Wild~sasparilla, I have faith in you. Well, it's waning as I have not read a Buffy rant in a very long time! Focus, child!
This made me think of you:
It's sweet corn panna cotta, salted caramel ice cream, brown butter crumble, bacon powder (the stuff that looks like powdered sugar is the bacon powder, made with the fat and tapioca maltodextrin), sasparilla tapioca, popcorn, paprika tuile.
Ha, I literally came into this thread because I've decided to do a Buffy rant to take a break from trying to do the grant letter! And OMG that dish. I wants it. Someday when I have disposable income, I'm going to go eat everything related to my username.
Okay, time now to find out why Riley's in the "previously on Buffy" bit for this episode. Who is this annoying boy who's lecturing Buffy like he's been at the Doublemeat Palace forever? Why is he referencing Machiavelli to talk about a burger joint? Machiavelli does not care about greasy meat substitutes. What is with the subsequent "Oh yeah, I forgot you dropped out of college" and glib dismissal of her response? Dude, you work at a place that requires a plushie head hat. The MBA you're earning won't make you less annoying. Sit down and shut up. Oh no! They denied Buffy re-admittance? It says the forms have to be processed by January 15, 2002, so is it because they were late? That sucks so much. Also, they actually used the abbreviation UCSD for UC Sunnydale, which is the real-life abbreviation of the actual UC where my brother is a student and my mom is an employee and that was WEIRD. I thought they did that weird sun symbol thing to avoid that. HOLY FREAKING CRAP IT'S RILEY. HE WAS IN THE OPENING SEGMENT BECAUSE HE'S IN THE EPISODE. AND HE HAD TO SEE BUFFY AGAIN WHILE SHE'S WEARING A PLUSHIE HEAD HAT OMG SHOW WHY DO YOU HATE HER SO MUCH. I see that he now has the cross-the-eye scar of badassery that you always see in shows and cartoons. It's funny how all these like, scythes to the face or something keep miraculously missing these characters' eyes. Nnnnyehhhhh, I thought I could un-pause it but she's wearing a plushie head hat and she's seeing her ex for the first time after a bad breakup and empathizing with this situation burns my soul.
It's all going to be okay, because part of Buffy's confusion involved asking, "Were you always this tall?" and that is so how it happened for me that one episode I noticed what a freaking giant Riley is. AND she's just said, "My hat has a cow," so I now know what the plushie head is without having had to examine it! Oh, Buffy, honey, I know, but he seems to have known where you'd be to warn you of something specific, so it stands to reason he knew your hat would have a cow on it beforehand, which...yeah, you're right, that doesn't make it any better. I'm sorry. Meh, Riley's got a bit of a forced badass voice thing going on and it's just not working. Wait, so you've said that this demon species is "nearly extinct" (and "not extinct enough", ugh, CLUNKY) and that it's "a breeder - one becomes ten, ten becomes a hundred," etc. Did anyone read these lines before handing them to the actors? If this thing reproduces by demonic binary fission, it should never be able to go "nearly extinct." It's all or nothing with a thing that can self-replicate. ROFL "Wild bear," Riley? Seriously? It's grey and slimy and has a funky toothy spout-face. Only in Sunnydale would this work. Also, I think "you look like a pylon" needs to be ripped from its context and used to start an arsenal of insults for pathological wearers of neon orange. It's so contrived that Riley notices and loves Buffy's haircut even though it's tied back since he was never super observant, but still YAY! Have I become the guardian of Buffy's hair or something? Maybe it's just the way he said it: "Love the hair." Hee.
Whoa, Riley's married? Subtle, music sting, subtle. It's not that crazy. OMG, literal LOL at Willow offering to "carry the hate for the both of us" at Riley's wife and Buffy accepting the offer. XD The hilarity doesn't extend to me actually wanting to see Willow be an un-subtle jerk to this woman, though. That doesn't bode well for my amusement, especially since she seems nice and is telling Buffy she shouldn't feel bad for killing the demon. Hm, so the thing lays eggs. My earlier statement still stands. Actress playing Riley's wife, I don't think this head-tilt-upward-look was the best face to hold for your mini-conversation with Willow, and I disapprove of acting like this MagicCrack BS makes sense, but you're again proving you're a nice person by telling her you've never met anyone else with the strength to quit. Magic. Freaking - no, I'm okay. I'm just wondering if anything's going to happen to you, because you're just so nice. If Riley's return is a one-episode thing, I think you'll be okay, but if not, I'm worried. Wow, you also look really big next to Buffy in the same way Riley does. Subtle way to show you're a better match? Oh Buffy, you are using Spike abominably right now. Look at his face when you say, "Tell me you love me." It's like he's standing in sunlight and not getting burned. I know he's bad for you, but if it's possible, you may be even worse for him, getting his hopes up like this.
Oh no, was this a lead-in to an extremely awkward moment? They're asleep together and I feel like Riley's going to bust in on them. HE DID. AUGH, SHE HAS ALREADY SUFFERED THE IGNOMINY OF THE COW HEAD HAT, JOSS. THIS IS TOO MUCH. And Spike is the dealer they've been looking for? Or he really is holding the demon eggs for a friend. Aaand here we have the hurt feelings. Y'know, Buffy, he's right about you being a hypocrite with that "No more games" line. Also, it continues to bother me how violent you are with him. HA! ANYA, ILU! "If you love Riley Finn so much, why don't you just marry him?" Xander so needed to hear that during the breakup episode, but it's nice here, too. Thanks for giving Buffy a pep talk, Riley, and also thanks for being back just for one episode before hopping back on your chopper so your wife can live! Heh, I was just thinking that I never caught her name, then Xander said, "Bye, Sam!" Thanks, Xan. Oh, Spike, do they have demon therapists? You so need one. Buffy admits that she's using you and can never love you, and you basically respond that you'll take whatever you can get. It's so sad seeing someone be that desperate. Hm, I want to say it was nice of her to say, "I'm sorry, William," but do you not like to be called by your given name? IDK. Seems your fling is actually over now, though? And again, we couldn't just have Buffy grow emotionally on her own - we had to have a pointless Return of Riley episode to disrupt her life and press fast-forward on her choices. Wow, it just sunk in that Spike got all his stuff blown to smithereens the same night he got dumped. Ouch.
...It's a siggie.
Last edited by wild_sasparilla; 10-14-2011 at 01:28 AM.
Reason: Whoops, censored.
@LadyV69, try lactaid tablets. They have chewables. I am lactose intolerant as well. I don't leave home without them. There is even lactaid milk and ice cream.
I have tried the pills and they do work for me, but I found that half of the pack would go to waste and they're too expensive to keep wasting. I can tolerate yogurt and some cheeses, so I have a fairly mild case of it. Milk is what gives me the most problems. I do get the Lactaid milk. It's nearly double what regular milk costs, but I like the taste of it better as it's richer.
Fine haired, low density, highly porous curly kinky lady
Last relaxer: Not sure. 3/08 or 4/08
Co-wash: Suave Naturals, HEHH, Trader Joe's Tea Tree Tingle, CJ Daily Fix
Leave-In: KCKT, Giovanni Direct Leave-In, CJ Smoothing Lotion
Stylers: ORS Twist and Loc Gel, KCCC, Ecostyler, SheaMoisture Deep Treatment Masque
Deep Conditioner: DevaCurl Heaven In Hair, CJ Deep Fix
Heh, wild~sasparilla should probably stay away so she can watch it Mark Watches style and delight us with a recap as she does now with Buffy! For watching the whole series for the first time, a marathon is far too rushed.
Misspam, it's an old thread I revived. Should still be on page one right now.