Why should you feel guilty? It's not like you owe anybody or even your hair anything. There's no one right way to take of your hair, as this site obviously illustrates. If something doesn't work for you then it doesn't. However, if you want tips on how to make CG work for you could always modify it like so many other people do. Use a sulfate cleanser once in a while. Don't straight up co-wash all the time. Also, you can still be CG and use a conditioning cleanser or low poo that contains no sulfates but still has other maybe gentler surfactants that cleanse the hair. I think co-washing's success is highly dependent on what you're using to cleanse the scalp as well as your hair's properties. Also on what kind of scalp you have.
If you had an oily scalp before it reportedly can take a few weeks or even over a month to adjust because your scalp was overproducing sebum for so long (maybe because you were dehydrating it with sulfates?) and it needs to realize it doesn't have to do that anymore. If your scalp was dry, it can either freak out or adjust faster and get relieved. If you're normal, well, I adjusted fairly quickly once I figured out what co-wash to use and a system that worked for me. (Co-wash, co-wash, low-poo once a week, but I have dry hair.) Porosity is important too I think in terms of whether or not you get buildup. I rarely do but then I'm highly porous. Also curl type matters. The reason why the 4s tend to have the driest and most delicate kind of hair is because the curls and z's are so tight it's difficult for whatever oil they produce run down the hair and get to the ends. That's why straight up co-washing can work so well for them and many of the 3's. The reason why so many wavies and 2A-3As need to low poo once in a while is the curls are looser and sebum will run down the shaft more easily if their scalps are producing enough sebum. There's no right or wrong here. It's just mix and match. I think you could still have your sulfates and your silicones too if you don't want to give them up, but maybe you use less of each and play around.
You can also plop your hair with either a microfiber or flour sack towel as well as a long-sleeved cotton t-shirt once you get out of the shower. I always do the scrunch squeeze thing with an MF towel after I put on my leave in (usually in the shower) to stop it from dripping all over the place. The CG method is not "no towel", it's just find a fabric that has a smooth surface to dry your hair with so that there's no frizz. My hair is not a big thing anymore. It takes me ten minutes to style it versus the 45 minutes it used to take me when I wore it straight before CG. It also takes me five minutes in the morning to refresh. If anything the biggest deal for me now is I still like to play with it and have gotten a little product junkie, but I'm thinking it's a phase that will pass. For me CG works very well because my hair was quite prone to frizz and ill defined (loose curl type) before I tried it. I was already sulfate free and using Wen for five years before CG but I guess the silicones were just smothering my hair shaft and making my hair extra thirsty.
As for Massey comment, well, after reading a Devachan review I'm highly skeptical of the way she runs her business but I do think the comment about her hair is a little left field. She probably has a completely different curl type and set of properties than you. Tighter curls tend to battle more frizz up top. Also suppose Massey were to take a look at your hair and say she doesn't like yours for whatever reason? That said, I did buy one of the deva gels and even though it gives me good first day hair, it severely dries my hair out and does make my hair look quite stringy or perhaps "dirty" and lifeless by the end of the second day. But everybody's hair will react differently to whatever product. As ever with curly hair, it's so highly variable and the "CG method" is just a set of loose guidelines. Everything else we need to fill in the gaps ourselves.