. Tell her that was inappropriate and you're a customer, not her friend.
murrrcat likes this.
Check out my personal blog




I think the woman is just a little different, and this was her way of 'checking ain't on you since you haven't been in a while.

Its a message therapist. Its not like looking up personal medical files. I'm pretty sure if she was the person doing the treatment she'd be looking at your information. Maybe she was trying to 'lure' you back.

I mean, you did give out your email info. You'd expect some sort of correspondence.

I do think its totally creepy though. I probably would ignore it and hope it went away.

Sent from my SAMSUNG-SGH-I997 using CurlTalk App
Originally Posted by iroc

I've gone to Massage Envy a few times and never received any emails (but I never bought the yearly plan).

However, I went to another massage therapist and I am now on her listserv and she emails me monthly.

And another massage therapist even ocasional will leave voicemails on my phone when she's having some kind of event.

The cat thing is weird, true. But aren't you a cat person, Spring? Maybe you mentioned that to her and she thought it was a topic you could relate to each other on?
3b (with 3c tendencies) on modified CG

Trending Topics


Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On



All times are GMT -6. The time now is 01:04 AM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2014, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Copyright 2011 NaturallyCurly.com