PDA when hanging with friends....?

Like Tree33Likes

What's your opinion on public displays of affection (kissing, hugging etc) when couples are hanging out in a group? Or even just with one or two other people?

At the moment I am almost the only single person in our circle of friends, so whenever I am hanging out it is usually with one or more couples. I try to be open-minded because I don't want to come off as the bitter single lady, but it doesn't help that I'm kind of a prude about these things in the first place - when I am dating, I'm not a fan of PDA myself. So it does annoy me when my friends start to make out, or do that couple-y snuggling thing while I stand awkwardly to the side like....should I go, do you two need a moment?? I rarely say anything though.

What do you think - am I being overly judgmental? Or is this rude? Where's the line?

I'm not very physically affectionate so I accept my judgement may be off here.....


4a?? Maybe 3c...some 4b??? No clue

tiny s-waves, coils, and spirals


- Cleanser: CJ Daily Fix or KC Come Clean
- Co-wash: Suave Naturals or V05
- RO: GVP Conditioning Balm or Tresemme Naturals
-Stylers: Garnier Pure Clean Gel, CJ Aloe Fix, KCCC


"I remember your childhood hair....flowin' wild at the county fair" - kelley stoltz

"and all the hours that you've been sitting at your vanity....may they carry you far from your misery" - conor oberst
Get a room!
thelio and triple_spiral like this.
3b (with 3c tendencies) on modified CG

It's kind of rude if you're the one single person. It's hard to say completely, though, since you admit that you just don't like PDA. So, your friends might not be out of line so much as you're holding them to your standards.
In any case, I'd generally prefer to invite just friends rather than couples to hang out. I mean, I'm sure there are times when your friends do their own thing, separate from their partners. So that seems to me the perfect opportunity.
triple_spiral likes this.
I hate that!

That's that shhh I don't like!!!


It's so awkward, like you're all over each other and then trying ot talk to me? NO don't talk to me when your boo thang is making out with your neck uggggh



I'm not big on pda either.

Holding hands okay, arm around each other okay, kissing like once twice small pecks okay, but constantly groping and stuff. UGH.

It's so weird.


Get a life.
There are just some activities that are physically intimate and designed to get the two people sexually aroused. Toungue kissing, crotch grabbing, butt rubbing, prolonged hugging, etc. Why do that in public?

Holding hands or a quick peck on the lips to say goodbye or something is fine, tho IMO.
geeky, nynaeve77 and thelio like this.
3b (with 3c tendencies) on modified CG

yea I don't care about those simple things, I don't really count it as pda..but I guess it is. I haven't been out with a couple in so long, until the other week. and the guy would not get off the girl. Every five seconds he would be like rubbing her, kissing her, not like pecks like kisses you should only do in the privacy of your home, LIKE WE'RE walking outside, and you're dragging everybody behind because you two are waddling because you can't get off each other.
He wanted the biscuit bad.

That's my only reasoning behind people who pretty much dry hump in public. They want sex. Like go have sex somewhere jeez. Get ur shh together.

like once I was at a concert and this guy was all over his girlfriend like dry humping the shhh out of her. But she was just casually standing there, like he wasn't there. They def were not drunk. I could not stop staring because it was hilarious and awkward. Everyone was staring.
Hand holding, a brief hug, or a quick kiss are all fine. Making out in public is just weird, though. It's awkward to be around.
LAwoman and murrrcat like this.
"Maybe Lucy's right. Of all the Charlie Browns in the world, you're the Charlie Browniest."--Linus, A Charlie Brown Christmas
-----------------------------------------------
My fotki: http://public.fotki.com/nynaeve77/
Password: orphanannie
It's kind of rude if you're the one single person. It's hard to say completely, though, since you admit that you just don't like PDA. So, your friends might not be out of line so much as you're holding them to your standards.
In any case, I'd generally prefer to invite just friends rather than couples to hang out. I mean, I'm sure there are times when your friends do their own thing, separate from their partners. So that seems to me the perfect opportunity.
Originally Posted by Saria
Yeah, the bolded is why I don't really say anything....to be more specific, I think hand-holding, quick pecks/kisses, and the occasional touch (like rubbing an SO's arm or something) is fine. The things that bother me are more:

-Making out, or alot of kissing (like a a dozen or more "little" kisses all in a row so it's basically the same as a make-out session only "cutesy" instead of "sexy"....still annoying, guys

- Butt slapping or any "intimate" touching

- When they do that cutesy back-and-forth, teasing thing.... like play-fighting and talking in silly voices. Not sure if I'm explaining what I mean, but this happens a lot and it's like they zero in on each other and I may as well not even be in the room.....one time I started reading a book I was so bored.


4a?? Maybe 3c...some 4b??? No clue

tiny s-waves, coils, and spirals


- Cleanser: CJ Daily Fix or KC Come Clean
- Co-wash: Suave Naturals or V05
- RO: GVP Conditioning Balm or Tresemme Naturals
-Stylers: Garnier Pure Clean Gel, CJ Aloe Fix, KCCC


"I remember your childhood hair....flowin' wild at the county fair" - kelley stoltz

"and all the hours that you've been sitting at your vanity....may they carry you far from your misery" - conor oberst
yea I don't care about those simple things, I don't really count it as pda..but I guess it is. I haven't been out with a couple in so long, until the other week. and the guy would not get off the girl. Every five seconds he would be like rubbing her, kissing her, not like pecks like kisses you should only do in the privacy of your home, LIKE WE'RE walking outside, and you're dragging everybody behind because you two are waddling because you can't get off each other.
He wanted the biscuit bad.

That's my only reasoning behind people who pretty much dry hump in public. They want sex. Like go have sex somewhere jeez. Get ur shh together.

like once I was at a concert and this guy was all over his girlfriend like dry humping the shhh out of her. But she was just casually standing there, like he wasn't there. They def were not drunk. I could not stop staring because it was hilarious and awkward. Everyone was staring.
Originally Posted by murrrcat
YES your example about your friend is exactly what I mean.....I'm not even offended by the PDA so much as I'm just BORED, like I didn't invite your over so I could be ignored.....I would hate to think that my awesome friends suddenly become boring when they couple up but that's kind of how it feels sometimes - all of a sudden their S/O is the only person that matters. Maybe that's the way it SHOULD be though, IDK, I've never been in love, only dated for fun, so who knows?


4a?? Maybe 3c...some 4b??? No clue

tiny s-waves, coils, and spirals


- Cleanser: CJ Daily Fix or KC Come Clean
- Co-wash: Suave Naturals or V05
- RO: GVP Conditioning Balm or Tresemme Naturals
-Stylers: Garnier Pure Clean Gel, CJ Aloe Fix, KCCC


"I remember your childhood hair....flowin' wild at the county fair" - kelley stoltz

"and all the hours that you've been sitting at your vanity....may they carry you far from your misery" - conor oberst
Awkward indeed!!! All you can really do is tell people how you feel about it.

Being passive aggressive solves nothing. A good stank eye and loud coughs can help break the tension, pair it will how uncomfortable it makes you and only the most inconsiderate of people will continue.
It's annoying but lately I've been doing it. It's definitely rude if you're the only person there without anyone else to talk to and a couple ignores you, regardless of PDA or not.
Awkward indeed!!! All you can really do is tell people how you feel about it.

Being passive aggressive solves nothing. A good stank eye and loud coughs can help break the tension, pair it will how uncomfortable it makes you and only the most inconsiderate of people will continue.
Originally Posted by Nej
This is probably really good advice....I would just hate to be That Girl, that when I show up a couple thinks "Oh Triple is here and she's all alone, I guess we're not allowed to kiss now..."

I'm probably being paranoid. I will try to drop some hints next time it happens and see how it goes.....


4a?? Maybe 3c...some 4b??? No clue

tiny s-waves, coils, and spirals


- Cleanser: CJ Daily Fix or KC Come Clean
- Co-wash: Suave Naturals or V05
- RO: GVP Conditioning Balm or Tresemme Naturals
-Stylers: Garnier Pure Clean Gel, CJ Aloe Fix, KCCC


"I remember your childhood hair....flowin' wild at the county fair" - kelley stoltz

"and all the hours that you've been sitting at your vanity....may they carry you far from your misery" - conor oberst
i remember my cousin started doing that when she got with her current bf. Once we were on the bus stop when he laid on the grass and pulled her on top of him. i swear i thought they would start having sex right there. i was so embarrassed. everyone was staring and some older ladies said, "she has no repect for herself". I pretended I wasnt with them.

I felt it was rude and disrepectful to everyone there. We begin to hang out less often after that.
I think there is a difference between public displays of affection and public displays of sexual intimacy. Former is OK (holding hands, regular hugs, quick kiss or pat), latter is not. If you are really so hot for each other that you can't refrain from dry-humping or shoving your tongues down each other's throats for 10 minutes, then don't leave your house.
If the stuff that you are doing makes your naughty bits tingly, then you should do it in private. Because the rest of the world would rather not think about your naught bits all the time, thank you very much.
To Trenell, MizKerri and geeky:
I pray none of you ever has to live in a communist state.

Geeky is my hero. She's the true badass. The badass who doesn't even need to be a badass. There aren't enough O's in cool to describe her.
It's kind of rude if you're the one single person. It's hard to say completely, though, since you admit that you just don't like PDA. So, your friends might not be out of line so much as you're holding them to your standards.
In any case, I'd generally prefer to invite just friends rather than couples to hang out. I mean, I'm sure there are times when your friends do their own thing, separate from their partners. So that seems to me the perfect opportunity.
Originally Posted by Saria
Yeah, the bolded is why I don't really say anything....to be more specific, I think hand-holding, quick pecks/kisses, and the occasional touch (like rubbing an SO's arm or something) is fine. The things that bother me are more:

-Making out, or alot of kissing (like a a dozen or more "little" kisses all in a row so it's basically the same as a make-out session only "cutesy" instead of "sexy"....still annoying, guys

- Butt slapping or any "intimate" touching

- When they do that cutesy back-and-forth, teasing thing.... like play-fighting and talking in silly voices. Not sure if I'm explaining what I mean, but this happens a lot and it's like they zero in on each other and I may as well not even be in the room.....one time I started reading a book I was so bored.
Originally Posted by triple_spiral
I'm sorry but I burst out laughing when I read that

ITA with what's been said.

There was this couple of the train that were bugging the crap out of me yesterday. Like my train home from work is my quiet time,I like to read or snooze. I don't not want to listen to your slurpy kissing noises. And they WOULD NOT STOP!!! I was like cant you just wait until you get home because it is grossing me out and distracting me from my book!

Of course I didn't say anything because I figured I'd look like a lunatic.
oh I've been there in high school.

Here's what you do. Stop hanging out with your friend if she's bringing her boyfriend.


Sometimes ladygirls get all in lust or lurve with their boo that they forget to spend time with their friends and they just toss 'em to the side. When you get tossed, just stay tossed. Eventually they'll realize they only have their boyfriend and if they're happy that way. Good for them.


if she's like how come you don't want to hang out with me?

be like "well you won't get off your bf's dick for freaking five seconds so I'm not trying to be around that" and then end of subject.

You don't have to say it like that but you know.
Josephine, Saria, Nallia and 2 others like this.
Depends a bit on the environment. Definitely not dry humping, but a bit of making out, as long as not too hoochy, in a busier environment, like a nightclub or concert, is okay as far as I am concerned. People are often hooking up for the first time in those situations, and if it were me, I would not want to settle for a peck or holding hands.

But not if they are accompanied by just one or two other people. Either they should be alone, or the people they are with form a group large enough that the two can just go to a separate corner.

P.S. I used to live with my sister. When she and her (now) husband first started dating...awkard, yes. But what was I to do? Tell her to not make out with her bf in her own home? And they are loud kissers. I just got over it, but it's nice that we're all past that phase.
Josephine likes this.

Last edited by Dedachan; 11-08-2012 at 02:00 PM. Reason: added last paragraph
Depends a bit on the environment. Definitely not dry humping, but a bit of making out, as long as not too hoochy, in a busier environment, like a nightclub or concert, is okay as far as I am concerned. People are often hooking up for the first time in those situations, and if it were me, I would not want to settle for a peck or holding hands.

But not if they are accompanied by just one or two other people. Either they should be alone, or the people they are with form a group large enough that the two can just go to a separate corner.

P.S. I used to live with my sister. When she and her (now) husband first started dating...awkard, yes. But what was I to do? Tell her to not make out with her bf in her own home? And they are loud kissers. I just got over it, but it's nice that we're all past that phase.
Originally Posted by Dedachan
What do you mean by the bolded?
3b (with 3c tendencies) on modified CG

It doesn't bother me unless they're over doing it. My S/O and I do the whole pda thing, but we know our limits and if we're in a group we try to make sure that we don't make anyone uncomfortable or singled out and if we know there's that one uptight person we'll just go off away from them to avoid any issues, that is unless we just don't like you then we'll purposely do stuff just to annoy you and not care lol Anyways other than that we're considerate and also don't do all of that in front of children like I see some people doing ughhh.

http://www.naturallycurly.com/curlta...ily-world.html

http://www.naturallycurly.com/curlta...ve-styles.html
Depends a bit on the environment. Definitely not dry humping, but a bit of making out, as long as not too hoochy, in a busier environment, like a nightclub or concert, is okay as far as I am concerned. People are often hooking up for the first time in those situations, and if it were me, I would not want to settle for a peck or holding hands.

But not if they are accompanied by just one or two other people. Either they should be alone, or the people they are with form a group large enough that the two can just go to a separate corner.

P.S. I used to live with my sister. When she and her (now) husband first started dating...awkard, yes. But what was I to do? Tell her to not make out with her bf in her own home? And they are loud kissers. I just got over it, but it's nice that we're all past that phase.
Originally Posted by Dedachan
What do you mean by the bolded?
Originally Posted by spiderlashes5000
Well, I'm not Dedachan, but the bolded was essentially what I was going to say (mainly because I'm now feeling bad about my behavior in public...). If I'm on a first, second, or third date with someone, and I want to kiss them goodbye, I'm not likely to ask them to come over so as not to subject strangers to our kissing. I've been known to make out in front of a subway stop.

Apologies to anyone who's seen me on the street and been offended!

ETA: I wouldn't make out in front of friends, though! If I'm at the point where I'm spending time with a man and a friend, he's probably my boyfriend. I generally don't do PDA with boyfriends because you can get a room.
In search of a lost signature...

Last edited by ursula; 11-08-2012 at 02:54 PM.

Trending Topics


Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On



All times are GMT -6. The time now is 04:34 AM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2014, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Copyright 2011 NaturallyCurly.com