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Last edited by shelbymustang; 12-22-2010 at 02:50 PM.
He has your number. If he was really interested, he would have called by now. Sorry.
I'd just send him a text, saying something like I hope his shows were going well, and see what happens next. He might be thinking the same thing you are, and someone has to get the ball rolling. Might as well be you, and it'll be in his court after that. And to get out of the texting rut, should it head that way quickly, you could always send one saying to give you a call sometime.

Or you could do the same thing, via a phone call, and leave a voicemail if he doesn't answer. Then you've let him know you're interested, and he can make the next move.
Under construction.
Go ahead and call him, but don't chase him. One call, then the ball is firmly in his court. See what he does with it.

Call, don't text. If you believe in courtship and don't want to be texting with him, then follow your own rule. Otherwise you're sending a mixed message.
I agree with RCW. If he really wanted to talk to you there would be no games. He'd just call you. I'd call him back only ONCE just to be like, "Duders, where'd you go???" If after two days he doesn't call me back I'd drop his @ss like a hot potato and move on. Don't want/need the head games or the drama.
I'm "TechKnockout" now.
I agree with RCW. If he really wanted to talk to you there would be no games. He'd just call you. I'd call him back only ONCE just to be like, "Duders, where'd you go???" If after two days he doesn't call me back I'd drop his @ss like a hot potato and move on. Don't want/need the head games or the drama.
Originally Posted by TK*
This totally cracked me up!

I also agree with the rest of the post.
OMG, LOOK!!

...It's a siggie.
Go ahead and call him, but don't chase him. One call, then the ball is firmly in his court. See what he does with it.

Call, don't text. If you believe in courtship and don't want to be texting with him, then follow your own rule. Otherwise you're sending a mixed message.
Originally Posted by wild~hair
ITA
Rather than love, than money, than fame, give me truth. I sat at a table where were rich food and wine in abundance, and obsequious attendance, but sincerity and truth were not;
and I went away hungry from the inhospitable board.
-Henry David Thoreau
Hi Girls,
I am not sure how old you all are but I am 46 and this is what I have learned,NEVER CALL A MAN, PERIOD. If he wants to see you or talk to you he will. There is never an exception ever ever ever. You want someone who is willing to walk through fire to ge to the georgousnes that is your beautiful smart funny self and then maybe you will go for a drink. You all may doubt me but if you do I suggest the following reading for you.
THE RULES
HE'S JUST NOT THAT INTO YOU
If you follow the advice in these books you will never end up with a jerk that forgets your birthday or puts you on his priority list after football and poker. His world will revolve around you, but not if you make excuses and rationalize bad behavior away.
I can hear you now, "it's different now than it was then" "I am a modern woman, I can call a man, she is crazy" "I'm not into game playing it's dishonest" enjoy the jerk you get while the rest of us rule followers get a guy who does out laundry and makes the bes and buys us flowers for no reason. Because if you raise your expectations a man will rise to meet them, IF HE IS INTO YOU, and if he is not...NEXT.
I promose you if he doesn't call, you shouldn't care, because he is a jerk deep down inside where you can't see it till six months from now and then you have a broken heart. Did I mention you shouldn't have sex for three months??? Oh, but I guess that's another discussion for weeding out the guys who have read the aformentioned books (lol) want more of this advice just ask. I have helped many a friend in my life to weed out loosers.
You rock don't settle for anything less than great!!
Cynthia
If you believe in courtship, then don't call him.

It's only been four days. If *I* were the one who was going to call someone I was interested in after meeting them, I wouldn't call them within the next 4 days.

I'd be THINKING about them constantly, and our initial meeting if we hit it off real well, but I wouldn't want to seem too eager, and I'd want to give them a chance to think about me a little. People are more interested in what they can't have, so don't make yourself so accessible.

Again, 4 days doesn't mean he isn't into you. Give it at least a week.
Hi Girls,
I am not sure how old you all are but I am 46 and this is what I have learned,NEVER CALL A MAN, PERIOD. If he wants to see you or talk to you he will. There is never an exception ever ever ever. You want someone who is willing to walk through fire to ge to the georgousnes that is your beautiful smart funny self and then maybe you will go for a drink. You all may doubt me but if you do I suggest the following reading for you.
THE RULES
HE'S JUST NOT THAT INTO YOU
If you follow the advice in these books you will never end up with a jerk that forgets your birthday or puts you on his priority list after football and poker. His world will revolve around you, but not if you make excuses and rationalize bad behavior away.
I can hear you now, "it's different now than it was then" "I am a modern woman, I can call a man, she is crazy" "I'm not into game playing it's dishonest" enjoy the jerk you get while the rest of us rule followers get a guy who does out laundry and makes the bes and buys us flowers for no reason. Because if you raise your expectations a man will rise to meet them, IF HE IS INTO YOU, and if he is not...NEXT.
I promose you if he doesn't call, you shouldn't care, because he is a jerk deep down inside where you can't see it till six months from now and then you have a broken heart. Did I mention you shouldn't have sex for three months??? Oh, but I guess that's another discussion for weeding out the guys who have read the aformentioned books (lol) want more of this advice just ask. I have helped many a friend in my life to weed out loosers.
You rock don't settle for anything less than great!!
Cynthia
Originally Posted by curlpro

As an adult, I would never wait 3 months of dating before having sex with a man. *I* would obviously want to have sex within that 3 month period of time.

The waiting game is just a to get the guy to stick it out for the long run. That's basically tricking a guy into a relationship. Why would you want to do that?

It's like Charlotte on SATC trying to find a man her whole life specifically to get married. Talk about setting women back another 50 or 60 years.
Go ahead and call him, but don't chase him. One call, then the ball is firmly in his court. See what he does with it.

Call, don't text. If you believe in courtship and don't want to be texting with him, then follow your own rule. Otherwise you're sending a mixed message.
Completely agree with this. Call *once* and see how it goes from there. If he asks you out- awesome. If not, onward and upward!
How did the conversation end? If he definitely said he would call you then don't call but if not then just put yourself out of your misery and call him but make sure you leave the conversation with a date- if not then don't bother calling him again.
I would say if you believe in courtship etc. etc. a guy in a touring band may not be the best date around. Sure he's probably fun but his weekends will be filled with his job. Plus guys in bands are meeting lot's of people on their travels. This guy may be totally different but i would say most guys in a band are like the above.

Last edited by wavy wonder; 09-20-2009 at 12:50 PM.
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Posts: 41,043
shelby...I just wanted to say love the new avatar!
ahhh! all i really hear from this is SLOW DOWN WOMEN! i mentioned this in another thread, i dont know how to beat around the bush. if i like a guy, im definitely not going to nag the hell out of him. but i will let him know that i am interested, or someone else will show him that they're interested and they're going to go after the other girl because they like him (not that you dont, but he's not a mind reader, and ur not showing him any signs). not all guys are chasers.

give him a call to just say hi. if he doesnt pick up, just leave a message- short and sweet. text messages dont always come thru, and missed calls dont pop up if hes in a place with no reception. now, its hard to not receive a voicemail. good luck.
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Last edited by shelbymustang; 12-22-2010 at 02:51 PM.
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Posts: 41,043
shelby...I just wanted to say love the new avatar!
Originally Posted by WileECoyote - Dissolving Bikini Wearer
Thanks! It's actually from the night that I met the boy in question. He's a super cutie and different than most other guys I've met. We were hanging before he left and we were talking about mexican food (he loves it!) and told him about this place here and said we'll have to go next time they're in town so he said something along the lines of well can i get your number then? I gave it to him and then he called me so I had his. I guess my thinking is that he called me so I had his instead of just getting mine but maybe that's just me hoping! They'll be a few hours away in december and then they'll be back in january for their first headlining tour and spending a week here. I'm not expecting to date the guy (at least not yet ) hah but he's so fun to talk with that i'd love to keep in touch (especially after our previous guys that are d-bags thread). So we'll see, I'll give him a few days and then maybe reevaluate?
Originally Posted by shelbymustang
Sure..I think you have the right attitude about it all, plus ya can't go wrong w/ Messican
I'm at the point now where I'm like, Look, you want me? Then show me. If I have to ask my GFs (real or virtual) what to do about him, that means he's leaving me hanging, confusing me. Bump that. I'm not chasing dudes anymore.
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shelby...I just wanted to say love the new avatar!
Originally Posted by WileECoyote - Dissolving Bikini Wearer
Thanks! It's actually from the night that I met the boy in question. He's a super cutie and different than most other guys I've met. We were hanging before he left and we were talking about mexican food (he loves it!) and told him about this place here and said we'll have to go next time they're in town so he said something along the lines of well can i get your number then? I gave it to him and then he called me so I had his. I guess my thinking is that he called me so I had his instead of just getting mine but maybe that's just me hoping! They'll be a few hours away in december and then they'll be back in january for their first headlining tour and spending a week here. I'm not expecting to date the guy (at least not yet ) hah but he's so fun to talk with that i'd love to keep in touch (especially after our previous guys that are d-bags thread). So we'll see, I'll give him a few days and then maybe reevaluate?
Originally Posted by shelbymustang


Sounds like he has no intention of calling you until next time he's in town. You can be one of his port-girls I guess.
Sounds like he has no intention of calling you until next time he's in town.
Originally Posted by RedCatWaves
That's what I was thinking. I wouldn't call him or expect much, just wait until he's in town again and see if he calls you.
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