Maybe a bit morbid but a good parenting topic I think still...

I don't think it's morbid. I even knew who I would go live with when I was younger if something happened to my parents. It was comforting because I liked them and could see myself there if it was necessary.

I wouldn't rule out some people just because they don't have kids. I'm single and don't have children. My step-sister (we're a close family) was talking about this one day because she wasn't sure what she wanted to do. I looked at her and told her that if anything ever happened to her and her husband I would not hesitate at all to take in her children. I don't think she'd ever thought of it and sure there are other options but she appreciated my letting her know that.
I wouldn't rule out some people just because they don't have kids. I'm single and don't have children. My step-sister (we're a close family) was talking about this one day because she wasn't sure what she wanted to do. I looked at her and told her that if anything ever happened to her and her husband I would not hesitate at all to take in her children. I don't think she'd ever thought of it and sure there are other options but she appreciated my letting her know that.
Originally Posted by KookyCurl
Ditto this!

My sisters already asked if I would take the baby if something happened to her and hubby.

Our parents are in their 50's and quite enjoying life. They would take him in a heartbeat, but thats not really fair at this stage in their lives. Her bio mom is nuts, and our brother isn't at a place where a kid would fit!
I believe in manicures. I believe in overdressing. I believe in primping at leisure and wearing lipstick. I believe in pink. I believe that laughing is the best calorie burner. I believe in kissing, kissing a lot. I believe in being strong when everything seems to be going wrong. I believe that happy girls are the prettiest girls. I believe that tomorrow is another day and I believe in miracles.
Audrey Hepburn
Kaia, my husband and I have separate life insurance policies, in addition to what he has through work. Originally his policy was for more than mine (since he's the breadwinner) but we changed it so they're equal or almost equal - we figured if I were to die, we'd want him to have the financial assets to be able to stay home with the kid(s).
Faith, 3Aish redhead
Mama to two wild superheroes and a curly-headed baby boy
This really freaks me out, my mom is too old I think to handle the boys and I barely know SO's parents. The only person that I would trust with my kids has five boys of her own..... we really need to discuss this

Kaia, my husband and I have separate life insurance policies, in addition to what he has through work. Originally his policy was for more than mine (since he's the breadwinner) but we changed it so they're equal or almost equal - we figured if I were to die, we'd want him to have the financial assets to be able to stay home with the kid(s).
Originally Posted by PixieCurl
Mine is less that DH's, but even though my salary isn't terribly important on a day-to-day basis, we bought enough insurance for me to pay off our mortgage.

Life insurance for younger women is really really cheap. I think I pay $120/year for over $250,000 in coverage.


Life insurance for younger women is really really cheap. I think I pay $120/year for over $250,000 in coverage.
Originally Posted by mad scientist
Wow that is cheap! I don't remember my rate but it's definitely more than that, but I also think I've got $500K in coverage. Our goal is that if either of us dies, the other can pay off the mortgage and then - if the rest is invested properly - continue to stay home with the kid(s) to live off the rest. But yeah, the younger you are when you get life insurance the lower the rate that you can lock in, and women's rates are better than men's.
Faith, 3Aish redhead
Mama to two wild superheroes and a curly-headed baby boy
we are going to set ous up a little differently then most people would...

DH and I both on a basic life-time policy
DH and I both having a term policy...
DH's would cover the amount of the house and all other expenses plus living expenses for 10 years
Mine would cover bills for one year, PLUS enough to hire a full time nanny
I have written in my will that SO gets custody of my kids if something happens to me. If something happens to both of us my best friends get them. Knowing the aftermath of a parent in the family dying (my husband, their dad, died 5 years ago) it's so important to have these conversations. I feel that people who ignore this aspect of life are being silly. If it weren't for DH's life insurance we wouldn't have survived. EVERYONE needs life insurance if at all possible and EVERYONE needs to specify who their children would go to. If I didn't specify my MIL would no doubt fight for them and win being younger and more financially stable than either one of my parents. I would HATE for them to be raised by her and her husband. I pay around $40 a month for my $250,000 policy and kids policies at $10,000 each. Small price to pay considering anything could happen.
High Priestess JessMess, follower of the Goddess of the Coiling Way and Confiscator of Concoctions in the Order of the Curly Crusaders

If I didn't specify my MIL would no doubt fight for them and win being younger and more financially stable than either one of my parents. I would HATE for them to be raised by her and her husband.
Originally Posted by Jess the Mess

I wonder if just stating in a will that the children are to stay with your husband would be enough to stand up in court if your former MIL decided to fight for them. A court might decide she has closer blood ties than a step father. You might want to consider having your husband adopt them or maybe just give him legal guardianship. There might be a way to give him more rights without invalidating their survivor benefits from their father.

We had similar issues with my 2 older sons. They have reached legal age now (just about, #1 is of age and #2 is 17.5), but my husband, who has been their real and only father figure for 15 years, would have had no legal rights to them if something had happened to me. He couldn't adopt them because we would have lost child support (and because my ex's wouldn't give up their parental rights), so I gave him legal limited guardianship. It may or may not have stood up in court if the ex's had suddenly had a wave of paternal feelings and decided to try to take them from my husband, but it was the best I could do under the circumstances. Luckily, I have lived long enough for them to reach adulthood so the point was moot.
Wow this thread freaks me out my SO and I have never even talked about this , their is no one that I trust enough to raise my kids.
Originally Posted by Delma
If you don't decide, a stranger will if god forbid something should happen.

For me, my brother and SIL would have DS if something happened. If by some weird twist of fate, something were to happen to me and my brother (and SIL), my best friend would have DS. MY gosh, that would mean she would have 3 kids, each 16 months apart.
Long, blonde, 3a/mostly b hair.

If I didn't specify my MIL would no doubt fight for them and win being younger and more financially stable than either one of my parents. I would HATE for them to be raised by her and her husband.
Originally Posted by Jess the Mess

I wonder if just stating in a will that the children are to stay with your husband would be enough to stand up in court if your former MIL decided to fight for them. A court might decide she has closer blood ties than a step father. You might want to consider having your husband adopt them or maybe just give him legal guardianship. There might be a way to give him more rights without invalidating their survivor benefits from their father.

We had similar issues with my 2 older sons. They have reached legal age now (just about, #1 is of age and #2 is 17.5), but my husband, who has been their real and only father figure for 15 years, would have had no legal rights to them if something had happened to me. He couldn't adopt them because we would have lost child support (and because my ex's wouldn't give up their parental rights), so I gave him legal limited guardianship. It may or may not have stood up in court if the ex's had suddenly had a wave of paternal feelings and decided to try to take them from my husband, but it was the best I could do under the circumstances. Luckily, I have lived long enough for them to reach adulthood so the point was moot.
Originally Posted by RedCatWaves
TY for this info. I'll def look in to it with my lawyer.
High Priestess JessMess, follower of the Goddess of the Coiling Way and Confiscator of Concoctions in the Order of the Curly Crusaders

Trending Topics


Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On



All times are GMT -6. The time now is 10:14 PM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2014, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Copyright 2011 NaturallyCurly.com