The Official Online Dating Diaries Thread

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you really should be online dating and shaking up your regular social life at the same time. Do not put your eggs in one basket.
Originally Posted by wild~hair
this works well for me...i'm less worried about what happens on-line when i also go out "in real life"
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i change lives...through fitness
i'm more relaxed being natural
Is this guy a lil' too much?




Hey there!

Like my creative subject line? It took me about half an hour to think it up. I was going for something attention-grabbing yet cool and laid back, but also friendly and open.

So I seem to get a lot of winks from girls in NYC who don't realize I live nowhere near NYC, but your profile says you bounce between NY and central Jersey a lot, so...maybe you're one of the special few who knew where I lived when you winked at me? I hope so, cause you sound like someone I want to meet I like happy, laughing, clumsy, spaz romantics.

Ok, so...I don't raise seeing eye dogs but I love animals. I don't read to senior citizens, but I've helped them with their computer troubles fairly regularly (they're so cute). I don't coach a little kids' soccer team, but I've babysat some (including within the last few years), and my mom keeps telling me I don't call her enough, but I try Where's that put me on your Nice Guy scale? Oh, and I have nothing against plays, but I'm skeptical of your claim that I'll walk away humming show tunes. Sounds like a challenge to me...it's on.

Assuming you're cool with flirting with someone from central NJ and didn't suddenly realize this was a big mistake, here's a quiz! Nothing beats quizzes for figuring out how compatible you are, right? Give yourself no points for each A, 1 point for B's, 3 for C's and 5 for D's. Score under a 7 and we'll probably hate each other. Score 18 or above and you probably cheated, because I don't think anyone's that perfect Unless you really are, in which case I might propose to you on our 2nd date.

Here's the quiz! Good luck!

1) We're getting physical, we move the wrong way, and accidentally head butt each other. You:

A) Decide I'm inept and resolve to dump me at the first opportunity.
B) Cry.
C) Laugh, and later remind me about it every chance you get.
D) Don't even notice and just keep on going at it.


2) We're cuddled up on the couch, watching a gratuitous action movie. You decide to:

A) Refuse to watch it because you hate those kinds of movies.
B) Watch it with me on the condition that you get to pick the movie next time.
C) Enjoy the cuddling, and contentedly fall asleep two thirds through the movie.
D) You love gratuitous action movies, too!


3) I say something that could be interpreted in a few ways, one of which is calling you fat. Your reaction:

A) Become very upset at me, because obviously my intention was to call you fat...and that's cruel.
B) Become annoyed but drop it after I explain what I really meant to say.
C) Laugh at me for ineptly calling you fat, knowing that's not what I meant.
D) You didn't even realize you could have interpreted it as a fat comment.


4) We're c uddled up on the couch (again), and out of nowhere my kitten launches a flying death attack at your face. You:

A) Decide that this means war, and you hate my kitten from now on.
B) Endure the assault and let it slide.
C) Laugh and/or launch your own kitten counterattack.
D) The attack never landed because you're a ninja.


5) I spend some time hanging out with a friend I've known longer than I've known you, who happens to be a girl. Your reaction when I see you again:

A) You want to know what we were doing, and you judge my answers with suspicion in your heart.
B) You're a little wary of me spending time with her, and would like to meet her yourself, maybe by coming along the next time we hang out.
C) You have faith in me and trust that she's just another friend, as long as I'm not spending ALL my time with her.
D) Your trust me completely, so you don't even think about it.

By the way, I'm Paul, nice to meet you.
Paul
Paul seems a little … intense.

If he had sent an email with about 10% of the content of that one, he would come across as a friendly, interesting person.

As it is, he strikes me as someone who maybe forgot to take his meds.

Desperate come to mind, too.

I don't know. Email him back something polite and friendly. If he sends you another book, my advice would be to move on.

ETA: Actually, if it were me, I wouldn't even reply to him. [A quiz?! Are you kidding me?] But I'm trying to be nice.
And I'm sure he puts that quiz in EVERY MATCH.COM MESSAGE HE SENDS.
Are my standards too high?
Originally Posted by NYCurlyGirly
Regular dating is fraught with asshats. Online dating, doubly so.

You'll need a thick skin to get through it. I don't really have one, which is why I've never done much of it. But the other part is, you really should be online dating and shaking up your regular social life at the same time. Do not put your eggs in one basket.
Originally Posted by wild~hair
Very good advice and I plan on shaking things up starting this summer. I found that a lot of online guys are only interested in quick hookups. They SAY they want long-term but the questions they ask along with their actions speak otherwise. I'm sure there are guys wanting a real relationship but they haven't emailed me yet.
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And I'm sure he puts that quiz in EVERY MATCH.COM MESSAGE HE SENDS.
Originally Posted by CanItBeChristine
Awww, I think he seems nice. He strikes me as a little effeminate (so very chatty and cutesy in his writing style) which could get annoying to me. But I don't think you should write him off just yet.

You never know -- he might be getting coached by his sister or a female friend.
3b (with 3c tendencies) on modified CG

And I'm sure he puts that quiz in EVERY MATCH.COM MESSAGE HE SENDS.
Originally Posted by CanItBeChristine
Awww, I think he seems nice. He strikes me as a little effeminate (so very chatty and cutesy in his writing style) which could get annoying to me. But I don't think you should write him off just yet.

You never know -- he might be getting coached by his sister or a female friend.
Originally Posted by spiderlashes5000
He strikes me as someone who is trying a little too hard (a lot of people seem to fall victim to this when it comes to online dating profiles/emails), but not a bad guy - and hopefully less, uh, over-the-top in person. And while I agree that he probably includes that quiz in all his emails, he at least took time to personalize the rest of his email. If I were interested in him based on his profile, I probably wouldn't write him off because of one over-eager email.
Christine,
Have you met any of the guys from Match.com for a coffee or dessert date?
Life shrinks or expands according to one's courage. Anais Nin
No. I just need to jump in and do that, don't I?
No. I just need to jump in and do that, don't I?
Originally Posted by CanItBeChristine
Yes!

And hugs to you about your other post.
Life shrinks or expands according to one's courage. Anais Nin
Same guy...Okay, he is cute and nice, but...

I said how my sister and her family live nearby, how I'm glad we're so close, I spend so much time with her son, etc...

And it IS a deal breaker! I don't want to meet him and really like him only to know he's moving that far!


I will be moving to Maryland at some point...um...is that a deal breaker? With all the talk about not being able to imagine living far from your sister, it sounds like it could be. And if you go out with me a few times, you might just decide I'm really really awesome and fall for me, and then you'd have a tough decision to make down the road...whereas right now I'm just a bunch of text and a few pictures, and you could probably walk away with a little sniffle at worst. Maybe a sniffle mixed with thoughts of what could have been if fate weren't so cruel.

Last edited by CanItBeChristine; 03-30-2010 at 03:39 PM.
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OK, I find most of my dates online, but gee golly. Men seem to lie about their height awfully a lot. See, I'm kind of tall for a girl, I'm 5'7" and I won't date anyone under 5'9". Most guys that I meet off there tell me that they're 5'9" (San Diego must have a lot of shorties). And what do you know! They show up and I'm taller than them. They must have added 4" to their height. It keeps happening to me so I have completely stopped dating guys online. And also because a lot of them are superficial or just plain CRAZY.

IDK. Now I just tell them that I'm looking for friends. And so many of them seem to be prejudice about curly hair. When I have my straight hair photos I get a lot of emails, but when it's curly I get none. The heck?!

Last edited by helloyellowbird; 03-30-2010 at 03:44 PM.
Theatre is a bit of a sore subject with me because it was my ex wife's love of theatre/acting that was the downfall of my marriage. You could respond and try to change my mind if you like.







Theatre is a bit of a sore subject with me because it was my ex wife's love of theatre/acting that was the downfall of my marriage. You could respond and try to change my mind if you like.
Originally Posted by CanItBeChristine
Is this quiz guy or someone else?




Byron,GA> Charleston, SC> Jacksonville, FL> Guilford, CT> Rohnert Park, CA! A southern drawl in sunny Cali! .
The amount of time from slipping on the peel and landing on the pavement is exactly one bananosecond.
I do have a secret yen for pink in unexpected places. ~ninja dog
I've decided that I'll never get down to my original weight, and I'm OK with that--After all, 8 pounds 2 oz. is just not realistic.
A new one!

"And that ex-wife's name was Bernadette Peters..." haha. Kidding.
Theatre is a bit of a sore subject with me because it was my ex wife's love of theatre/acting that was the downfall of my marriage. You could respond and try to change my mind if you like.






Originally Posted by CanItBeChristine

Sensing too much baggage here.
3b (with 3c tendencies) on modified CG

Thought i'd share this gem of a message I got this morning! Think he sounds like a winner?

"Whats up Sweetie? How are you? Its a real pleasure too meet you You seem really sweet and after reading your profile, you definetly seem like my kinda woman 4sure Imagine us getting to know each other, sharing those pleasureful moments together, day after day after day and as you imagine, Im a man of many talents who definetly knows how to treat and pleasure a woman beyond normal everyday standards or expectations. Just imagine we can start a special friendship here, right now, which includes many hot nights for 2 both in and beyond the wonderful walls of the bedroom if u were to imagine feeling a sudden sense of comfort, excitement, and intrigue that allows a person to open up and indulge in those wonderful thoughts, you know, like Have you ever felt an incredible connection with someone its just like when you meet this exciting new someone. You magically begin too feel excited and totally comfortable with them, as you find yourself looking past what your normally use too, normal everyday rules, boundaries and limitations. You can begin to feel an incredible sense of connection with him more and more as every moment of communication feels better and better, you know that instantaneous click you feel right There, inside like you were meant too be with this person. I think its great when a person can experience that So if you are into Passionate, Hot, Deep, Sexy and Fun! It's all right Here! Im not sure if you are adventurous and forward thinking enough to imagine yourself enjoying this time and time again, with a great guy as you allow these thoughts to penetrate your smile you can begin to feel a sudden sense of comfort and excitement about these wonderful things! Im willing to bet that you are and If im right, Im your Man Sweetheart! You can contact me as Jayperfect1 on yahoo or aol messenger. Or you can text or hit me up at 386-xxx-0000 or feel free to leave me yours if you arent to shy lol!

Talk to you soon
Jay"
"Yo, James, i'm really happy for you, i'm gonna let you finish killing Bella in a minute, but Demetri was one of the best Trackers of ALL time!"

www.myspace.com/mimichica
NYCurlyGirly- First of all I'm deeply sorry your eyeballs even had to witness such vile. Secondly he should just shoot himself and get it over with. I just threw up a little reading that mess.




Byron,GA> Charleston, SC> Jacksonville, FL> Guilford, CT> Rohnert Park, CA! A southern drawl in sunny Cali! .
The amount of time from slipping on the peel and landing on the pavement is exactly one bananosecond.
I do have a secret yen for pink in unexpected places. ~ninja dog
I've decided that I'll never get down to my original weight, and I'm OK with that--After all, 8 pounds 2 oz. is just not realistic.
...
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Last edited by CurlsALOT; 04-08-2010 at 11:10 AM.
The first things people usually notice about me

My eyes and smile.and butt. I know a lot of ladies who would love to have a butt like mine...




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