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Old 02-08-2007, 09:10 AM   #1
 
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Default Is it Feb. 15, yet?

Ugh. I'm on the verge of tearing my hair out. I know it's a stupid Hallmark holiday. I know being without an SO or tons of dates doesn't make you a loser. I also know that everywhere I'm turning since the beginning of the year there seems to be some sort of ad campaign or event that's designed to make you think that if you're not with someone you're crap. I actually received a happy hour invite from Planned Parenthood for February 15 that's billing itself as a place to meet someone if you didn't/don't have a Valentine.

I'm going to boycott it out of principle. Plus, what kinds of single men show up at a Planned Parenthood event anyway? Married ones and sensitive, ponytail men, that's who. Blech.

Carry on. I'm probably bitter b/c I got dumped hard almost 2 years ago and frankly, the thought of actually dating made me want to throw up until relatively recently. I'm pretty low on the trust-o-meter right now.
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Old 02-08-2007, 09:20 AM   #2
 
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Next thursday. Next thursday. I'm not a valentines day lover either. I wanted to barf earlier as a coworker was cooing over the engraved dog tag necklace she got her new BF. From Tiffany's.
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Old 02-08-2007, 09:27 AM   #3
 
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I've never been a big fan of Valentine's Day either. It seems so manufactured to me. Although I do like all the cute pink and red heart stuff.

Discgirl, I'm sorry you've been having a rough time.
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Old 02-08-2007, 09:36 AM   #4
 
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I'm not a huge Valentine's Day fan either. I always get the kids some candy and I just bought my husband a very non-romantic card. And that will be about it from me this year!
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Old 02-08-2007, 09:38 AM   #5
 
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First, it's tacky for her to say where she bought it just to say she bought it at Tiffany's. You can tell her, I raise my (self-purchased) Tiffany ring wearing middle finger to her tackiness.

Iris -- Thanks. I'm fine. It just gets to be really hard to be a 1 in world that seems completely populated by or designed for 2s. It ain't easy sometimes being a swingle in your early 40's. Of course, it's no easier being a 2in your early 40's either.
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Old 02-08-2007, 09:42 AM   #6
 
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Are people so obssessed with this day? They're already buying presents and showing them?! The good thing about Valentine's here is that many don't belive in it and I can talk about how stupid it is and many will agree with me. Just tell yourself that evryone who's obssessed with Valentine's day don't get any love in their lives and can't wait for Valentine's so that someone canromance them.
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Old 02-08-2007, 09:44 AM   #7
 
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I can't stand Valentine's Day. It seems so forced. I made the mistake when my kids were little of getting them a little something for Valentines rather than candy. It was cute...a little stuffed toy or something, then when they got to be adolescents, I gave them a music CD or video game. NOW, my older boys expect a big gift as if it's christmas or something. One asked for a new laptop. After I stopped laughing, I said, "Um...I don't think so."

I think I'll get them candy. Eff the teeth...
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Old 02-08-2007, 09:45 AM   #8
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Discgirl
First, it's tacky for her to say where she bought it just to say she bought it at Tiffany's. You can tell her, I raise my (self-purchased) Tiffany ring wearing middle finger to her tackiness.

Iris -- Thanks. I'm fine. It just gets to be really hard to be a 1 in world that seems completely populated by or designed for 2s. It ain't easy sometimes being a swingle in your early 40's. Of course, it's no easier being a 2in your early 40's either.
I think the grass always seems greener at times. Generally I am very happy to be married and having a baby still in my 20's, and I know many people would love that, but I have occasional flashes of regret when I talk to some of my single friends who are able to pursue goals, travel, go out, date, spend money frivolously, etc. seemingly without a care and not having to justify anything they do to anyone. It probably isn't really that way, and I know my unmarried days were not necessarily easy, but some days I get so nostalgic for them! I think we all wonder about the road less travelled or what it would be like if we were only xxxxxxx instead, but when it comes down to it, we are where we are in life and can only make the best of it.
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Old 02-08-2007, 09:50 AM   #9
 
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Quote:
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[
I think the grass always seems greener at times. Generally I am very happy to be married and having a baby still in my 20's, and I know many people would love that, but I have occasional flashes of regret when I talk to some of my single friends who are able to pursue goals, travel, go out, date, spend money frivolously, etc. seemingly without a care and not having to justify anything they do to anyone. It probably isn't really that way, and I know my unmarried days were not necessarily easy, but some days I get so nostalgic for them! I think we all wonder about the road less travelled or what it would be like if we were only xxxxxxx instead, but when it comes down to it, we are where we are in life and can only make the best of it.
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Old 02-08-2007, 09:52 AM   #10
 
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Default Re: Is it Feb. 15, yet?

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Originally Posted by Discgirl
Plus, what kinds of single men show up at a Planned Parenthood event anyway? Married ones and sensitive, ponytail men, that's who.
That made me laugh. Did you see Singles? Kyra Sedgwick's character had a ponytail boyfriend who was oh so sensitive, yet boring. Good movie. Rent it, if you haven't seen it.

February 15th will be here soon. Hang tough.
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Old 02-08-2007, 09:56 AM   #11
 
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Originally Posted by Discgirl
First, it's tacky for her to say where she bought it just to say she bought it at Tiffany's. You can tell her, I raise my (self-purchased) Tiffany ring wearing middle finger to her tackiness.
I will do that.

In actuality I mustered out a "errr... nice" and told her I was busy.

Another one of my friends is absolutely inconsolable because she has jury duty on Valentines Day. Ugh.
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Old 02-08-2007, 09:56 AM   #12
 
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I can't be the only one who thinks that Singles Night at Planned Parenthood is at the very least really, really weird.

I do not get the obsession with holidays and having to spend beaucoup bux. It's just ridiculous.
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Old 02-08-2007, 09:56 AM   #13
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Default Re: Is it Feb. 15, yet?

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Discgirl
Plus, what kinds of single men show up at a Planned Parenthood event anyway? Married ones and sensitive, ponytail men, that's who.
That made me laugh. Did you see Singles? Kyra Sedgwick's character had a ponytail boyfriend who was oh so sensitive, yet boring. Good movie. Rent it, if you haven't seen it.

February 15th will be here soon. Hang tough.
That made me chuckle, too...
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Old 02-08-2007, 10:00 AM   #14
 
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That's where I plucked that line from. It's very true, although scary. That movie makes me laugh buckets. Citizen Dick. Hah.

I hear you Amneris. I decided to go to Peru last summer and more or less just picked up and went. I didn't have to consult with anyone about money or when I was going or what I planned to do once I got there. I was able to do the same when I went to Alaska. The freedom to do that is a wonderful thing. Trust me. I value it. It just gets to me sometimes that society's message is that somehow I'm a failure b/c I'm not a "2." I actually had someone ask me "When are you going to settle down? Don't you want children?" I responded that I wanted children very much, but am physically incapable of having them and always have been. (Honestly, I don't know if I can or can't b/c it's not something I've ever checked into.) I know that was mean of me, but I figured he had it coming.
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Old 02-08-2007, 10:49 AM   #15
 
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I'm terribly excited for February 15... I'm getting the keys to my new place that day!

I am a closet romantic (ssh!), but Valentine's Day is so not even on my radar. I don't buy into it, but I don't have any rage about it either. Heartsyfartsy silliness.
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Old 02-08-2007, 10:50 AM   #16
 
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I know. If PP wants to be able to counter the people who are saying its adding to the decline of civilization, I don't think they should host events designed to raise money by putting booze filled adults together. Are they planning to have candy dishes full of contraceptives? I just think it's weird.
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Old 02-08-2007, 11:20 AM   #17
 
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I think it's all a matter of attitude. I'm not dating anyone and the Valentine's stuff doesn't bother me at all. Who cares that I'm single?? Big deal...it will be just like any other day to me because I'm not focused on the fact that I'm single. I am where I am in life and I'm content. If someone special comes along, fine. If no one comes along for a while, that's fine too. I don't think it's a big deal at all to be single on Valentine's day.
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Old 02-08-2007, 11:33 AM   #18
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Discgirl
That's where I plucked that line from. It's very true, although scary. That movie makes me laugh buckets. Citizen Dick. Hah.

I hear you Amneris. I decided to go to Peru last summer and more or less just picked up and went. I didn't have to consult with anyone about money or when I was going or what I planned to do once I got there. I was able to do the same when I went to Alaska. The freedom to do that is a wonderful thing. Trust me. I value it. It just gets to me sometimes that society's message is that somehow I'm a failure b/c I'm not a "2." I actually had someone ask me "When are you going to settle down? Don't you want children?" I responded that I wanted children very much, but am physically incapable of having them and always have been. (Honestly, I don't know if I can or can't b/c it's not something I've ever checked into.) I know that was mean of me, but I figured he had it coming.
Aww, please don't let it get to you. A lot of people have to live by molds instead of doing what makes them happy and just cant think outside their box that they were told they need to live in. It sucks that people just can't accept differences. Vday is really for those couples that are not really couples but need an excuse to do something special since they don't normally.
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Old 02-08-2007, 11:48 AM   #19
 
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I guess it's probably getting to me more than usual b/c I stumbled across the necklace former dude gave to me for V-day when we were together. I haven't worn it since. It's beautiful and I love it. That's why I kept it, but I still just can't wear it. I should just chuck it if I'm not going to wear it. I don't know why I keep it. It's not as if I'm still carrying a torch.
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Old 02-08-2007, 12:59 PM   #20
 
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I guess it's probably getting to me more than usual b/c I stumbled across the necklace former dude gave to me for V-day when we were together. I haven't worn it since. It's beautiful and I love it. That's why I kept it, but I still just can't wear it. I should just chuck it if I'm not going to wear it. I don't know why I keep it. It's not as if I'm still carrying a torch.
I'm right there with you!! I just broke up/got broken up with almost two weeks ago and I can't take this V-day bs. Every freakin' place I go, I get reminded of how important it is to be in a couple right now. And that reminds me of how great it felt to be in a couple. Which is depressing. I still have the necklace that he gave me for V-day a few years ago and I love it. It's the most precious thing any one has ever given me, and when we got back together last fall, I wore it all the time. But now, I can't even think of wearing it and I will never wear it again. Why do I keep it? Because I'm sentimental and right now tossing it or selling it would break my heart even more than it already is.

I think it's important to try and focus on what is good in your life, and ignore the fact that society (or the great marketing "machine" that is every where you go) has no idea how good your life is outside of a relationship. Even though I'm not happy about being single and am honestly very bitter at the moment, I'm just plowing through it and I know that I'll be stronger in the end and this Valentine's Day isn't going to mess with my head any more than my break-up did. I try to avoid places that are decorated for the holiday (was in the drug store yesterday and went down every aisle except the one with all the Valentine's bs), I avoid the commercials on TV and the radio, and I know that in a week it will all be over and I can go back to trying to become happily single again. (I have also found that yelling a strong "F You" at the TV when one of those cheesy Valentine's Day commercials comes on to be very therapeutic! )
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