I'm self conscious about my body....

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  • 3 Post By Yoshimi
  • 2 Post By Sayoon
  • 1 Post By Speckla

I'm 14 and my body is pretty developed for my age. I'm a pear shape meaning I have big hips and a big behind, but also have a small waist and average breast for my body shape. I hate my shape a lot because none of my friends have big hips like mines at my school. My friends all say I'm lucky and how the boys always stare at me (which I've never seen because most ignore me). It's embarrassing because some of the girls at my school automatically think I'm not a virgin and I'm a slut. When I tell them I'm still a virgin some of them make fun of me saying "what's the point of having a body shape like that if you're aren't going too put it to use?"
Sounds like you have an amazing body and petty girls are trying to make you feel bad about it. Try and remember you obviously stand out for a reason and its a good one so flaunt it! I know it's not much of a comfort but when your older you may be thanking your lucky stars ignore the petty girls and hold your head high, body shape does not make you a 'slut' at all. I used to be so self conscious but I started with looking in the mirror and making an effort to point out things I liked about myself, and making the most of them, and there still are things I don't like but they seem less important over time
Oh this was totally me, my backside grew about three times faster than the rest of me. (i now have a figure that I know my friends envy, it gets better)

The fact is though that if those kind of girls want to find something to pick on you for, they will always find something. If you hadn't developed they would pick on you for that instead. Their need to be mean is their problem not yours. Just hold on, it gets better.

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These girls r horrible..I think wer all self conscious when it comes to body image even these girls who give harsh comments , I honestly dunno what to tell u cuz I hv body image issues too but try to at least like urself, iv always hated my legs but when I had an accident n couldn't walk for 3 weeks hell yea I appreciated them n I won't change them for anything.
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Sounds like you have an amazing body and petty girls are trying to make you feel bad about it. Try and remember you obviously stand out for a reason and its a good one so flaunt it! I know it's not much of a comfort but when your older you may be thanking your lucky stars ignore the petty girls and hold your head high, body shape does not make you a 'slut' at all. I used to be so self conscious but I started with looking in the mirror and making an effort to point out things I liked about myself, and making the most of them, and there still are things I don't like but they seem less important over time
Originally Posted by sammyantha
I usually try to ignore them, but it gets annoying. Nobody besides my older sister has a body shape like mine and she is very immoral. My mother sometimes thinks I'll be like my big sister since we look alike. She always nags me about my clothes and automatically thinks when I wear something "tight" on my lower half its to get the boys.
I was self-conscious at your age because I was flat chested, but I remember the girls that developed early got teased too.
I suggest you try to find a support that you love doing. The most self-assured girls I have known have been athletes. The more you focus on the amazing things your body can DO, the less you worry about what it looks like and what other people think about it, in my experience. It can be a team sorry or it can be a solo thing like swimming, cycling, running, yoga.

Good luck, stay strong. The teen years can really suck. It trends to get better after high school is over.
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Beautyismiree, I'm glad you posted about this because I think a lot of us can really empathize with what you are saying. For one reason or another, so many of us have been or still are self-conscious about our bodies.

It sounds as though you have a lovely, normal, healthy feminine shape, but I understand why you are self-conscious. I hope some of the responses here will help a little.
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I was an early developer as well. ((Hugs))

Let me remind you that your body doesn't define you and what other's say doesn't define you. Be yourself and surround yourself with quality people who share your values and interests.

Are you wearing the correct size clothing? I never comfortably wore junior/miss sizes. Find clothes in women's sizes if thats what you need. They will fit better.


I was an early developer as well. ((Hugs))

Let me remind you that your body doesn't define you and what other's say doesn't define you. Be yourself and surround yourself with quality people who share your values and interests.

Are you wearing the correct size clothing? I never comfortably wore junior/miss sizes. Find clothes in women's sizes if thats what you need. They will fit better.
Originally Posted by mad scientist
Clothes in the junior sizes fit me well and sometimes too well. There are girls at my school who a even more developed then me and since they are more outspoken nobody picks on them.
I was developed,.. well I am, I turned 15 a few months ago, but trust me in high school you'll appreciate your body. Someone's gonna want a nice shape like yours(:

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I like to maintain my shape by eating a lot of pizza. Curves are kicking and if that makes people call me a slut? Well, bring it on!
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When you're older, you'll LOVE that body!!

But as a teen I see how you'll feel self conscious.

I developed early. I had hips and a shape at 6. Which prompted my mom to buy loose clothing and make me wear shorts under my skirts. She was afraid of molesters because my dad was one.

But that aside.

Just be proud of that cute shape. There's nothing wrong with having a great body. Just don't fall into the role people are choosing for you.
FroZen
Just be proud of that cute shape. There's nothing wrong with having a great body. Just don't fall into the role people are choosing for you.
Originally Posted by BlackAngelPlayah
This.

They make fun of you because they're jealous, because all teens are self-conscious, because you don't fit into their norm, for a million other reasons. Teenage girls can really suck at times (especially in middle school). It gets better - my daughters are 18 & 20 and past all that crap.
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I was self concious at that age too. While I had an ample rear, I was fairly flat chested. Kids can get teased for just about anything. Im sure there are girls at your school that get ragged for wearing a DD bra or for having a flat butt. It's easier said than done but it's best to ignore them. You'll only need to put up with it for four more years.

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I'm calling this summer Transformation Summer because I've gained some weight and I want to lose some before school starts. I just hope everybody goes through puberty by the time 9th grade starts so they can't bother me anymore.
Many ( Esp girls/ women) draw attention to others in a negative way because they are insecure/ unhappy with themselves. Be proud of your assets, be healthy ( eat right & exercise) and don't give any more attention to the negativity- eventually they'll move on and you will feel more comfortable in your skin. You've still got a few years to change and grow !
Don't let your heart be broken. Let it love.
I second joining a sport or getting involved in a school club or community service. It will help you to keep your self-esteem up and the girls will probably not mess with you as much. Teen years are either the greatest or worst time of your life.

Those girls sound insecure and jealous. I also am sorry that you are also dealing with negative comments from your mother. I had a similar issue with one of my aunt's who I lived with during high school. Although she had a great body, het chest was on the flat side. I on the other hand, was a DD in high school. She would make comments and make me wear baggy clothes. Find a way to cope. I think your mom may have your best intentions at heart but may not know how to go about it.

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I second joining a sport or getting involved in a school club or community service. It will help you to keep your self-esteem up and the girls will probably not mess with you as much. Teen years are either the greatest or worst time of your life.

Those girls sound insecure and jealous. I also am sorry that you are also dealing with negative comments from your mother. I had a similar issue with one of my aunt's who I lived with during high school. Although she had a great body, het chest was on the flat side. I on the other hand, was a DD in high school. She would make comments and make me wear baggy clothes. Find a way to cope. I think your mom may have your best intentions at heart but may not know how to go about it.

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Originally Posted by multicultcurly
I'm thinking about joining my schools step team. I know my mom is only saying those things but she doesn't want me to be self aware of my body shape. I know having big hips and a big butt are a good thing but to get ridiculed over it isn't something I want.
I second joining a sport or getting involved in a school club or community service. It will help you to keep your self-esteem up and the girls will probably not mess with you as much. Teen years are either the greatest or worst time of your life.

Those girls sound insecure and jealous. I also am sorry that you are also dealing with negative comments from your mother. I had a similar issue with one of my aunt's who I lived with during high school. Although she had a great body, het chest was on the flat side. I on the other hand, was a DD in high school. She would make comments and make me wear baggy clothes. Find a way to cope. I think your mom may have your best intentions at heart but may not know how to go about it.

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Originally Posted by multicultcurly
I'm thinking about joining my schools step team. I know my mom is only saying those things but she doesn't want me to be self aware of my body shape. I know having big hips and a big butt are a good thing but to get ridiculed over it isn't something I want.
Originally Posted by BeautyisMiree
Being ridiculed is never a good feeling. Go ahead and tru out for the step team. Usually the girls that ate involved in dance or sports tend to be too busy to be as petty as those that don't get involved with anything.

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