Do you aim for pretty or prensentable...

They look mature and sophisticated and, to use SBB's word, striking.

That may be my next goal. Just gotta figure out the how part.....
Originally Posted by wavycurly40+
I would love to look sophisticated and striking. To be honest though, I'm happy being presentable. But for special occasions, I shoot for striking. Heck, I have never thought of myself as pretty.
Aw, my realization makes me sad.

I only go for presentable. I can't remember the last time I really put myself together to be pretty.

It was really fun in high school and college to pick out outfits, do makeup and hair. I'm not sure where that enthusiasm went.
I aim for "soft" in my clothes, hair, and makeup. Pretty is good, and pretty is always my goal, but trying too hard for pretty can look "hard" on someone my age.
I've never been pretty. Some people call me "cute."

So I go for presentable and, when I'm feeling it, stylish.
I've never been pretty. Some people call me "cute."

So I go for presentable and, when I'm feeling it, stylish.
Originally Posted by wild~hair
Uh, I've seen pictures of you, and I'm afraid I'm going to have to disagree.

I'm too lazy to go for pretty on most days. Presentable is a step up from my usual.
Minneapolis, MN
I've never been pretty. Some people call me "cute."

So I go for presentable and, when I'm feeling it, stylish.
Originally Posted by wild~hair
Uh, I've seen pictures of you, and I'm afraid I'm going to have to disagree.
Originally Posted by Poodlehead
Thanks PH!

I would say I've seen pictures of you as well, but you always have yourself shown from far away and only leave them up for about .2 seconds. But you look good from what I can see!
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ITA w/ poodle
Also TA w/ wild~hair
A friend and I were talking about this the other day. Just "maintenance" can seem overwhelming at our age. Plus hours of prep to look like you spent a mere 10 minutes getting ready. Not much payoff compared to when we were younger.

But what's the alternative? Giving up? Not yet!
shoulder-length 3a/b, depending on weather and products (or lack of products!)
So True Ala. How old are you if I may ask?
You may ask. I'm 47. ... I have to say I rarely spend hours getting myself all dolled up. An event has to be a Big Fat Deal for that. Fortunately, I can be reasonably presentable in a much shorter time.

But all the maintenance stuff I didn't have to do before is a real pain: hair color, extra skin care, etc. ... And clothes! Why does it seem like everything is for teenagers, "red hat" ladies, or strippers?
shoulder-length 3a/b, depending on weather and products (or lack of products!)
And clothes! Why does it seem like everything is for teenagers, "red hat" ladies, or strippers?
Originally Posted by alacurl

I agree tremendously with this question. Why does it seem so hard to find clothes that don't make me look like I've been shopping in my teenage neighbor's closet? I don't want to look like my mother and I don't want to look like a 16 year old (or even a 20 year old for that matter). I just want to look like a nicely dressed 30/40 something. I am 40, but I can dream can't I?

I've really been struggling with this issue over the last year or so. My sisters are both considerably younger than I am. I can wear some of what they do. Business attire seems to be easier, but casual clothes and dressing up a bit to go out with my husband is a challenge. I feel like a frump most of the time, but also occasionally over dressed. That's not at all how I want to present myself to ME, my husband or the rest of the world.

Where do you shop for stylish clothes for someone who is not 20 any longer?
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The last year or two, I've been shopping almost exclusively at softsurroundings.com. They have beautiful casual clothing...not to young, not too old. Great sales at their outlet site too.
Where do you shop for stylish clothes for someone who is not 20 any longer?
Originally Posted by brdudeon
Ann Taylor and Ann Taylor Loft have some absolutely dirt cheap stuff once it hits their sales racks. You might not be able to get every thing you'd ideally like, but there's a lot to still pick from once they go on clearance.
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I've been focusing more on looking stylish, but appropriate for my age. I've been blessed with a daughter who has an excellent eye when it comes to fashion & I won't shop without her.

I still want to look pretty & sexy, but I feel at my age this comes out more with the way I hold myself & my confidence.
From Michael Berg:

Every person has a unique connection to the Creator that can never be extinguished, and every person has a great soul that can manifest important things in our world. To make a person feel less than they are because of something inside themselves, be it faith, race, or sexual orientation, is the greatest sin of all."
I go for "not bad." I'd love to be pretty, but I'm just "not bad." I have to say I got paid a nice compliment yesterday though. At the school where I work, we all have to wear badges with picture, name, position. When the kindergarten class I was expecting came in, the teacher, who is a friend of mine, said, "is that your badge?" and I said yes. She said, "that doesn't look like you at all. You're much prettier than that, and you look much younger than you do in that picture." I laughed so hard and gave her a big hug. I said, "you've just made my day. You know, I've never given much thought to this picture, but the next time the picture-taker guy comes in, I'm going to tell him I need to get my picture redone because <insert teacher's name here> says I look much better in real life than I do on this badge." I think I walked with a little spring in my step for the rest of the day.
The smallest deed is greater than the grandest intention.

I am the master of my fate: I am the captain of my soul. (Invictus - William Ernest Henley)

Just think I used to worry 'bout things like that,
Used to worry 'bout rich and skinny, 'til I wound up poor and fat,
Nowadays I kind of worry where my mind's been at,
Just think I used to worry 'bout things like that. (Delbert McClinton - I Used to Worry from Never Been Rocked Enough)
Presentable for me, pretty's never going to happen. At least I no longer worry about not being pretty cos I think I can do presentable quite well!
3b in South Australia.
Presentable for me, pretty's never going to happen. At least I no longer worry about not being pretty cos I think I can do presentable quite well!
Originally Posted by Starmie
Exactly!

I go for the "have on makeup but look like I don't" look. I've never been one for heavy makeup, which doesn't look good on anyone my age (IMHO) anyway.

I do color my hair because I am not yet ready to be mistaken for a 60-something.
... And clothes! Why does it seem like everything is for teenagers, "red hat" ladies, or strippers?
Originally Posted by alacurl
I'm late to this, and you're probably gone, but I must tell you I LOVE this observation! The "red hat lady" part depresses me more than the stripper part. It's like, HELLO, ok, I'm over 40, but that doesn't mean I want to wear a mumu and look like a big shapeless box! Working hard to maintain the figure, ok? Give me some clothes that aren't tents!!!!

ok, rant over. And no disrespect to the Red Hat Ladies. And of course, as we get older, we might want things a little looser. But some of these retailers geared toward "mature" women assume that we all have the same body type. In reality, slightly fitted clothes are often more flattering than the "Maude" outfits.

And yes, I second Ann Taylor.

Last edited by wavycurly40+; 02-24-2009 at 07:26 AM.
I aim for stylish. I do not consider myself (nor have I ever) pretty. I like to feel put together and when I do I feel more confident which I am sure makes me look better.
Central Massachusetts

One good reason to only maintain a small circle of friends is that three out of four murders are committed by people who know the victim. ~George Carlin~

In regards to Vagazzling: They just want to get into the goods without worrying about getting scratched up by fake crystals. ~spring1onu~
For me it depends on the day and my mood. Most days I'm aiming for presentable but on occassion I still am for the pretty.
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