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Old 02-14-2013, 12:58 PM   #67021
 
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Scrillsy, my BFF is bringing some homemade dog food (barf, but yay for the dogs) and some cupcakes over.

LaPlace is meh, but I'd go to Hudson with you. Or Ulta, or Starbucks, just generally. Check in on Sunday? I'll PM you.
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Old 02-14-2013, 12:58 PM   #67022
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Just saying, when I walked into the kitchen this morning... There were six boxes of chocolates sitting on the table, from my dad. Technically there are only four people living here (including him) at the moment, but he always buys a box for my sister and SIL, too. However, I wouldn't be at all surprised if he already gave SIL's box to my brother, and he bought an extra box for himself.

Me when I saw them:


Me when I saw the box of peanut butter meltaways:

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Old 02-14-2013, 01:04 PM   #67023
 
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-Valentine's Day is a good excuse to make brownies, right?!?

I'm not sure I can resist baking something today.

-If I didn't have to feed Mr. Spring I'm pretty sure I could live off of chocolate pudding for 3 meals a day.
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Old 02-14-2013, 01:06 PM   #67024
 
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Originally Posted by missbanjo View Post
So how about a b****-slapping trade? We could all put our names in and draw from a hat. Then travel to the other person's workplace and b****-slap the isht out of their coworkers that need it? Hey, this way we wouldn't get in trouble at our workplaces!
Oh I'd be so into this!!!!!!!!!!!
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Old 02-14-2013, 01:10 PM   #67025
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Hahahaha:

How Do I Put This Gently ? | WHEN SOMEONE HOLDS THE DOOR FOR ME

How Do I Put This Gently ? | MY ANSWER TO MY BEST FRIEND HAVING A ****TY DAY

(I so need to find a use for that gif. Maybe it just needs to be in my signature...)

How Do I Put This Gently ? | TO A LARGE PORTION OF MY FACEBOOK FRIENDS
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Old 02-14-2013, 01:11 PM   #67026
 
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seriously, listen to thelio.

while she is out of the house, change the locks.

get her mother or whoever to pick up her stuff.

period.

she won't listen - you take action.

JUST DO IT!

(with apologies to Nike!)
This bears (bares?) repeating. Change the locks. Heck, call the police if you have to. Why do you continue to let her do this???? You deserve so much better.

Again: JUST DO IT!
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Old 02-14-2013, 01:18 PM   #67027
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by rouquinne View Post
seriously, listen to thelio.

while she is out of the house, change the locks.

get her mother or whoever to pick up her stuff.

period.

she won't listen - you take action.

JUST DO IT!

(with apologies to Nike!)
i wouldnt get no body to get her or her stuff. I would let her call her own mama, when she comes home to find the locks changed and her stuff on the curb!
This! You can do eeeet!
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Old 02-14-2013, 01:21 PM   #67028
 
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OK I am totally sick of Black men being called animals or beasts whenever they commit a crime. Yes, the recent cases in which this happened were heinous, but I don't see White criminals being likened to animals nearly as often. Is it me?
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Old 02-14-2013, 01:23 PM   #67029
 
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She never leaves the house so I can't change the locks on her. She is always there. She plans stuff she has to do for when I'm gone so that she can be there 24-7 when I'm home. Even though we are miserable, she needs to be with me all the time.

If I put her stuff outside, I worry she will break my windows to my home and my car. I don't have car insruance right now, because of her, so I don't want that to happen (I will be getting insurance on the 1st just so everyone can rest easy that I'm not trying to continue messing up).

I just want her gone. Calling the police isn't something I want to do. It isn't my way and it isn't something I'd ever want done to me. Of course, if I have to, I will. BUt I want to try to avoid that at all costs.

We have been texting back and forth. She seems perplexed by my text messages of "please leave. I don't want this." Which just pisses me off.

But if she goes to work this saturday (but because I'm hoping for it, it will DEFINTELY not happen. That is how it goes with me) I will start packing her **** for her. I worry about her response when she gets back and sees what I've been doing, but I need her to see that I want her gone. Maybe I'll offer to help her pack today.

I don't want to help her. I just want her gone. She should pack her **** up herself and get the **** out of dodge.
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Old 02-14-2013, 01:33 PM   #67030
 
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Say It.  I Dare You.-imageuploadedbycurltalk1360873978.299898.jpg
For all the forever alones
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Old 02-14-2013, 01:58 PM   #67031
 
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She never leaves the house so I can't change the locks on her. She is always there. She plans stuff she has to do for when I'm gone so that she can be there 24-7 when I'm home. Even though we are miserable, she needs to be with me all the time.

If I put her stuff outside, I worry she will break my windows to my home and my car. I don't have car insruance right now, because of her, so I don't want that to happen (I will be getting insurance on the 1st just so everyone can rest easy that I'm not trying to continue messing up).

I just want her gone. Calling the police isn't something I want to do. It isn't my way and it isn't something I'd ever want done to me. Of course, if I have to, I will. BUt I want to try to avoid that at all costs.

We have been texting back and forth. She seems perplexed by my text messages of "please leave. I don't want this." Which just pisses me off.

But if she goes to work this saturday (but because I'm hoping for it, it will DEFINTELY not happen. That is how it goes with me) I will start packing her **** for her. I worry about her response when she gets back and sees what I've been doing, but I need her to see that I want her gone. Maybe I'll offer to help her pack today.

I don't want to help her. I just want her gone. She should pack her **** up herself and get the **** out of dodge.
Sometimes a messing break up can result in calling the cops. you wont be the first one to have to do. or the last.
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Old 02-14-2013, 02:09 PM   #67032
 
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Quote:
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She never leaves the house so I can't change the locks on her. She is always there. She plans stuff she has to do for when I'm gone...
take a day off work - wait for her to leave the house. go back after she's gone.

Quote:
If I put her stuff outside, I worry she will break my windows to my home and my car.
her name isn't on your lease, she has no legal right to be there - this is break and enter.

Quote:
We have been texting back and forth.
do NOT reply, don't engage her.

Quote:
I will start packing her **** for her.
don't pack her stuff up, don't offer to help her pack.

make an appointment with a locksmith to come and change the locks on your house when she's at work on Saturday. get a friend to come to your house to stay with you.

and while it sounds good to just dump her stuff outside, take the high road and get her family/friends to come get it.

do i have to get every LA-area curly girl to come over there and knock some sense into you??? because i'm pretty sure that our Ms Sas would do it if i asked her to...
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Old 02-14-2013, 02:10 PM   #67033
 
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juana, i'll take the one with the orange ribbon!

could you have it gift-wrapped and sent to my house????

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Old 02-14-2013, 02:13 PM   #67034
 
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Minxy, dear

If it were me, I wouldn't wait for her to leave to pack up her ****. I've been in a similar situation, and my experience is people like that won't leave voluntarily. They take advantage of your kindness to try and wear you down in hopes that you'll give in. You're giving her all the attention she wants, why would she leave? You say you want her gone, but your not enforcing your words with action. You don't ask a person to leave you. If you don't want to be with someone, they don't have a choice in the matter. It's not negotiable. You say it's over, then it's done. By asking you are giving them the power over you.

Don't fight about it anymore. It doesn't matter if they're in the same house, just don't respond to it. Block her number so you don't have to deal with the texts anymore. There's nothing you need to hear from her. You're just rehashing the same crap over and over again. You're not going to win that way.

Things are not going to change unless you change them. Stand up and fight for you're own happiness, it's worth it. Being stuck in a bad relationship is hell, and you will feel a billion times better when it's finally over. Trust me.
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Old 02-14-2013, 02:16 PM   #67035
 
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Say It.  I Dare You.-imageuploadedbycurltalk1360876589.065739.jpg
Enjoy!
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Old 02-14-2013, 02:22 PM   #67036
 
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^ haha. I would love of a bag of those.


I gave up on this 'holiday' so long ago, it isn't even funny.
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Old 02-14-2013, 02:24 PM   #67037
 
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Minxy, dear, read cympreni's advice about 50 times, then take a deep breath, and do it. You are stronger than you know, and we have every faith in you. Once you've done this, anything else in life that comes at you will be a piece of cake. Really.

Do eet.

And we love you.
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Old 02-14-2013, 02:35 PM   #67038
 
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Minxy, I know what you mean about not wanting to call the law. I might be one taking the calls, but that doesn't mean I have ever called the law on anyone in my life. I like to handle my own isht. It is good to know they are there, and can help if needed, but I do understand not wanting to go there.

With that said, Cymp is right. You have to say it, mean it, do it, and ignore her pleas for attention. As long as you are feeding into it, she will be around. It sounds like she'd pitch a tent in the hard as long as you were still talking to her.
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When I hear terms like "hipster" I think, who told cliques they could leave high school??

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Old 02-14-2013, 02:39 PM   #67039
 
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FML. Auto correct will not turn off anymore, and it's determined to destroy me.
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When I hear terms like "hipster" I think, who told cliques they could leave high school??

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Old 02-14-2013, 02:44 PM   #67040
 
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Minxy, please printout a notice of eviction and give her 30 days to vacate. This gives you both a definitive date and is the legal thing to do. The last thing you want is to change the locks and get into trouble. She has been living there for an extended period of time and if I am not mistaken is considered a de facto tenant. Better to err on the side of caution.

Please do it! Your home should be your bastion from the craziness of the outside world. If you can't have peace in your home, where can you have it?
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