Hair+child abuse

Not only was the brushing bad, but she kept hitting the poor child in the head with the brush.
That was horrible! That poor girl was in so much pain and her mother had no sympathy, she just kept insulting and swearing at her. Some people are just so mean
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Huh. I may be ignorant, but why does she keep on brushing it??? It looked brushed out to me...
Originally Posted by brown_eyedgal20
That's what I thought. It looked detangled enough for her to start making parts for ponytails, at least.
Who was taping that? And why?
Originally Posted by Phoenix
that's what i wondered too. i mean that was terrible enough to see, but who the funk was the scum who was not only allowing it to happen before their eyes without helping the kid, but TAPING it?

poor child. that is terrible.
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This brought me back to my own childhood, sadly. My mother would smack me with the hairbrush when I cried and wouldn't hold still. I remember a first grade teacher reporting my mother after a lice inspection that we had in school because my scalp had so many brush marks. Damn, that video took me straight back.

But, this woman is taking it to such a further extreme, and I am surprised that some of the Youtube comments are in support of the mother, assuming that the negative comments must not be from black people.

The attitude, the cursing, ignoring that screaming, and the laughing and comments from the person recording it are all abusive, IMO.
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This brought me back to my own childhood, sadly. My mother would smack me with the hairbrush when I cried and wouldn't hold still. I remember a first grade teacher reporting my mother after a lice inspection that we had in school because my scalp had so many brush marks. Damn, that video took me straight back.
Originally Posted by redcelticcurls


I used to get hit on the head with the brush too. My mother would put me in 2 tight braids each morning. She wanted them TIGHT TIGHT TIGHT. She would make me lean away from her so she could get them tighter. I fought against it, because it hurt, so she'd hit me with the brush, which also hurt. Eventually, she cut all my hair off one night in frustration, then took me to the hair dresser the next day to fix it up. I loved my little pixie haircut. It finally didn't hurt.

My mom never cursed at me though and by the time my hair grew long again, I was old enough to handle it myself.
This brought me back to my own childhood, sadly. My mother would smack me with the hairbrush when I cried and wouldn't hold still. I remember a first grade teacher reporting my mother after a lice inspection that we had in school because my scalp had so many brush marks. Damn, that video took me straight back.

But, this woman is taking it to such a further extreme, and I am surprised that some of the Youtube comments are in support of the mother, assuming that the negative comments must not be from black people.

The attitude, the cursing, ignoring that screaming, and the laughing and comments from the person recording it are all abusive, IMO.
Originally Posted by redcelticcurls
I assumed the exact opposite. In my world, you had to get used to getting your hair brushed. my mom didn't play the tears, screaming or moving around like that. Granted, she wasn't as harsh as this woman, but my mama wasn't having a tended-headed child.

I think stuff like this happens all the time
This brought me back to my own childhood, sadly. My mother would smack me with the hairbrush when I cried and wouldn't hold still. I remember a first grade teacher reporting my mother after a lice inspection that we had in school because my scalp had so many brush marks. Damn, that video took me straight back.

But, this woman is taking it to such a further extreme, and I am surprised that some of the Youtube comments are in support of the mother, assuming that the negative comments must not be from black people.

The attitude, the cursing, ignoring that screaming, and the laughing and comments from the person recording it are all abusive, IMO.
Originally Posted by redcelticcurls
I assumed the exact opposite. In my world, you had to get used to getting your hair brushed. my mom didn't play the tears, screaming or moving around like that. Granted, she wasn't as harsh as this woman, but my mama wasn't having a tended-headed child.

I think stuff like this happens all the time
Originally Posted by scrills
I think it happens a lot too. But I still don't think it's right (not saying you think it is or not).

I feel bad for that little girl. The person video taping is as mean as the mother.
3b | low-normal porosity (still confused, definitely not high porosity) | med to coarse texture

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I was natural my enire childhood (i didn't relax until i went to college) and that in my opinion was abuse plain and simple. I was (and still am) a tenderheaded person. I cryed while getting my hair done (and still do), but my mother also did everything in her power to lessen my suffering. And when she lost patience, she would send me off to a friend, relative, and even her high school students that could braid hair to get it braided so that I wouldn't have to go through that everyday. I was never treated like that all for the sake of getting my hair done.

It amazes me the number of black folks that think that this is "ok" because it happened to them. IT IS NOT OK. Just because momma did it to you and you turned out ok does not make it right!

This child is being cursed at, hit, belittled, tossed around like a rag doll, yanked by her arms, thrown on the ground, sat on and then to top it all off...there are other people laughing at her, teasing her, and then recording it? This "mother" doesn't seem to even be concerned that she is hurting her child...she seems to in some sick kinda way enjoy it. Then to top it all off, she keeps telling the child that her hair is nappy, and she's trying to fix it so she will "look like somebody". And we wonder why so many black women have the hair issues that they do.

I think what really pisses me off...is that obviously, they have internet access...there doesn't seem to be a technology divide here (i mean they recorded this video). And the person that recorded this has youtube access. So you mean to tell me that none of these ignorant mofo's thought to do a search for natural hair videos? There are literally TONS of them on youtube! Hell they could have even used google and found tons of information to eduate themselves on how to make caring for this childs hair less painful.

But instead, they get thier jollies off by making fun of the pain and tarma of a child. How phucking sick and twisted.
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Huh. I may be ignorant, but why does she keep on brushing it??? It looked brushed out to me...

I only watched half of it, and with no sound...thankfully...
Originally Posted by brown_eyedgal20
No you aren't ignorant, you would be ignorant if you saw a point to this video or could see some value to what she was doing. TO reiterate what Nappy Curly has said it could be even more confusing if you watched it without sound becuase the amazingly obvious verbal abuse combined with the blatant physical abuse is what makes it come together. This was meant to be abusive, this woman does not like this little girl and WANTS to hurt her.

Oh and I can talk, please don't believe all kinky hair detangling has to hurt or has to be this bad. My mother had NO idea how to do my natural hair but she never hit me or treated me like this. But once we leqarned the proper technique there was no pain whatsoever and I have a very kinky hair type. Hitting a child is abuse. Cussing a child out is abuse. Telling a child that they are nobody and they have no daddy is abuse. Let's see what specifically in this videos is abuse becuase physical and verbal abuse ran rampant and some people are trying to defend it or can't see it:

1. (Attempting to) Running a comb from root to tip in kinky/curly hair that is pretty much dry. If you have the technology to upoad a video on youtube.com you know how to look up how to properly detangle kinky/curly hair on the internet.

2. Ignoring genuine screams of pain. (I don't know how any one can mistake pain for a tantrum. I know some kids act up and I can tell the difference). This child screamed WHEN the comb ran through her head is a good clue (and cried tears the rest) there is a difference. She ain't faking.

3. Telling a child they are nobody. This is in there (I gotta get rid of these naps to make you somebody).

4. Telling a child screaming for their daddy that they have no daddy.

5. Cussing a child out repeatedly.

6. Pinning a child on the floor and attacking them.

7. At one point not even making the barest effort to to pretend you were trying to detangle her hair. Insterad letting your true intent and purpose slip through by doing nothing but stabbing her head for a full minute.

8. Check out background scenery. Granted this takes some intuitive ability and/or experience of abusive situations but I'm sure most people can see it if they try.

~There is a boy child of same age whose hair looks well taken care of (defined curls, shiny, long) and at no point is being treated as bad. This woman know how to do hair and treat children. She has a PERSONAL vendetta against the little girl. This theory is supprted by the fact that most of us can see this child has a hair type that naturally curls when wet and would LOOK exactly like the little boys if the woman hadn't combed it out. Nothing wrong with nappy hair (as we know well) but this girls' hair isn't nappy. But at various point she refers to girls' hair as nappy in derogative way and little boy's hair as "curly". She has something against this little girl to create a division, a difference that doesn't exist. I would be willing to bet that when it comes time for the boy's turn this evil woman takes her time, goes gentle and reiterates the whole time (in the little girl's hearing) that he has GOOD hair, he's such a good boy for not being a brat like his sister. I wish I didn't know the mind of people like this but I have met entirely too many mothers or step moms who were pros at pyschologically breaking a certain child down. Picking favorites and the ones they hate and breaking the ones they hate down at every opportunity. I could never see what makes them so hate one of their children and lavish love on the others but it happens.

~She has on weave and is darker skinned. So is camera woman (as seen from myspace pics). Little girl is lighter skinned (possibly mixed) and has long hair. Anyone with a knowledge of history of colorism ,etc can see there is something going on here with jealousy.

~This one breaks my heart. Look closely (or even not so closely) and you can see there are huge chunks of hair missing at little girls' temples (also note not present on little's boy har who has simliar hair type). This is called traction alopecia and happens becuase of pressure on the hair line. This happens over a LONG period of time. I know becuase I had it from wearing sew in weave for 2 YEARS nonstop. Probably a result of many many "detangling" sessions like this one. Forcing weave on the little girl or pulling her hair back in repeated buns like the one at the very end. Did you see that? I'm surprised I couldn't see the little girls hair lines popping out before our very eyes, that thing was so tight. This more than anything indicated to me this is systematic abuse that has gone on for months/years so the excuses for this woman that every now and then you might lose your temper DON'T hold up.

~Several people have said they can see a bruise on one of the girl eyes. This along with past experience tells me this abuse doesn't end at the end of hair detangling time. This kind of abuse is probably 24/7.

9. The anger and hate in momma's voice increases as she is reminded of the father. She also combs even more roughly. She is taking out anger at child's father on the daughter.

10. Pulling child up at several points BY her hair.

11. Taunting little girl throughout with something she wants, holding it out of her reach (I couldn't see what it is) and making fun of her (her pain, her hair, and the fact that you have something she wants) throughout. Now to be fair I'm sure siblings of a like age might do something like this to each other. But what say to me this isn't just all in fun is this is a 17 YEAR OLD (the camera woman) taunting a girl who can't be no more than 4. At some point an age difference goes from "messing around" to abuse and they are way past that line.

12. Having done something that would make a child of that age scream they hate you. I don't think I even knew the word hate then.

13. And finally laughing and smiling while the above is ocurring. If you are frustrated you don't smile. And at no point would a good parent smile at ANY of what happened above. This woman is malicious.

14. Oh yeah filming the whole thing and posting it on youtube.com so others can enjoy it as much as you did.

Yeah there is always the danger it won't make a difference but then I guess it comes down to the fact that I couldn't live with myself if I DIDN'T report it.


My Fotki

Last edited by KinkyKeeper; 07-18-2009 at 05:06 PM.
I hope someone finds her, teases her hair within an inch of it's life, sprays it down with an entire can of 80's style aqua net, then see how tender headed she is. ****ing *****! Ideally, I'd like her to have a weeks worth of bedhead before brushing it out. But the teasing and aqua net will do in a pinch.

Last edited by cympreni; 03-06-2010 at 09:22 AM.
http://www.zshare.net/video/62779444b5783af3/

This was posted on LHC forum.

I hope something gets done.
3b | low-normal porosity (still confused, definitely not high porosity) | med to coarse texture

Co-Wash: most any silicone free V05 or Suave | RO: GVP Cond. Balm, GVP Joico K Pak, Tresemme Naturals Moisutrizing Cond., SheaMoisture Shea Butter Restorative Cond. | LI: one of my rinse outs | DT: one of my rinse outs with oil | Stylers: BRHG
This brought me back to my own childhood, sadly. My mother would smack me with the hairbrush when I cried and wouldn't hold still. I remember a first grade teacher reporting my mother after a lice inspection that we had in school because my scalp had so many brush marks. Damn, that video took me straight back.

But, this woman is taking it to such a further extreme, and I am surprised that some of the Youtube comments are in support of the mother, assuming that the negative comments must not be from black people.

The attitude, the cursing, ignoring that screaming, and the laughing and comments from the person recording it are all abusive, IMO.
Originally Posted by redcelticcurls
happened to me too and i agree.
I was a very little girl (5?) and was friendly with an AA couple that lived across the street from my grandparents in the Memphis area delta. Now, my grandparents were poor farmers, but the family across the street were dirt, dirt poor sharecroppers. They were an older couple and their children had all left home but their grandchildren would visit and that's how I came to be acquainted with them.

Their house had no indoor plumbing and when the kids would visit, grandma would fill up a big tub with water and bathe the kids on the front porch. I would stand across the street and watch because I found the whole process fascinating and quite honestly, was a bit envious of how much fun it would be to take a bath in a big ol' tub on the front porch. I was from the city and had never seen such a thing.

Everything would go along fine until the grandma took out a steel comb and started combing the kids hair. I assume she was trying to be as gentle as possible because she always seemed to be a kind grandmother, but goodness, those kids would holler and carry on while grandma would console them and alternatively scold them for wiggling and crying. She never hit them or seemed unnecessarily rough. At the end of the process, she'd braid their hair into tiny rows.

This was in the mid 60's and I guess the grandparents were born probably around 1910 (just guessing). After their bath, they would wave me over and I would get to play with the kids until it got dark outside.

My goodness, the video of this little girl's pain is very disturbing to me.
Here is information some women found about her. Hehe, these ladies don't play. Love it.



The young girl taping the video: Here name is Temperance.

She is 17 years old, and lives in Detroit.

They apparently live either in or near Saint Clair Shores, Michigan.

Her area code is 313 (Which lead back to Detroit, Michigan when I googled it)

She puts important info in her accounts (For instance, her espinthebottle.com page name is "Temp313": Her name in short, and her area code) Here's a link to her page: espin.com/people/temp313

Her mother's name may be "Tiffany"

The little girl's name may be "Autumn"

Here's the link to the actual video(I downloaded it for evidence, just in case!:
http://www.zshare.net/video/627262554f524ffa/

The officer I contacted can be reached from this number: 586-445-5300

I reported it already, but there is strength in numbers!


My Fotki
1st pic - Mom's pinky is atop a rather big bald patch at her nape. ETA: Also look at the area behind and ontop of the child's ear. Reminds me traction alopecia from too tight micro braids.
2nd and 3rd pic - This child's hairline is ruined.








WTF!


My Fotki
Thanks for posting the contact info!

This was in my head all day at work yesterday, and I thought about here when I woke up.

Reading other forums and sites that talk about this video, I am more saddened by the view some propose that "Hey, that's how it is. The girl just needs to be quiet."
Kiva! Microfinance works.

Med/Coarse, porous curly.
Thanks for posting the contact info!

This was in my head all day at work yesterday, and I thought about here when I woke up.

Reading other forums and sites that talk about this video, I am more saddened by the view some propose that "Hey, that's how it is. The girl just needs to be quiet."
Originally Posted by redcelticcurls
I know! I visited LHC forum and there they are all concerned but someone linked to a cafemom.com thread and there it's horrible!
3b | low-normal porosity (still confused, definitely not high porosity) | med to coarse texture

Co-Wash: most any silicone free V05 or Suave | RO: GVP Cond. Balm, GVP Joico K Pak, Tresemme Naturals Moisutrizing Cond., SheaMoisture Shea Butter Restorative Cond. | LI: one of my rinse outs | DT: one of my rinse outs with oil | Stylers: BRHG
Thanks for posting the contact info!

This was in my head all day at work yesterday, and I thought about here when I woke up.

Reading other forums and sites that talk about this video, I am more saddened by the view some propose that "Hey, that's how it is. The girl just needs to be quiet."
Originally Posted by redcelticcurls
I know! I visited LHC forum and there they are all concerned but someone linked to a cafemom.com thread and there it's horrible!
Originally Posted by Residual
Yeah, it was the cafemom thread that really ticked me off.

ETA: I did like this video response.
Kiva! Microfinance works.

Med/Coarse, porous curly.

Last edited by redcelticcurls; 07-19-2009 at 01:41 PM.
Thanks for posting the contact info!

This was in my head all day at work yesterday, and I thought about here when I woke up.

Reading other forums and sites that talk about this video, I am more saddened by the view some propose that "Hey, that's how it is. The girl just needs to be quiet."
Originally Posted by redcelticcurls
I know! I visited LHC forum and there they are all concerned but someone linked to a cafemom.com thread and there it's horrible!
Originally Posted by Residual
Yeah, it was the cafemom thread that really ticked me off.

ETA: I did like this video response.
Originally Posted by redcelticcurls
I watched that as well, it is very good.
3b | low-normal porosity (still confused, definitely not high porosity) | med to coarse texture

Co-Wash: most any silicone free V05 or Suave | RO: GVP Cond. Balm, GVP Joico K Pak, Tresemme Naturals Moisutrizing Cond., SheaMoisture Shea Butter Restorative Cond. | LI: one of my rinse outs | DT: one of my rinse outs with oil | Stylers: BRHG

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