When to buy your daughter's first training bra/undershirt?

My little girl just turned 9 and started 4th grade. I had been noticing changes in her body all summer (she thinned out but her hips and butt changed, she needs to wear deodorant) and knew it was only a matter of time before I saw little mosquito bites. I also developed at her age and know how hard it can be. Do I start now by getting her undershirts or wait a few more months until it's necessary for a real training bra? Her best friend is wearing undershirts now so convincing her might not be that hard. She already talks about how she doesn't want to wear a bra and she has always been uncomfortable layering clothes. Do I ease her into this transition now or wait? If I decide to start her now what do I get? Regular undershirts or tighter bra-like ones?
High Priestess JessMess, follower of the Goddess of the Coiling Way and Confiscator of Concoctions in the Order of the Curly Crusaders

I guess I'm not sure why she would need a training bra as soon as she starts to develop. I didn't wear one right away. And I always wore undershirts as a little girl, so that wasn't an issue. Actually, I continued to wear them for some time after I had my first training bras- I developed young too and felt really self-conscious, especially on gym days, of being one of the only girls with a bra on.

My suggestion is to get her some undershirts- might as well be the regular, more comfortable kind for now. She'll probably be able to use them for a while yet.
Brooklyn, NY

Hair: 3A/B, Underlayer of 2B
HG products:
Winter- Giovanni Tea Tree (co-wash) & 50/50 (condish); Curl Junkie Curl Assurance Leave-In; Curls Milkshake & Quenched Curls; Re:coil; BRHG
Summer: DevaCurl No Poo & OneC; CK; Re:coil; BRHG; Honey!!!

fotki pw= crrrls
My little girl just turned 9 and started 4th grade. I had been noticing changes in her body all summer (she thinned out but her hips and butt changed, she needs to wear deodorant) and knew it was only a matter of time before I saw little mosquito bites. I also developed at her age and know how hard it can be. Do I start now by getting her undershirts or wait a few more months until it's necessary for a real training bra? Her best friend is wearing undershirts now so convincing her might not be that hard. She already talks about how she doesn't want to wear a bra and she has always been uncomfortable layering clothes. Do I ease her into this transition now or wait? If I decide to start her now what do I get? Regular undershirts or tighter bra-like ones?
Originally Posted by Jess the Mess
I'm not sure what you mean by "undershirts." I wore undershirts since I was an infant until my friends started making fun of me about it in 3rd grade. I wore them as an extra layer to keep from getting too cold in the winter...they had nothing to do w/ developing breasts (not for me, anyway)

I got my first training bra when I was 9 (5th grade) and first got mosquito bites. But I really didn't need to wear a bra, training or otherwise. I just had a couple of them b/c it was the thing to do. I wore them on special occasions just for fun until I was 12 and started wearing them everyday b/c it was starting to look too obvious when I didn't.
3b (with 3c tendencies) on modified CG

I remember this time in my daughters lives. They grow up so fast. My oldest was telling me her chest was bothering her and I thought nothing of it until she showed me. I was like Wow, she is starting to get boobies. I got her an undershirt, then got her a training bra later on. Just get her whatever will hide the nipples and make her comfortable.
From Michael Berg:

Every person has a unique connection to the Creator that can never be extinguished, and every person has a great soul that can manifest important things in our world. To make a person feel less than they are because of something inside themselves, be it faith, race, or sexual orientation, is the greatest sin of all."
My mom got me undershirts at the end of grade 3. I had my first training bra in 4th grade.

I remember these days. What a stressful time. I got my period two months before I turned 10 (in 4th grade, over Christmas break).

You know what I would do (as extreme as it sounds)? Get her some undershirts, and then put her in every team sport she can manage to work off as much body fat as possible. Maybe this will buy her another year? LOL

I wish my parents would have put me in more team sports for physical exercise. I really think this would have stopped puberty from coming so soon for me. I played soccer, but by that time it was just playground stuff. Nothing hardcore. I really think strenuous exercise would have delayed things until maybe grade 6.

"In the depth of winter, I finally learned that within me there lay an invincible summer."

4a, mbl, low porosity, normal thickness, fine hair.
My daughter is 11, so we've been going through this for a couple years. She has hardly anything and doesn't really need a bra for support, but she's felt like she needed some "coverage" (for high-beams) since she first got breast buds. So, I got her some little training bras (actually more like half t-shirts with a little elastic at the bottom) a couple years ago, then moved on to sports-like bras (still very much like half t-shirts).

We just had our first real-bra shopping trip last week. It was very fun, and they make bras so damn cute in size 30A. Then we went out to lunch and had a manicure together. I'm trying to make becoming-a-woman an enjoyable journey for her.
Undershirts are definitely a great place to start. I took a cue from my daughter at around 9 or 10 years of age because I could see the start of development and actually she asked about wanting to wear another layer under her blouses and shirts. My daughter is very slight and at that age, it was hard to find even a training bra that fit her small frame.

And it is very discouraging to find that anymore, the pre-teens lingerie department is looking an awful lot like a Victoria's Secret. I am not exaggerating (I wish I was.) Who markets thongs and padded push-up bras to pre-teens?!?

UGH!!!!!!

Good luck and just keep listening to your daughter -- she will let you know when she is ready for her first training bra.

If I remember correctly, Target was where I purchased her undershirts. They had a great selection, so I would try looking there with her and let her pick some things out.
Make sure to tell her she doesn't have to sleep in it.

What?? Nobody told me!

My game plan (tho I have boys and the issues differ) is to talk to them about stuff in ADVANCE so they know whats coming and are prepared and desensitized (another thing nobody did for me). I just had the masturbation talk with my son yesterday; altho he isnt "there" yet, he's on the cusp and I want him to know the facts and not be embarrassed or self conscious or think theres something wrong with him!

I know its off topic, but do you see the logic??
Curls,Coils,Waves & WhatKnot
3miii/My HGs tame bulk&frizz/Give definition w/o crunch
My Photobucket Album
And it is very discouraging to find that anymore, the pre-teens lingerie department is looking an awful lot like a Victoria's Secret. I am not exaggerating (I wish I was.) Who markets thongs and padded push-up bras to pre-teens?!?
Originally Posted by misspam

Sears had a very nice selection of pre-teen underwear. Bras in beautiful fabrics, but without all the padding and underwire and junk. We didn't get any matching underwear. She still likes her little white cotton granny panties, and I'm keeping her like that as long as I can.
And it is very discouraging to find that anymore, the pre-teens lingerie department is looking an awful lot like a Victoria's Secret. I am not exaggerating (I wish I was.) Who markets thongs and padded push-up bras to pre-teens?!?
Originally Posted by misspam

Sears had a very nice selection of pre-teen underwear. Bras in beautiful fabrics, but without all the padding and underwire and junk. We didn't get any matching underwear. She still likes her little white cotton granny panties, and I'm keeping her like that as long as I can.
Originally Posted by RedCatWaves
I'm not sure whether or not we went into a Sears.

I was so appalled the last time we went to Kohl's, though. My god! The padding, the lace, the bright fancy colors and designs. This stuff looked appropriate for a French hooker, but not for my 15 year old daughter. Even she was seriously ooged out. She is still a 30A, so shopping in the women's department is very hit or miss. When we found a few that fit, Maidenform I think, we scooped up 4 of them. Plain. Beige.
.

Last edited by cakj99; 04-26-2010 at 07:02 PM.
And it is very discouraging to find that anymore, the pre-teens lingerie department is looking an awful lot like a Victoria's Secret. I am not exaggerating (I wish I was.) Who markets thongs and padded push-up bras to pre-teens?!?
Originally Posted by misspam

Sears had a very nice selection of pre-teen underwear. Bras in beautiful fabrics, but without all the padding and underwire and junk. We didn't get any matching underwear. She still likes her little white cotton granny panties, and I'm keeping her like that as long as I can.
Originally Posted by RedCatWaves
Yikes! I thought underwire was a bad idea for girls who were still developing, anyway.
"Maybe Lucy's right. Of all the Charlie Browns in the world, you're the Charlie Browniest."--Linus, A Charlie Brown Christmas
-----------------------------------------------
My fotki: http://public.fotki.com/nynaeve77/
Password: orphanannie
I remember being in 5th grade, and being sooooo jealous of girls with training bras. I didn't need one, but I really wanted one.

I never did the undershirt thing, so I don't know about that...
My daugher got her first "training" bra in 4th grade. She was starting with the mosquito bites and I just hated that look--they are so just pointy at that age and I think very very noticable by others. I didn't want her to get teased or anything.

I went to Target and we got the sports "bra" looking things which were really like cut off undershirts. My daughter normally doesn't care too much about clothes (or showers or deoderant but that is another story!) refused undershirts..they made her far too hot and she did not like layering either. This is probably influence by the fact we are in SoCal and it's just too hot here for those some of the time and the rest it's not really cold enough for them.

Anyway these came in S,M,L,XL and worked great. My daughter is now 12 and taller than me and it would appear, developmentally, that she may have inherited my families, shall we say, generous endowment. It completely skipped me but is very prevalent in the rest of the family. Now she is in a 36B. She is pretty barrel chested like me so needs the bigger size. I wasn't a 36B until high school.

So I vote to get her a couple in some cute colors and make it a treat for her (love the idea above about making it a special girl time--I did that for my daughter's first period..played hookey from work and we went to lunch and shopping..great fun!)

Good luck!
FIA 2c/3aFi

Done experimenting! Loving Spiral Solutions products!

Blog: http://thewavytales.blogspot.com/
I was about ten or eleven when I started feeling alot of tenderness. I remember just walking up to my mum one day and telling her it hurt and there was little bumps under my skin (I was so oblivious! my last thought wasthat they were boobs. I thoughts I was sick or something).

She took a look and said that we needed to go shopping for my first bra. I was pretty excited about it but didn't want people to see us buying it or me wearing it.

I remember it was from Tesco I think, just a tiny little thing without padding or underwire.

A bralette would be perfect for her. I think that's what people are trying to tell you about with the half undershirts. They also can look like little triangle bras. They are cute and perfect for smaller chests. Here's what they look like

http://www.shopjustice.com/girls-clo...ck-bra/7990002

http://www.gap.com/browse/category.do?cid=6321
I was about ten or eleven when I started feeling alot of tenderness. I remember just walking up to my mum one day and telling her it hurt and there was little bumps under my skin (I was so oblivious! my last thought wasthat they were boobs. I thoughts I was sick or something).

She took a look and said that we needed to go shopping for my first bra. I was pretty excited about it but didn't want people to see us buying it or me wearing it.

I remember it was from Tesco I think, just a tiny little thing without padding or underwire.

A bralette would be perfect for her. I think that's what people are trying to tell you about with the half undershirts. They also can look like little triangle bras. They are cute and perfect for smaller chests. Here's what they look like

http://www.shopjustice.com/girls-clo...ck-bra/7990002

http://www.gap.com/browse/category.do?cid=6321
Originally Posted by TheSunshineState
Yep, this is what I started out with and I think they were great. I think I remember the elastic feeling weird, but it's much easier than jumping straight to an actual bra (which it doesn't sound like she needs yet anyway)

We just bought DD2's first bras. She'll be 11 next month, and is in 5th grade. I realized a couple weeks ago, just after school started, that it was time. We bought the three packs of the sports bra-like style. 2 white, 1 with a fun pattern. I was so relieved when she liked them and has worn them regularly. She'd always refused to wear the tanktops with the built-in bras. I made sure she knows that she shouldn't sleep in them.

I think we first bought similiar bras for DD1 the summer right after 4th grade and not yet 10. She didn't need it yet, but her good friend, who did need a bra had started, and I figured it wouldn't hurt. I don't think I ever told her not to sleep in the bras, and now she always does. Says it doesn't feel right without one. Sheesh. The only time I slept in a bra was when I was pregnant (whoa, nelly! turning over in bed was fun!) and nursing.
3a/2c
Trader Joe's Tingle conditioner wash/ conditioner
AG re:coil, LALooks gel, John Frieda Secret Weapon
I took DD to Target after school yesterday and after a little talking about it she decided she didn't want the regular undershirts. I figured she wouldn't because as I mentioned she has never been comfortable layering in the past. She picked out 2 like this and 2 similar but in a racerback (sports bra) style. She tried both styles on and said they were comfortable. She wore one last night (not to bed Rudee, don't worry ) and is in another today. I could see a difference but she seems to not be bothered by it. She was actually pretty willing to wear them and was telling me about her other friends who are wearing some similar ones. I was so worried but she's fine . I guess moms sometimes over worry.

I developed so quickly at her age that I went through so much. I was teased by all the boys and girls didn't really know how to react. I got my period at 10 and was using maxi pads in a time where girls were wearing stretch pants. I ALWAYS felt like everyone could tell no matter how many times my mom tried to reassure me. I was dealing with things my friends weren't and I felt so different. I have never wanted her to go through that. I guess some things are just out of our control and my job as a mom is to love and guide her.
High Priestess JessMess, follower of the Goddess of the Coiling Way and Confiscator of Concoctions in the Order of the Curly Crusaders

I guess I'm not sure why she would need a training bra as soon as she starts to develop. I didn't wear one right away. And I always wore undershirts as a little girl, so that wasn't an issue. Actually, I continued to wear them for some time after I had my first training bras- I developed young too and felt really self-conscious, especially on gym days, of being one of the only girls with a bra on.

My suggestion is to get her some undershirts- might as well be the regular, more comfortable kind for now. She'll probably be able to use them for a while yet.
Originally Posted by Gemini13
I agree, I always wore undershirts since I was little. Except I had the opposite problem in gym. I was the late bloomer and embarassed that everyone else had a bra except me. I got my first one in 8th grade(after I got my period). I think I developed late since I was underweight.
My mom got me undershirts at the end of grade 3. I had my first training bra in 4th grade.

I remember these days. What a stressful time. I got my period two months before I turned 10 (in 4th grade, over Christmas break).

You know what I would do (as extreme as it sounds)? Get her some undershirts, and then put her in every team sport she can manage to work off as much body fat as possible. Maybe this will buy her another year? LOL

I wish my parents would have put me in more team sports for physical exercise. I really think this would have stopped puberty from coming so soon for me. I played soccer, but by that time it was just playground stuff. Nothing hardcore. I really think strenuous exercise would have delayed things until maybe grade 6.
Originally Posted by curlyarca

Same here...got my period in 4th grade...AT SCHOOL (I'm still scared by this). I started wearing this half tshirt almost sports bras "bras" towards the end of 3rd grade beginning of 4th grade. By 6th grade, I was a C cup.

Get her whatever makes her feel most comfortable. I always wore undershirts as a kid because I'm always cold so I needed the extra layer.
Wanna talk products? Come Join us here!
http://www.facebook.com/PlatinumPJ

Extremely thick, kinky curls/coils that have a mind of thier own!!!!
_____________________________
I like my men and my hair....KINKY!!!!
_____________________________
Wanna save $10 off your next purchase at vitacost.com? Use my referal code (click the link)!



Created by MyFitnessPal.com - Free Calorie Counter

Trending Topics


Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On



All times are GMT -6. The time now is 06:22 PM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2014, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Copyright 2011 NaturallyCurly.com