Is there an unspoken upper age limit...

sinistral55
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If I saw someone over 45 at a club I'd probably laugh my a$$ off. Honestly, I would. There's nothing quite as tacky as a 50-something granny and her cackling old girlfriends trying to get it on with the 20-something men. I laugh equally hard when the old pervy bachelors (40+) go trolling clubs trying to look "cool" for the college girls. Ahahaha! I love it: "Can I buy you a drink, beautiful?" Hahaha, thanks grandpa...but NO.

Women in the 35-45 range I'd raise an eyebrow at or roll my eyes. I might think "go somewhere else" if they're being overly obnoxious as a group.
Originally Posted by TK*

That's not fair. I think most of us on here who do go out, have absolutely NO desire to hang out with kids of your ilk, trust and believe . Most of the folks my age who still go out sometimes 1) only do it every once in a while; 2) are ready to pack it up and go home pretty early; and 3) avoid the "young" places like the plague.

But I see nothing wrong with going somewhere nice, listening to music and dancing with people of your own age--if I ever do go out now, it's somewhere like that.

Passed out drunk on the sidewalks in a pool of piss and vomit, passed out drunk on the club couches with no skirt on, pseudo-screwing on the dance floor, club fights---NOT cute anymore. No thanks, we old folks will pass.

Life doesn't stop at 30, although this youth-obsessed culture would have one think otherwise.

Last edited by sinistral55; 09-18-2009 at 09:01 AM.
If I saw someone over 45 at a club I'd probably laugh my a$$ off. Honestly, I would. There's nothing quite as tacky as a 50-something granny and her cackling old girlfriends trying to get it on with the 20-something men. I laugh equally hard when the old pervy bachelors (40+) go trolling clubs trying to look "cool" for the college girls. Ahahaha! I love it: "Can I buy you a drink, beautiful?" Hahaha, thanks grandpa...but NO.

Women in the 35-45 range I'd raise an eyebrow at or roll my eyes. I might think "go somewhere else" if they're being overly obnoxious as a group.
Originally Posted by TK*

You should print this post out to save to read when you are 50. You'll find out between now and then that most 50 year old women are still vibrant and love to have fun, and they don't really feel any different inside than you do right now, as a young snot.
Where I live I see people clubbing aged from about 14 to 60 years. Yes, 14, the legal age is 18 but so many young teenagers look and behave a lot older they get in and served alcohol (door staff are not always that strict when it comes to checking ID). I've also seen up to 60-ish out clubbing. I'd say on a normal night out it's about 50% under 35 and 40% over 35, the last 10% are underage.

I don't really think about what the older ones are doing out clubbing, they have as much right to be there as anyone else over 18.
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Last edited by curlylaura; 09-18-2009 at 09:31 AM.
i just turned 27 a two weeks ago. there is a really trendy martini bar/club right by my house so whenever i feel the need to relive my "glory years" (ages 21-24) i go there because its convenient. its a 21+ establishment but i feel too old to be there.

the last time i went there were a few outliers and i was thinking, "who's nana is that?!" when i first saw a golden girls-esque duo. but that quickly changed to "go nana! go nana!" because those two were tearing up the dancefloor and having a great time.

in all my clubbing experience it seems like the older women go there to have a good time and dance while the older men go to patrol for young girls. in all my years i can honestly say ive never seen an older man at a place that 20-somethings go to ever on the dance floor. theyre always lurking around trying to buy someone a drink.
I like this video....

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NRGuGWkxTf4

If I was in my 20's I wouldn't want people my parent's age at the club I was going to and I definitely wouldn't want someone my Mom's age hooking up with someone my age.

The places for older people play either the oldies or jazz. Some of us like the new music and like to dance to it.
Originally Posted by Lotsawaves
Those things seem contradictory.

If you were in your 20s, you wouldn't want someone your age NOW in the clubs, but you don't like the places for older people and prefer to go dance where there's younger music? So other people your age shouldn't be there, but it's ok for you?

And haven't you posted about going out with your daughters?

I'm not understanding where you're going with this.
i think it depends on the club and the location and the intention.

if its a club that is known for younger clientele because they are the only ones that go, it might look funny.

it would be great to find a club that caters specifically to you and your age group, but that does not always exist! when i lived in Syracuse NY for school, it was a totally mixed croud because there werent places specifically for one croud. there was one place, Daisy Dukes- obviously country, but they had a mechanical bull, so we went in sometimes.

and as far as intention- like, if your older, dressed like a stripper looking extremely desperate, you might get laughs and stares.

but like i said, just because someone is older, doesnt mean they can't go out and enjoy the music and enjoy other peoples company. just like it isn't right for women who have children to not go to specific places because they have children.
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I like this video....

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NRGuGWkxTf4

If I was in my 20's I wouldn't want people my parent's age at the club I was going to and I definitely wouldn't want someone my Mom's age hooking up with someone my age.

The places for older people play either the oldies or jazz. Some of us like the new music and like to dance to it.
Originally Posted by Lotsawaves
Those things seem contradictory.

If you were in your 20s, you wouldn't want someone your age NOW in the clubs, but you don't like the places for older people and prefer to go dance where there's younger music? So other people your age shouldn't be there, but it's ok for you?

And haven't you posted about going out with your daughters?

I'm not understanding where you're going with this.
Originally Posted by CGNYC
+1

I thought maybe I was being obtuse.

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If I saw someone over 45 at a club I'd probably laugh my a$$ off. Honestly, I would. There's nothing quite as tacky as a 50-something granny and her cackling old girlfriends trying to get it on with the 20-something men. I laugh equally hard when the old pervy bachelors (40+) go trolling clubs trying to look "cool" for the college girls. Ahahaha! I love it: "Can I buy you a drink, beautiful?" Hahaha, thanks grandpa...but NO.

Women in the 35-45 range I'd raise an eyebrow at or roll my eyes. I might think "go somewhere else" if they're being overly obnoxious as a group.
Originally Posted by TK*
Ah, don't be too hard on TK everyone...she's only 20, and I did encourage brutal honesty and unpopular opinion. I felt the same way when I was your age, but, yes, now that I am twice your age, amazingly, I have found that I still feel like that 20 yr old on the inside, so I suspect your perspective may also be a little different when you are in your 40s.

I'm not asking this for myself. As mentioned above by someone else, I have no desire to hang out in clubs and hook up with anyone in this age group (speaking of obnoxious), even though I have friends in their 20s and 30s. There is no void in my life that doing so would fill.

I have an acquaintance who likes to go clubbing. She is 40 and is very pretty and youthful, but, like most of us "youthful" looking older women, if you put her next to most 25 yr olds, you can immediately see the difference. She has a subtle weathered look that is unmistakably age-related. I applaud her enthusiasm and confidence but just wanted to hear some opinions because I can't imagine even wanting to go the clubs she goes to. Since I don't go out with her, I don't know how she acts when she is there...whether she is trying to hook up with younger guys, simply dance and have a good time, or find her next husband.

Ten years ago after my 15-yr HS reunion, a group of us wanted to continue the party, so we took it to a local nightclub. Yep, we probably looked like a bunch of overdressed (it was in a small town--very casual, relaxed dress code) "old" fools, but we stuck to our group, we stayed to ourselves, and we had a blast. If anyone was laughing at us, we were so busy laughing ourselves that we didn't notice. I ran into an old acquaintance--a much younger guy who still lived there--not from school--and he danced with me until I left. So, I guess I wasn't looking too old that night.

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If I saw someone over 45 at a club I'd probably laugh my a$$ off. Honestly, I would. There's nothing quite as tacky as a 50-something granny and her cackling old girlfriends trying to get it on with the 20-something men. I laugh equally hard when the old pervy bachelors (40+) go trolling clubs trying to look "cool" for the college girls. Ahahaha! I love it: "Can I buy you a drink, beautiful?" Hahaha, thanks grandpa...but NO.

Women in the 35-45 range I'd raise an eyebrow at or roll my eyes. I might think "go somewhere else" if they're being overly obnoxious as a group.
Originally Posted by TK*

You should print this post out to save to read when you are 50. You'll find out between now and then that most 50 year old women are still vibrant and love to have fun, and they don't really feel any different inside than you do right now, as a young snot.
Originally Posted by RedCatWaves

Yep, most of us old grannies (I'm 8 years older than the group you're making fun of above, so I guess I'm plumb dead) have absolutely no desire to hang out with you and only look down our noses at you 'young snots', LOL. I prefer to let you have your own place to be "totally obnoxious as a group".

As Trennell says, we like music from when we were your age. You'll be the same - just think, you'll be listening to that . . . stuff your whole life! Kidding - I like a lot of it. I also have to admit I hate a lot of it, too. The good stuff will stand the test of time.

I actually like to go to places that have a good mix of all sorts of music and dancing from the past 45 years with a good mix of people of all ages, (ETA: although there aren't very many around. The ones that are aren't clubs, per se, but usually more tavern/pub type places.) The old, desperate stripper look would get just as many looks and nudges at any of the places I'd go as at any under-21 club!
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Last edited by auntnett; 09-18-2009 at 02:23 PM.
like most of us "youthful" looking older women, if you put her next to most 25 yr olds, you can immediately see the difference.
Yeah, I think a lot of people miss this. I look pretty good for 36, and in my head I look the same as when I was 25...but stand me next to real live 25 year old and you can see the difference. Hell, even if I look better I still look older.

Two nights ago I watch Seinfeld and then last night I watched The New Adventures of Old Christine. Julie Louis-Dryfus (mangled her name, sorry) looks AMAZING. AMAZING for any age. I think she's beautiful. She looks even better than she did on Seinfeld (this was an early episode, even) but side by side, you can see she's older.
...for clubbing, in your opinion? Do you have your own personal unspoken, unofficial clubbing age limit? I mean for nightclubs that are clearly frequented by the under 35 crowd.

Not an "age limit" as in: shouldn't be admitted into the club, but just that age where you quietly think to yourself: He/She looks too old to be here or pathetic.

Unpopular and brutally honest opinions encouraged.

This is just an "out of curiosity" question, BTW.
Originally Posted by ~Ghost Poster~
I don't think there's a limit, but there are different types of clubs. I don't know of any under-35 clubs - that's a huge range. At least where I live (and our drinking age is lower) there'll be clubs that are mostly the 18 or 19 up to 23 or 24-ish clubs, and yeah, a 40 y-o might look and feel out of place there. Then there are clubs for the older 20s-early 30s, and clubs that are more 30s and 40s, and people older than that who still club probably are thought of as pathetic and tend to go to more "sleazy" type lounge places. However the "specialty" clubs (ie. Black clubs or Latin clubs) tend to have a range of ages and you'll see teens to 50s there and it's not weird.

But personally I really don't care - do what you want. The main thing that curtailed my clubbing was having a baby, otherwise I'd probably go more.
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like most of us "youthful" looking older women, if you put her next to most 25 yr olds, you can immediately see the difference.
Yeah, I think a lot of people miss this. I look pretty good for 36, and in my head I look the same as when I was 25...but stand me next to real live 25 year old and you can see the difference. Hell, even if I look better I still look older.
Originally Posted by CGNYC
But when it's 4 AM, the liquors been flowing, and you're in a dark room with flashing lights... how many people are really going to be able to tell the difference? LOL!
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like most of us "youthful" looking older women, if you put her next to most 25 yr olds, you can immediately see the difference.
Yeah, I think a lot of people miss this. I look pretty good for 36, and in my head I look the same as when I was 25...but stand me next to real live 25 year old and you can see the difference. Hell, even if I look better I still look older.
Originally Posted by CGNYC
But when it's 4 AM, the liquors been flowing, and you're in a dark room with flashing lights... how many people are really going to be able to tell the difference? LOL!
Originally Posted by Gemini13
Well...as an older woman who does look good for her age, possibly even younger...I have to say...we do not keep well into the wee hours of the morning. It takes a lot of maintenance for this 47 year old to look younger, and, like Cinderella, my hard work starts to expire after midnight.
I like this video....

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NRGuGWkxTf4

If I was in my 20's I wouldn't want people my parent's age at the club I was going to and I definitely wouldn't want someone my Mom's age hooking up with someone my age.

The places for older people play either the oldies or jazz. Some of us like the new music and like to dance to it.
Originally Posted by Lotsawaves
Those things seem contradictory.

If you were in your 20s, you wouldn't want someone your age NOW in the clubs, but you don't like the places for older people and prefer to go dance where there's younger music? So other people your age shouldn't be there, but it's ok for you?

And haven't you posted about going out with your daughters?

I'm not understanding where you're going with this.
Originally Posted by CGNYC
What I'm saying is that, we older women, would like to have a place to enjoy more current music without having to be in the same environment as younger people.

I've gone out with my one daughter twice. Once was at a bachelorette party, which I had 2 of my friends, my age, with me and once when the neighborhood went clubbing. The ages ranged from 30 to 60 both times.

Not sure what your problem is with this.
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Not sure what your problem is with this.
Originally Posted by Lotsawaves
It's not having a problem with it, so much as trying to understand what you were saying.

First you said - If I was in my 20's I wouldn't want people my parent's age at the club I was going to.

Then you said - The places for older people play either the oldies or jazz. Some of us like the new music and like to dance to it.

Which was, as CGNYC said, rather contradictory. We were merely trying to understand if you are ok with older people going clubbing (which you said you were) or if you are not ok with it (which you also said you were).

ETA: to shorten a really long quoted post.
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Last edited by gekko422; 09-18-2009 at 12:10 PM.
What I'm saying is that, we older women, would like to have a place to enjoy more current music without having to be in the same environment as younger people.
Ohhhh. I just didn't understand where you were going with it and when I type it out it makes even less sense so eh, I get it now. You don't want to hang out with young people, there should be better places for people who aren't 25 and younger. Check.
OK, let me try this again.

I don't want to go clubbing where there are 20 year olds and I don't think they want the older crowd there, either.

I wish there were places for older people that would play more current music. I don't like country music, but the places that play this kind of music is pretty much a mixed age group. I, also, don't care for jazz which draws a mixed age group. I like the oldies, but like I said, I also like the current music. There is no where for older people to go to enjoy the current music without there being a very young crowd. We don't care to be around them and they think we are hilarious and pathetic if we go there.

I, once, went to a place that catered to 40 year olds and up and it was ridiculous. People were on the dance floor doing the twist.

Because of this, I don't go clubbing. Like I said I went twice in a group for occassions. I haven't done it again.
From Michael Berg:

Every person has a unique connection to the Creator that can never be extinguished, and every person has a great soul that can manifest important things in our world. To make a person feel less than they are because of something inside themselves, be it faith, race, or sexual orientation, is the greatest sin of all."
What I'm saying is that, we older women, would like to have a place to enjoy more current music without having to be in the same environment as younger people.
Ohhhh. I just didn't understand where you were going with it and when I type it out it makes even less sense so eh, I get it now. You don't want to hang out with young people, there should be better places for people who aren't 25 and younger. Check.
Originally Posted by CGNYC
We must have been typing at the same time. Glad you get it now.
From Michael Berg:

Every person has a unique connection to the Creator that can never be extinguished, and every person has a great soul that can manifest important things in our world. To make a person feel less than they are because of something inside themselves, be it faith, race, or sexual orientation, is the greatest sin of all."
I love house music (progressive house, dirty house, tribal, etc.). I'm 37 and have gone out a couple of times in the past year...no one looked at me twice (well, except for the boys trying to hit on me, but that's besides the point). I'm sure they didn't think I was pushing 40, though.

The way I see it, my favorite DJ, Danny Tenaglia, is 47. So these youngins are whooping him up can just go ahead with themselves, and leave me to my little space on the dance floor. If they don't want "old" folks there, then the DJ would have to go too!

If I saw someone over 45 at a club I'd probably laugh my a$$ off. Honestly, I would. There's nothing quite as tacky as a 50-something granny and her cackling old girlfriends trying to get it on with the 20-something men. I laugh equally hard when the old pervy bachelors (40+) go trolling clubs trying to look "cool" for the college girls. Ahahaha! I love it: "Can I buy you a drink, beautiful?" Hahaha, thanks grandpa...but NO.

Women in the 35-45 range I'd raise an eyebrow at or roll my eyes. I might think "go somewhere else" if they're being overly obnoxious as a group.
Originally Posted by TK*
Ah, don't be too hard on TK everyone...she's only 20, and I did encourage brutal honesty and unpopular opinion. I felt the same way when I was your age, but, yes, now that I am twice your age, amazingly, I have found that I still feel like that 20 yr old on the inside, so I suspect your perspective may also be a little different when you are in your 40s.
Originally Posted by ~Ghost Poster~
Thank you, GP. Those getting upset took my post personally when really, they shouldn't have. I'm a "snot" apparently for stating my opinion, lol. Honestly, it amuses me, lol.

No one is saying your life should stop at 35. By all means, get drunk and crazy if that's what you're into. However going to a club that is MEANT for a younger crowd will make you look ridiculous, and yeah, the 20+ crowd will probably laugh at you. If you have enough balls to wear that outfit you're too old for, to go to a club for people half your age, to dance with guys old enough to be your sons, then who really cares if you get laughs??? Do what makes you happy! You'll probably be the laugh of my evening, but why should you care if you're having a good time? You had enough balls to show up to the club so you should have enough balls to ignore/brush off what others think of you being there!

Do what makes you happy and be done with it!
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