Which of us are job hunting?

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I got a job offer yesterday for a position I interviewed for three weeks ago. Thing is, it pays $10,000 less and it's probably a step down from what I'm currently doing. I was so flustered that I replied that I would accept, but after think it over, I feel that it would be mistake to take it. It would be one thing if I were out of work didn't have anything else on the horizon, but that's not my situation. I also don't want to sell myself short. I haven't yet figured out how to tell these people that I've changed my mind but I know I have to do it as soon as possible.

I also chatted with a friend last night who I haven't seen or spoken to since New Year's. She hasn't had a full time job in four years. She went back to school three years ago, but stopped going last fall. She's been temping for the last 6 months and had been temping for about a month in January. She said it was boring and the pay wasn't that great. Here's the kicker-they offered her a permanent position. She didn't take it because according to her, the work was mind numbingly dull and it paid $15 an hour. Which works out to roughly $28,000 a year, which is nothing in NYC. However, since she doesn't have a lot of recent work experience, that is a situation where she should have taken the job for at least a year while she looked for something better. Bleh.
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I just snapped at one of my close friends and kinda feel bad now.

She still works at the office I was laid-off from five years ago...the one with the big "people lying on their timesheets" controversy. They made me sit there with an excel chart and rat people out.

She complains about her job CONSTANTLY and was complaining this morning that a guy who was there for two months gave notice and that it is "so unfair that he gets to leave before I do."

This girl also got a demotion last year because she wasn't doing well enough, but still has a job.

She also knows full well what I am going through.

I wrote:

"You need to see where I'm coming from. That office threw me away after making me sit there with an Excel chart and ratting people out.

No matter how horrible you think you have it there, at least they demoted you before letting you go. They just completely screwed me, and, I kinda feel, put me on this path to losing jobs for the rest of my life.

This depression is truly debilitating. I haven't been myself in over a year. I'd do anything for any job.

It's apparently way easier to get a job while you have one. I never had that luxury to find that out. Nobody is holding you back but yourself. Start applying like crazy and you can get yourself out of there."



I don't feel I was out of line. I'm the last person she should be complaining to about how awful her job is.
^That's why I try not to vent too much about my job to jobless friends. Because I know they'll think I'm annoying and ungrateful. It's not that I'm ungrateful, it's that I'm bored and stagnant.

I don't know how I kept my composure when I chatted with my friend last night. Her situation is way more desperate than mine, yet she's more cavalier about it. She went to an Ivy League school and probably thinks the job she was offered is beneath her but if I were in her situation, I'd have grabbed it and made the best of it for a year.
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They were delightful and amazing and lovely and I need to work there!!!!!!!!!!
^That's why I try not to vent too much about my job to jobless friends. Because I know they'll think I'm annoying and ungrateful. It's not that I'm ungrateful, it's that I'm bored and stagnant.

I don't know how I kept my composure when I chatted with my friend last night. Her situation is way more desperate than mine, yet she's more cavalier about it. She went to an Ivy League school and probably thinks the job she was offered is beneath her but if I were in her situation, I'd have grabbed it and made the best of it for a year.
Originally Posted by LadyV69
Our situation is different, though. It goes beyond complaining about her job. She works in an office that laid me off, but kept her despite that she has gotten reprimanded and demoted for not doing a good job because she's been there for so long and they don't want to train anyone. She's always talking about how successful her husband is and how they could live off his salary and she really really hates her job.

She also sends all of these emails complaining about her office from her work email address and on the rare occasion she applies for a job, also uses that address!
Would anybody recommend being a bank teller for an interim job? I had applied for a few and one called me yesterday and sent me an automated questionnaire to take on the phone when I had a moment. It's a couple of dollars more an hour than the last retail job I was working, and I was thinking if I worked Saturdays and then 3-4 days during the week, I can keep a day or two open for interviewing. I just want a plan for when my unemployment runs out.

My second interview yesterday went really really well. First of all, it's a nonprofit and the office is all women, which would be a nice change from being one of the few women in a room full of very diva-ish men. They were very nice, it's a good job with a good salary/benefits. One lady was like, "You'd have so many extra moms here!" which wasn't very professional obviously but a nice and personal thing to say. They asked me when I could start and I said, "Tomorrow!"

Apparently, I still need to meet with another executive who wasn't there. Gaaaaaaaah.
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Why do I tell my mother anything?

Just had a screaming match over the phone which all stemmed from me saying I was going to look into bank telling for now because it's pretty good money and hours and she flipped out at me that I'm not responsible enough for that and I'm "TERRIBLE" at math (I'm really not, I have no idea what she's talking about? and I was a cashier for six years and never made mistakes.)

I just started yelling at her that she makes me feel like crap, that I feel like I can do NO RIGHT in her eyes and she told me I OBVIOUSLY told her about the bank idea because I wanted her input. (No, no. I was making conversation and hoping it made me look good that I was willing to do that.)

In the midst of the fighting, she tells me she has to go so she can go to the beach and I said, "Fine! Go live your little imaginary life in lalaland with the man who cheated on you for ten years that you had to take back because you couldn't give-up your lifestyle!"

She flips-out that it's the worst thing I've said to her and then I wonder why I have no friends (HUH? HUH? HUH? When did I ever say I had no friends? I have a ton of friends!)

She really does suck the life out of me. I don't know why I tell her anything.
CIBC

I started as a bank teller from being a day care assistant teacher. I only applied for the job BC my mom was harrassing ne about it. I lives that job. I worked there for several years and had a couple of promotions til I was a Teller Supervisor / Customer Service Rep. Teller Supervisor is way more involved than it sounds.

Their benefits are fantastic, they promote within, they send you to all kinds of training workshops, and if you're full time they will probably send you to school if you enjoy the field.

For the record, no one is worse at math than me. I can barely add and subtract without using my fingers. I don't not understand fractions. Period. But my best field is accounting and finance.

Its not about math. You have a calculator practically attached to your hand at all times. In fact, most of the new software does all the math for you. Its more figuring out and problem solving. Even in a power outage when you balance by hand, its just about placement and having even credits and debits. You will be supplied with a battery operated calculator.

And getting into a banking field yields a lot of opportunity. There's account openings, loans, retirement, marketing, sometimes insurance - and other departments that have noting to do with actual money.

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I need a new job. NOW!!
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Thank you! I really did figure being good at math wasn't a qualification. The applications ask if you have cashiering experience, which I have, and was always good at.

I guess I must have been on crack to EVER expect anything along the lines of,"It's a great idea! Worth a shot. I'm sure you'd be great at anything you set your mind you."

I can't tell you how much she hurts me. She makes me feel completely worthless and like an invalid and like I'm not capable of accomplishing anything.
Thank you! I really did figure being good at math wasn't a qualification. The applications ask if you have cashiering experience, which I have, and was always good at.

I guess I must have been on crack to EVER expect anything along the lines of,"It's a great idea! Worth a shot. I'm sure you'd be great at anything you set your mind you."

I can't tell you how much she hurts me. She makes me feel completely worthless and like an invalid and like I'm not capable of accomplishing anything.
Originally Posted by CanItBeChristine

Which is horrible because she's your mother, and you expect, and need her to build you up, not tear you down.

Ya, you'll have to cash checks, and hand out and take in money all day long, so you will have to be able to do that. But it's figured out for you, you just have to count it out. They'll teach you how to count it back, or enter it into a calculator to make sure you're using the right amount. And you'll get used to triple checking everything.

Of course you'll have times when your drawer is off and it will feel like the end of the world, and you'll swear you're going to get fired, but it's normal, and they expect that once and a while, especially if you're new. You just have to be careful with cash handling, and don't be afraid to ask another employee to double check you if you're nervous.
I agree with everything Iroc said about being a bank teller.
I was a teller when I started this thread almost 5 years ago. That was my in between job. I took a teller job until I could find a "real" job. The one I still have today.
I found that interviewing was not a problem. I worked 7:30- 4 so I could schedule interviews after that time.
I liked the benefits, and the hours were good for me. I figured getting paid something was better than sitting at home obsesing over resumes all day. It was 5 minutes from my house so there was enough time to go home and do the resumes then. .
I'm going to do the automated tests and if things work out, I am not telling my mom until I am named Teller of the Month or something.
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Oh my gosh!

I got a voicemail from this woman while I was at the doctor today. I recognized her name right away...her aunt (with the same last name) is a very famous actress that I worked with on a show at my last job.

AND she gave me her houseline, cellphone and home line to call back.

(I tried all three...left voicemails on all three...and am kinda freaking-out that she hasn't called me back but she also said she was leaving for the other coast and that we might not be able to touch base until next week. I want to talk to her now!)

BUT I also realized that I saw her little daughter in a community production pretty far outside of the city last year! My friend directed it so I went. It was so random because it was a children's production and I didn't know any kid on that stage, but I still went! And her daughter was one of the stars!

I just feel signs all over the place!

But I have to stop seeing signs all over the place because if you look hard enough...you WILL see signs all over the place...
Originally Posted by CanItBeChristine
I hate that I'm still obsessing about this one and am thinking about all the crazy coincidences.
Originally Posted by CanItBeChristine

I talked to her via email! We're talking on the phone tomorrow!

Is it okay if I take this week off from applying and just see what happens with these THREE jobs I have a good feeling about? I'm kinda drained and want to see what happens. I did my bank automated interview this morning, and if that works-out, I can relax about money a bit.

I would also like to add that I AM very glad I have a roof over my head, but HOLY COW HOW DOES ANYBODY AFFORD ANYTHING IN THIS WORLD? It's crazy. I was looking at apartments last night and realized why I hadn't moved-out...there is nothing remotely in my last price ranges that would have been in a safe enough area unless I wanted to stuff 10 roommates into a studio. It's crazy!
CIBC - don't feel guilty about taking a break. Looking for a position is draining. Take this time to recharge.
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Would anybody recommend being a bank teller for an interim job? I had applied for a few and one called me yesterday and sent me an automated questionnaire to take on the phone when I had a moment. It's a couple of dollars more an hour than the last retail job I was working, and I was thinking if I worked Saturdays and then 3-4 days during the week, I can keep a day or two open for interviewing. I just want a plan for when my unemployment runs out.

My second interview yesterday went really really well. First of all, it's a nonprofit and the office is all women, which would be a nice change from being one of the few women in a room full of very diva-ish men. They were very nice, it's a good job with a good salary/benefits. One lady was like, "You'd have so many extra moms here!" which wasn't very professional obviously but a nice and personal thing to say. They asked me when I could start and I said, "Tomorrow!"

Apparently, I still need to meet with another executive who wasn't there. Gaaaaaaaah.
Originally Posted by CanItBeChristine

I feel like I just got stabbed in the heart first thing in the morning

It really went well. I'm so confused. I can't do this anymore I really can't.





Good morning CIBC,

We’ve had some time to talk internally, and we just don’t think that this is the best fit, for you or us. We truly wish you the best of luck in finding a position.

Thank you for your time and for considering the position.

All best,

I was feeling so hopeful and was idiotic enough to think that I'd actually get more than one offer this week.

I really, REALLY can't do this anymore. I feel like I'm walking around with two black eyes. I just can't take it anymore. What do people want from me? What is wrong with me?
I was just in my bed sobbing like a crazy person for a half hour.

I don't know what to do.

I feel like I'm being punished. I feel like such a failure.

Last edited by CanItBeChristine; 03-05-2012 at 09:35 AM.
My friend is trying to convince me that my former boss MUST be trashing me and that's the only logical explanation.

--He wrote me a RAVE letter that I'm including with my references. A rave!

--Even if he chose to badmouth me now, he would look mighty unstable and insane if he would trash somebody that he raved about.

--What could he POSSIBLY say about me? I did everything for that man. He put me in charge of euthanizing his freaking dog.


I hate that she is putting this thought in my head.
**** i just got rejected from the other job too.
I think I need to put blocks on my mother's number both ways so I just can't ever talk to her again.

Just had a SCREAMING MATCH.

Mom: If this job you're having the phone interview for falls through, you REALLY need to reinvent yourself. It is DEFINITELY you. You need to write down everything about you that could be wrong and CHANGE it. You CANNOT walk around with that high-pitched voice of yours...and I KNOW it comes-out more when you're nervous...and that curly hair. You can't. It's not professional. Nobody's going to hire f-ing Curly Sue for a job.

Me: And I have gotten hired in the past the way I was...

Mom: For jobs that just fire you anyway.

Me: How much of the country has lost jobs the past few years? They must all have curly hair and high voices, too. Are you really going to say (Former Boss) had a right in firing me? Did you listen to a single story I told you about how abusive he was? Go Google him...all that comes-up are stories about how notoriously psychotic he is. Everybody knows that.

Mom: I don't KNOW how you acted when you worked for him. Maybe he just couldn't take you anymore.

Me: ARE YOU SERIOUSLY TAKING HIS SIDE? A normal mother would be happy that I wasn't in an abusive relationship anymore, but God knows you're not a normal mother.

We screamed for a while, and I hung-up on her because I just got so frustrated. She called right back and I told her that I just can't talk to her. That I feel bad enough, that I am devastated and frustrated after getting two rejections from two good interviews in a row and that I was an idiot for ever thinking she'd be comforting and encouraging like a mother is supposed to be instead of preying on my insecurities and ripping me apart and making me feel ten times worse than I do already.

Mom: Think about it this way. What if you were a drug addict and I needed to use tough love to get you the help you need? Isn't this the same thing?

She told me to call her after I had my phone interview today, and I told her I won't be calling her on this subject ever again because she makes things ten times worse.

She yelled at me again, I hung-up on her again.

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