Majoring in Curls
Email your questions to Aimee.

The other day I was watching “Beaches,” one of my favorite movies. It’s the the one with Better Milder. (Who, by the way, has gorgeous curly hair in the film despite the fact that it is a wig”>. There’s a song she sings a few times in the film, and some of the lyrics struck me.

“You gotta give a little, take a little, and let your poor heart break a little. That’s the story of, that’s the glory of love.”

These are indeed wise words that definitely apply to romantic relationships, platonic relationships and pretty much any relationship. But that song got me thinking about the relationship between people and their hair. It might sound cheesy or trite, but the song really echoes how we need to live with our hair!

Every person — whether they’re a curly or not — knows what a bad hair day is. There are those mornings when you seriously contemplate shaving your head just to spare yourself from the agony of looking in the mirror. Then there are days when all you want to do is look in the mirror! Every curl is a perfect, shiny ringlet, and you incessantly toss your hair like a model in a Pantene commercial. (Don’t judge me; I know you do it too . . .”>

But the truth of the matter is that most days are a combination of the good, the bad, and the ugly. Your coif looks perfect in the morning, but by the time midafternoon rolls around, you’ve developed a halo of frizz. No one’s hair looks perfect 24/7. Even celebrities don’t have miracle hair. What they do have is a team of stylists and photograph touch-ups 24/7. It’s just an illusion, I promise.

What we as curlies need to realize and accept is that our relationship with our hair is just like any other relationship in our life. Just like your relationship with a boyfriend, girlfriend, etc., there needs to be give and take and acceptance of the good and the bad. One shouldn’t control the other in either situation — that just ends up bad for every party involved. For example, those girls who try to control their hair by straightening and frying it every day end up with severely damaged hair. And those who don’t pay any attention whatsoever to their locks, also run the risk of damage. If you take care of your hair, it will treat you well. Maybe you won’t have a Nicole Kidman day every day, but those days will start happening more and more often.

I know that as young adults and teenagers in college, it’s so important to have the right image and to want to look good all the time. Looking good makes people notice you and makes you feel better about yourself. Whenever I have good hair, I feel like that day will be all sunshine and smiles.

But when the bad days come and all I want is a ponytail and a hat, I tend to dwell on the downside.

If you can learn to accept the iffy days and still feel confident, you will gain something amazing. Don’t let your confidence be controlled by your hair. Work with it.

When it comes to your curls, you’ve got to give a little, take a little, and let your poor heart break a little. That’s the story of, that’s the glory of love. And curls.

Cozy Friedman

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