Dating After 40...... - Page 2

ninja dog · 06-02-2008, 02:08 PM

I think you're right, DSG; why not have it on your terms? If you can get it, go for it!

rouquinne · 06-02-2008, 07:25 PM

i hate being single. but i've never had a relationship make it to the 2-year mark, so there's got to be something awfully wrong with me. it's the only explanation i can come up with...

g-stringranny · 06-02-2008, 07:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by rouquinne

i hate being single. but i've never had a relationship make it to the 2-year mark, so there's got to be something awfully wrong with me. it's the only explanation i can come up with...

I don't think there's anything wrong with you. I find I start losing interest around the 2 year mark. I don't feel I change so much as the men I am seeing do. It's like their true selves come out. I hate that I have to waste 2 years on Mr Wrong, because he is trying to act like Mr Right.

ninja dog · 06-02-2008, 08:05 PM

I do agree that things get duller, whether at two years or five. Supposedly this marks the transition from "romantic" love to "companionable" love.

I think it takes work to keep things interesting, and, well.....work is work. It's hard! I think we also expect more than previous generations of women, in mostly good ways, but perhaps some that are less good? I wonder sometimes how realistic modern expectations of love are, and I certainly include my own in that description.

Opinions?

g-stringranny · 06-02-2008, 08:42 PM

I haven't had the problem of the relationship getting past the sex to the comfort zone in 2 years. The problem I have had is with the man thinking at this point he can tell me what to do. If I want to spend time with my friends then he needs to be accepting of that. How I spend my money is my own business. If I wake up on a Sunday morning & want to drink a beer with my breakfast, then it's my business. If I want to spend a weekend without him, it doesn't mean I don't care about him. Bossy, clingy just doesn't appeal to me. At my age, sex is not on the top of my priority list, but my having my own identity is.

banjocurl · 06-26-2008, 11:52 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by g-stringranny

AI'd prefer someone who is already a grandfather or wanting to be one. I just don't want to date someone in his 70's.

i am married to a 72 yr old and there certainly are issues, but one nice thing is that i never feel insecure about getting older (i am 5

and i am his "trophy wife" (this is pretty funny since i am always in the woods and dress accordingly). we love each other very much and i am a "virgin grandmother" with 5 stepgrandkids. so i would not date just any 70 yr old but it all depends on the guy.

g-stringranny · 06-27-2008, 06:34 PM

I know a 73 yr old man who is being very persistant. If he had money I might go out with him.

I would feel too much that I was dating my Dad. My Mom is 76. I don't want to be a "trophy wife."

banjocurl · 06-27-2008, 08:09 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by g-stringranny

I know a 73 yr old man who is being very persistant. If he had money I might go out with him.

I would feel too much that I was dating my Dad. My Mom is 76. I don't want to be a "trophy wife."

well i hope you realize i am a bit tongue in cheek about the trophy wife thing. i love my husband and he loves me, we're married 16 yrs now. if a guy is being real persistent despite your clear signals to back off, this is trouble. sometimes women are indirect bc they do not want to be rude but this is a mistake. most men don't "get it" till you hit them over the head with a 2X4.

g-stringranny · 06-27-2008, 08:28 PM

I'm sorry if I came off as criticizing you. I feel I've been pretty direct with the older gentleman. I told him I wished my Mom lived out here, so they could go out. He said he wished he had never told me his age, like I couldn't tell.