Say It. I Dare You.

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Do you think it's worth it to do that? I feel so often that I have to fake who I am, not only at work but in general, I'm afraid to be the "real" me. I often don't feel I fit in.
2/c and some 3A. Modified CG.
Protein sensitive
Highly porous. Color over grey.
Best 1st day method: Super Soaker
Conditioners: Curl Junkie Beauticurls Strengthening Conditioner,
Deep condish: Curl Junkie Curl Rehab
Stylers: Mix Curls in a Bottle into everything for shine. Terrible pj
Sometimes try roller sets - classic glamor but I prefer my curls.
Every day is a gift
Then be the real you. Engage as much as you can. When you start to lose your will to live through the conversation, excuse yourself and move on to another conversation.

Or just walk around the whole time saying hello, smiling politely a couple of times and then go.

But I tend to go to work stuff because I don't want to seem like I hate my job.
rouquinne, B-wavy and curlypearl like this.

Mix of 3s, thick, coarse, medium porosity

Current hair styling technique: rake with a scrunch at the end. (works with my coarse hair)

http://public.fotki.com/curlymix/
pw: curls

Known HGs: KCCC, homemade fsg, honey
I totally hate having to attend cocktail parties for my co. I manage a Board Meeting of 50 people and my co. is having a cocktail party for them afterward. Ugh!!! I am shy, I'm not supposed to drink alcohol, I have absolutely nothing in common with these CEO's of major banks, etc., and I want to be drinking in a good book!

I'm invited but my supervisor said I'm not obligated to attend. Of course it will look really crappy if I don't attend, but I can't stomach it. Introverted curlies, give me some encouragement! I do a great job for my boss - but I loathe the idea of exchanging meaningless chit chat with these people that I don't know and don't care about at all. Unfortunately, if I don't go - it will be obvious that I am completely uninterested in them, but I'm not going to go anyway, even though I'm scared it will count against me.
Originally Posted by curlypearl
Can you invite (bribe) a coworker to tag along w/ you? Not as awkward as bringing a date and it would still be a buffer for you.

Or can you make friends w/ the person who is catering/managing the affair so you can "help" him/her and keep yourself occupied and appearing to be involved.

I'm not exactly introverted but I am very rigid in terms of the things that I do and don't like. And yes, being forced to mingle w/ a group I find boring/pompous/very different would be torture for me and I would come across as rather badly. I totally get the concept of not wanting to fake it.

I think as lomg as you say hello to everyone and spend at least 30 mins there, you have done your job.

But also remember, these ppl could be your next (better-paying) employer if they like you.
curlypearl and Curlyminx like this.
3b (with 3c tendencies) on modified CG


Last edited by spiderlashes5000; 06-24-2013 at 11:18 AM.
I was going to suggest exactly what minxy said - go for a very short time and say you have other plans. Get yourself a club soda with lime -- it's refreshing, and no one has to know there isn't any alcohol in it. Mingle, mingle, then skedaddle. Use your acting abilities and pretend it's a role - make it fun. And then head for the hills. Vrooooooooooooooom!
Yes, I can see the logic in that. I actually like my job - so I think I need to show my face for a few minutes.

One of these CEO's boasted in an interview how she never learned to type - in order to avoid becoming an EEKKK god forbid - the lowest of the low - secretary (which I was for years) and so became the great and fantastic person she is now. I hope she chokes.

Thanks, Minxy.
2/c and some 3A. Modified CG.
Protein sensitive
Highly porous. Color over grey.
Best 1st day method: Super Soaker
Conditioners: Curl Junkie Beauticurls Strengthening Conditioner,
Deep condish: Curl Junkie Curl Rehab
Stylers: Mix Curls in a Bottle into everything for shine. Terrible pj
Sometimes try roller sets - classic glamor but I prefer my curls.
Every day is a gift
She can go to hell. Not knowing how to type is a real drawback if Ms. Self-Important Banking/CEO ever finds herself out of a job.

I would hate it too, cp, but Minxy and B-w gave good advice. Maybe buy a new shade of lipstick in advance, or reward yourself afterward. I recommend shoes or a purse.

http://geaugadoggy.wordpress.com
CP

in cases like these, I find a task for myself. Maybe I linger near the front and say "oh coats go over here" (not that we have a need for coats this time of year) or "the bathroom is that way", whatever, if I have a task, I am in a role and can do much better than if I'm just cut loose to mingle. I hate things like this with a passion. but go, fake it a bit, and also decide going in what time you can leave, then you have an exit point (and you may find you want to stay a bit longer)

big hugs
B-wavy and curlypearl like this.
Modified CG since Dec 2011
Growing out super short cut

High porosity, fine, unknown curl type, somewhere in the 2s at the moment
Mostly low poo
Current rotation includes:
Wash: Yes To Carrots -Condition: Yes to Cucumber, Nature's Gate Jojoba, One C - Stylers: Deva volumizing foam, Deva UDG B'Leave In, Foxy Curls Hi-Def Curl spray
She can go to hell. Not knowing how to type is a real drawback if Ms. Self-Important Banking/CEO ever finds herself out of a job.

I would hate it too, cp, but Minxy and B-w gave good advice. Maybe buy a new shade of lipstick in advance, or reward yourself afterward. I recommend shoes or a purse.
Originally Posted by claudine191
If I could give a "love" to this one, instead of a "like" I'd do that. Both paragraphs hit the spot! Thanks for the support.
claudine191 likes this.
2/c and some 3A. Modified CG.
Protein sensitive
Highly porous. Color over grey.
Best 1st day method: Super Soaker
Conditioners: Curl Junkie Beauticurls Strengthening Conditioner,
Deep condish: Curl Junkie Curl Rehab
Stylers: Mix Curls in a Bottle into everything for shine. Terrible pj
Sometimes try roller sets - classic glamor but I prefer my curls.
Every day is a gift
Hi PerriP, that's a great idea! A task would help - I'll see what I can come up with. I'm in charge of the Board Meeting, and this is afterward, so I may be able to finagle something. If not, I'll talk to the people who are serving the drinks. Thanks for chiming in and helping me feel less like a weirdo!

I may relax my med. standards and get somewhat plastered. I'm supposed to be avoiding alcohol for the most part, but this is an emergency. And the docs didn't say avoid it altogether - pour me into the nearest margarita.
Curlyminx likes this.
2/c and some 3A. Modified CG.
Protein sensitive
Highly porous. Color over grey.
Best 1st day method: Super Soaker
Conditioners: Curl Junkie Beauticurls Strengthening Conditioner,
Deep condish: Curl Junkie Curl Rehab
Stylers: Mix Curls in a Bottle into everything for shine. Terrible pj
Sometimes try roller sets - classic glamor but I prefer my curls.
Every day is a gift
Noooooooooo, do NOT get somewhat plastered or even the eensiest bit tipsy. Alcohol at business functions is a bad, bad idea.
Amneris, Zinnia and KurlyKae like this.
And you are not a weirdo. You are our beloved curlypearl. And an introvert.
reeni, rouquinne, KurlyKae and 3 others like this.
B-Wavy, you made me smile a HUGE smile. Love ya!
B-wavy likes this.
2/c and some 3A. Modified CG.
Protein sensitive
Highly porous. Color over grey.
Best 1st day method: Super Soaker
Conditioners: Curl Junkie Beauticurls Strengthening Conditioner,
Deep condish: Curl Junkie Curl Rehab
Stylers: Mix Curls in a Bottle into everything for shine. Terrible pj
Sometimes try roller sets - classic glamor but I prefer my curls.
Every day is a gift
Hi PerriP, that's a great idea! A task would help - I'll see what I can come up with. I'm in charge of the Board Meeting, and this is afterward, so I may be able to finagle something. If not, I'll talk to the people who are serving the drinks. Thanks for chiming in and helping me feel less like a weirdo!

I may relax my med. standards and get somewhat plastered. I'm supposed to be avoiding alcohol for the most part, but this is an emergency. And the docs didn't say avoid it altogether - pour me into the nearest margarita.
Originally Posted by curlypearl
I would totally find "finishing up the board mtg tasks" to occupy me. Really, I can stack papers for hours if I need to organize pens and pencils, make sure the chairs are back the way they should be
B-wavy and curlypearl like this.
Modified CG since Dec 2011
Growing out super short cut

High porosity, fine, unknown curl type, somewhere in the 2s at the moment
Mostly low poo
Current rotation includes:
Wash: Yes To Carrots -Condition: Yes to Cucumber, Nature's Gate Jojoba, One C - Stylers: Deva volumizing foam, Deva UDG B'Leave In, Foxy Curls Hi-Def Curl spray
My temptation is to always head for the alcohol as well, but I have a fear of turning into Homer Simpson when I'm drunk, which I would hate to see happen to you, too.

B-wavy and curlypearl like this.

http://geaugadoggy.wordpress.com
Nine times out of ten, I really hate a peep-toe shoe.
B-wavy likes this.

http://geaugadoggy.wordpress.com
My temptation is to always head for the alcohol as well, but I have a fear of turning into Homer Simpson when I'm drunk, which I would hate to see happen to you, too.

Originally Posted by claudine191
That was the best laugh I've had in ages. I actually snorted. Thanks, claudine. *wipes away tears*
curlypearl likes this.
Believe me, it's born of experience. And the hangover the next day stinks, too.
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So, is it a good idea or a bad idea to wait before making a radical change to one's hair? I'm thinking of going significantly shorter, and I'm nervous that my stylist will try to talk me out of it. (The length of time involved is a week.)

http://geaugadoggy.wordpress.com
Believe me, it's born of experience. And the hangover the next day stinks, too.
----------------
So, is it a good idea or a bad idea to wait before making a radical change to one's hair? I'm thinking of going significantly shorter, and I'm nervous that my stylist will try to talk me out of it. (The length of time involved is a week.)
Originally Posted by claudine191
In my experience, it's a good idea to wait. I usually regret hasty decisions regarding my hair. I experiment like crazy during the period while I'm waiting to go to my hair appointment and try different products and techniques to see if anything makes me feel differently. I also talk to the stylist and tell her what's driving me crazy about the current length to see if she's got some other suggestions. I've been thinking about going significantly shorter for the summer myself. The only thing that's been stopping me is the thought of growing it back out when I tire of it. Good luck!
I think you are supposed to consider it for a week.

If everyday you feel the same about the desire to cut, then cut.

I did that. I waited the whole week and everything. I regretted it later even though i waited. Then again, my issue is laziness. Who has time to do their hair daily?!?!
B-wavy and TRBL like this.

Mix of 3s, thick, coarse, medium porosity

Current hair styling technique: rake with a scrunch at the end. (works with my coarse hair)

http://public.fotki.com/curlymix/
pw: curls

Known HGs: KCCC, homemade fsg, honey
Oh the many times I come in to the office with wet hair... seriously it's almost everyday. It's dry by 9-9:30ish. Hair is just not something I spend a ton of time on. Is that weird to say on a hair board?
B-wavy likes this.
When I grow up, I wanna be a Jiujitsu Turtle!

My british name, courtesy of Ninja Dog Shade Haven-Staffordshire: TRBL Hough Jewelstone Turtleneck

Its chaos a few hairs at a time. ~Minxy

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