The Official Online Dating Diaries Thread - Page 104

MissKris · 11-05-2012, 07:54 PM

As a Cincinnati native, this doesn't surprise me. The men there often times are prideful to a fault, insecure, taught ridiculous practices where women are concerned, causing them to nitpik and set up a stupid dispute so they can make you out to be the nutjob.

Birth Feb 1984, First press 1990, First relaxer 1992, Last relaxer Oct 2006, BC Sept 2007, 4c.....

GoddessCurls · 11-05-2012, 11:29 PM

Oooh...and I'm gonna have to do another surgery..( I wrote abt in in the hysterectomy thread) it'd be over night in the hospital ...2weeks off...he said he'd come visit me and pick me up. I also have a follow up appt next Monday and he said he'd go with me...which is beyond sweet. I have to get used to someone being there for me...I've been doing it alone for a long time.

wild~hair · 11-05-2012, 11:59 PM

Very happy for you, Goddess!

GoddessCurls · 11-06-2012, 12:19 AM

Thanks....now just pray all this lady business gets sorted out easily.

thelio · 11-06-2012, 08:32 AM

Paws cross goddess!!

spiderlashes5000 · 11-06-2012, 08:45 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Josephine

Wow sounds like a lot of stuff! Cincinnati sounds like an ass. I've communicated with guys like that and fortunately they showed that side before I met up with them. It's an instant turnoff and I usually end up ignoring the person forever.

And the funny thing is he honestly has no idea. He thinks his behavior is perfectly normal and easy to deal with.

I guess I didn't explain the main misunderstanding that led to the finale. So I will now. tell me what you think...LOL

So when he initially asked me for a second date, it was two weeks before the date was to take place. He would be driving to Columbus for business and he said he would be done w/ his business obligation by 7pm. So in my mind, for the two weeks leading up to the date, I was anticpating meeting him around 7pm. (I'm free only every other wknd so on my free wknds, I need to cram a lot into them and I have to kind of plan my wknds ahead so there is not a lot of wasted time.)

So the night before the date, I just wanted to double check about the time, and I texted him, asking when he would be free...would it still be 7 pm? And he texted back "4 pm."

Well, I was kinda frustrated by that bc that was going to throw all of my wknd plans off. I was out w/ a friend at the time he texted that so I couldn't call him. And I needed some time to think about how I was going to rejuggle all of my errands, etc.

So the next morning, I texted him back and told him I would meet him at 5:30 at a certain huge destination w/ lots to do. I thought that was a fair compromise, as I had been anticipating meeting him at 7 all along.

He never said OK or not, so I just assumed 5:30 was ok. I figured he might even enjoy the hour and a half to himself and so he wouldn't have to rush to the meeting place...maybe he could check out the bookstore, shop, window shop, get a snack, whatever.

So at 4:00 he starts texting me asking me for directions to where the place is where I want to meet. (Why can't he just google or gps it?) And there is a lot of back and forth and miscommunication and I can sense in the messages that he is getting stressed out. At 4:15, he asks me how much longer I'm going to be.

And I'm like what? I will be at least an hour. And he gets furious...starts typing in all caps and using exclamation points. Like wtf, right?

So I decide to call him, instead of texting (which of course slows me down even more). And he is shouting and tantrumming about how he is starving and will pass out if he doesn't eat something and he has been waiting for me for "hours," spending time in a grocery store and wandering the streets and getting lost.

And I am like look, "I told you we could meet at 5:30. I'm sorry you got free at 4:00 but that is not my problem and I cannot plan my entire wknd around your schedule."

And then he came back at me w/, "you should have told me you were too busy to see me and we could have rescheduled."

And I was all like, "I wouldn't have been too busy at 7, as we had originally planned. And I won't be too busy at 5:30, bc I rearranged my schedule."

And then he was all like, "how do I know what is going on in your life.? You never told me what you had scheduled."

And I was like, "I don't need to. All I need to tell you is that I will meet you at 5:30."

And then he was like, "I'm going to go eat now. We'll just have to do dinner some other time. Maybe we can catch a movie after I'm done eating."

And it pretty much went left after that point.

LOL

Quote:

Originally Posted by Josephine

Too bad about army

I know. He's such a sweetie.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Josephine

and sucks about the ex. So the only issue is that the divorce was taking so long. I'm assuming it really is taking that long and you're trying to get it moving as fast as possible? Or does he think you might be delaying it for whatever reason?

He is mad the divorce is taking too long AND he is mad bc he thinks I'm delaying it to come out better financially AND he is mad bc he thinks I'm delaying it bc I am still in love w my exhusband AND he is mad bc he thinks I'm delaying it bc I am playing mind games w/ my exhusband AND he thinks I'm delaying it bc I haven't paid my atty AND he is mad bc he thinks I purposely lied to him about when then it would be finalized AND he thinks I don't appreciate him AND he thinks I wouldn't raise my kids to respect him AND he is mad bc I have a smart mouth...on and on. All of which is untrue...except maybe the that I have a smart mouth. LOL

But OMG how I LOVE that man!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I have never felt this way about anyone. Ever! We just cannot get along. I think he wanted to start something back up this wknd...and then I stupidly said the wrong thing and he got mad and it turned into a whole big mess. Ugh.

spiderlashes5000 · 11-06-2012, 08:47 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by GoddessCurls

Oooh...and I'm gonna have to do another surgery..( I wrote abt in in the hysterectomy thread) it'd be over night in the hospital ...2weeks off...he said he'd come visit me and pick me up. I also have a follow up appt next Monday and he said he'd go with me...which is beyond sweet. I have to get used to someone being there for me...I've been doing it alone for a long time.

He sounds nice!

Josephine · 11-06-2012, 09:18 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by spiderlashes5000

Quote:

Originally Posted by Josephine

Wow sounds like a lot of stuff! Cincinnati sounds like an ass. I've communicated with guys like that and fortunately they showed that side before I met up with them. It's an instant turnoff and I usually end up ignoring the person forever.

And the funny thing is he honestly has no idea. He thinks his behavior is perfectly normal and easy to deal with.

I guess I didn't explain the main misunderstanding that led to the finale. So I will now. tell me what you think...LOL

So when he initially asked me for a second date, it was two weeks before the date was to take place. He would be driving to Columbus for business and he said he would be done w/ his business obligation by 7pm. So in my mind, for the two weeks leading up to the date, I was anticpating meeting him around 7pm. (I'm free only every other wknd so on my free wknds, I need to cram a lot into them and I have to kind of plan my wknds ahead so there is not a lot of wasted time.)

So the night before the date, I just wanted to double check about the time, and I texted him, asking when he would be free...would it still be 7 pm? And he texted back "4 pm."

Well, I was kinda frustrated by that bc that was going to throw all of my wknd plans off. I was out w/ a friend at the time he texted that so I couldn't call him. And I needed some time to think about how I was going to rejuggle all of my errands, etc.

So the next morning, I texted him back and told him I would meet him at 5:30 at a certain huge destination w/ lots to do. I thought that was a fair compromise, as I had been anticipating meeting him at 7 all along.

He never said OK or not, so I just assumed 5:30 was ok. I figured he might even enjoy the hour and a half to himself and so he wouldn't have to rush to the meeting place...maybe he could check out the bookstore, shop, window shop, get a snack, whatever.

So at 4:00 he starts texting me asking me for directions to where the place is where I want to meet. (Why can't he just google or gps it?) And there is a lot of back and forth and miscommunication and I can sense in the messages that he is getting stressed out. At 4:15, he asks me how much longer I'm going to be.

And I'm like what? I will be at least an hour. And he gets furious...starts typing in all caps and using exclamation points. Like wtf, right?

So I decide to call him, instead of texting (which of course slows me down even more). And he is shouting and tantrumming about how he is starving and will pass out if he doesn't eat something and he has been waiting for me for "hours," spending time in a grocery store and wandering the streets and getting lost.

And I am like look, "I told you we could meet at 5:30. I'm sorry you got free at 4:00 but that is not my problem and I cannot plan my entire wknd around your schedule."

And then he came back at me w/, "you should have told me you were too busy to see me and we could have rescheduled."

And I was all like, "I wouldn't have been too busy at 7, as we had originally planned. And I won't be too busy at 5:30, bc I rearranged my schedule."

And then he was all like, "how do I know what is going on in your life.? You never told me what you had scheduled."

And I was like, "I don't need to. All I need to tell you is that I will meet you at 5:30."

And then he was like, "I'm going to go eat now. We'll just have to do dinner some other time. Maybe we can catch a movie after I'm done eating."

And it pretty much went left after that point.

LOL

Quote:

Originally Posted by Josephine

Too bad about army

I know. He's such a sweetie.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Josephine

and sucks about the ex. So the only issue is that the divorce was taking so long. I'm assuming it really is taking that long and you're trying to get it moving as fast as possible? Or does he think you might be delaying it for whatever reason?

He is mad the divorce is taking too long AND he is mad bc he thinks I'm delaying it to come out better financially AND he is mad bc he thinks I'm delaying it bc I am still in love w my exhusband AND he is mad bc he thinks I'm delaying it bc I am playing mind games w/ my exhusband AND he thinks I'm delaying it bc I haven't paid my atty AND he is mad bc he thinks I purposely lied to him about when then it would be finalized AND he thinks I don't appreciate him AND he thinks I wouldn't raise my kids to respect him AND he is mad bc I have a smart mouth...on and on. All of which is untrue...except maybe the that I have a smart mouth. LOL

But OMG how I LOVE that man!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I have never felt this way about anyone. Ever! We just cannot get along. I think he wanted to start something back up this wknd...and then I stupidly said the wrong thing and he got mad and it turned into a whole big mess. Ugh.

Yes cincinnati sounds very self centered and controlling. Did he really just completely ignore your 5:30 text after he switched the time without even asking if that was okay? I don't understand how he has the nerve? And then when he was in the wrong, he went off on you? LOL how old is this guy and what type of women did he date before that would put up with that behavior? Actually I've heard some women like to be controlled and want the man to make all the decisions. I believe it because there are a lot of idiots in this world. And how does he have no idea? O well.

That sucks about the ex. I definitely know how it feels to love someone like crazy but not get along on certain things that are very important. It's hard and hasn't worked out for me. It's so wonderful to have both, I can't even describe it.

ursula · 11-07-2012, 04:32 PM

Oh my, spiderlashes, Cincy sounds like a mess!

GoddessCurls: I hope the surgery goes well. It's so sweet of the new guy to take care of you that way. He sounds like a keeper.

GoddessCurls · 11-11-2012, 03:05 PM

So I saw the bloke last night. We went to grab dinner at this place in town. I invited my closest girl friend cause we have both have new beau's and have been squealing back and forth like little girls. Anyway....so they got along well. She thinks we make a cute couple. This is a first for me. I haven't had a dude meet a friend of mine in forever!

Josephine · 11-12-2012, 02:56 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by GoddessCurls

So I saw the bloke last night. We went to grab dinner at this place in town. I invited my closest girl friend cause we have both have new beau's and have been squealing back and forth like little girls. Anyway....so they got along well. She thinks we make a cute couple. This is a first for me. I haven't had a dude meet a friend of mine in forever!

That's good to hear. I've been wanting one of my closest friends to meet my dude but timing never worked out. So she finally met him in a group (before we all went out for Halloween). I can tell she doesn't like him

. She told me later that she liked my ex better than him which doesn't make any sense because she only met my ex twice real quick when we weren't together. She also told me she feels that he is controlling which he is definitely not.

I have a feeling she is upset that I don't give her all my alone time anymore. I had another friend later also tell me that she though my ex was controlling and I know she was jealous/upset that I didn't party with her alone all the time anymore. The thing is with current friend, I have tried to invite and include her in everything I do with bf(and I mean group events so she doen't feel like the third wheel) and she never comes.

Also in the beginning whenever I'd talk/gush about current dude, she would completely ignore what I said and ask about a guy in Orlando I was previously crushing on (who I actually had no physical contact with but she met him when I met him that first night). I guess I don't understand why she was so fixated on him for me and not who I want or like. She told me recently that she's worried I can't handle a guy with kids but I seem 'set' on him. What does that even mean? Yes I'm totally heads over heels in love with him, we are exclusive, I am not talking or seeing other guys, so I guess that means set. Why is that bad? I don't think she's worried about the kids, I think she just doesn't want me to be with him for whatever reason. And it could be because the Orlando guy is her sorta bf's friend and she liked him. But that guy is a pro nfl player and I don't like their lifestyles. I know my Orlando dude is not like that but most of his friends are so that was sort of a negative in my book but I didn't tell her that, we just have very different taste in men and what is or is not appropriate in relationships.

Sorry for venting. It's been bothering me and obviously caused a bit of an emotional rift between me and my friend.

GoddessCurls · 11-12-2012, 03:21 PM

Sometimes I think real close friends kinda get worried we'll be all love happy and ditch them. Also is ur friend single? Sometimes it's nice to have another single friend to commiserate with about stuff...she may not wanna lose that.

GoddessCurls · 11-12-2012, 03:28 PM

It just so happened that me and her both found guys around the same time....so we were being all girly and texting about them. She always wants to meet a guy i am dating but in the past they didn't last long enuff...lol

Josephine · 11-12-2012, 03:54 PM

Yes, I understand she might be upset but she's not really that type, I didn't even spend that much physical time with her before.

She's single and slowly breaking it off for good with guy she was seeing. Even though they 'dated' she didnt see him often and she had a very single lifestyle. When I'm with a guy, he's pretty much with me most of the time and I don't think she understands that.

I have another friend that also met a guy around the same time so it's easier to relate but she's generally understand. She just broke it off with him but I can still talk to her and she's supportive. She hasn't met him yet but wants to.

rouquinne · 11-12-2012, 04:11 PM

way WAY back around page 13 of this thread, i mentioned that i met someone near xmas 2 years ago. he's been living halfway across the country for most of this year after the plant he worked at was closed. today - TODAY - he told me that i'm the woman he thinks about and wants to be with!

*sigh* but he's across the country and i'm NOT moving ever again...

GoddessCurls · 11-12-2012, 05:20 PM

Jeez! Don't these guys have excellent timing?!

ursula · 11-13-2012, 06:17 PM

So I just saw a new show on MTV called Catfish (based on the film) which made me think of this thread. A cautionary tale about online dating!

This woman friends a guy on facebook who says he is a very successful 18-year old model who is also taking online classes to be an anesthesiologist

AND also on the side works for Chelsea Lately writing cue cards. They become boyfriend and girlfriend and the girl is so smitten she has wedding magazines on her coffee table. Unsurprisingly, he turns out to be a fraud: "he" is a lesbian living in Alabama.

The lesson is: don't go 8 months without meeting someone in person, or at least skyping! Actually, it was really sad. I don't know how real it is, since it's a reality show, but it was depressing and left me feeling really uncomfortable.

GoddessCurls · 11-13-2012, 07:49 PM

My girlfriend was texting me abt that show last night! Lol

Yeah...I never went a huge amount of time without a meeting. Was not interested in having a solely online relationship.

multicultcurly · 11-14-2012, 04:50 PM

I thought Catfish was a movie based on a young man's experience with a woman on Facebook. Turned out she lied about who she was. The movie came out about 4 years ago. It was a true story.

I tend to lose interest with online guys who don't want to meet after emailing for two to three weeks.

GoddessCurls · 11-14-2012, 07:23 PM

Oh...maybe. My friend was watching a show, she said where it was online dating...they corresponded thru email for some insane amount if time....and the dude turned out to be a chick somewhere.