What's the deal with white men and natural hair?


Natural hair has garnered fascination across genders and nationalities, but there always seems to be a special connection between women with natural hair and men. When it comes to crossing racial lines, white men and women who choose to wear their hair natural are usually a hot topic of conversation. Inquiring minds want to know — what's the deal with white men and natural hair?

In the Media

Throughout movies and social media, there have been more than a few examples of the curiosity between white men and natural hair. You can go back to a movie like “Something New,” where Sanaa Lathan’s character “cut” her relaxed hair in favor of a curly, “natural” look. This change was well received by Simon Baker’s character, her eventual love interest who just so happened to be white.

Maybe even more popular is the highly acclaimed web series “The Misadventures of Awkward Black Girl.” The series focuses on “J,” an awkward black girl who happens to rock a seriously awesome TWA, and her budding relationship with “White J,” an equally awkward white guy who finds her beautiful.

These are just a few examples that stick out among the many. As the natural hair community continues to increase, so does the attention it receives from men of other races.

What's the Attraction?

It takes a certain amount of confidence to rock the natural look, and I think that is the primary allure. Every guy has his own preference, whether looser waves or tight curls, braids or fades, but it’s all in how you carry yourself. Your inner beauty can be exuded through your hair, and no matter the race, it may be undeniable to the opposite sex.

For some white men, natural hair seems to take a lot of the fuss away from primping and maintenance, and allows the focus to be more on you. I think some men in general see women with natural hair as being less superficial and more genuine. From reader comments and personal experience, compliments received from white men usually express the appeal of our natural beauty. Being able to be yourself without some of the limitations of relaxed hair is simply refreshing.

Genuine Connection

In the natural hair community, there are many interracial couples represented. The multitude of white husbands and their natural wives are truly an expression of love and acceptance. CurlTalk forum member HennaRo said her white fiancé “loves (her) hair…his fluffy pillow.”

Another CurlTaker, HJ Lutz, wrote of her experience being married to a white guy for over a decade: “He understands me completely.”

It may not seem as obvious on the surface, but it's easy to see how genuine connections can be made when someone appreciates you for you and not your hair.

Men and Natural Hair

The male species generally falls into three categories with regards to natural hair, no matter their race. Some will not like it, and there's nothing you can do to change their minds. Others will absolutely love it, and will go head over heels when you release your curls! However, I think the majority of men will fall into a third, broad and indifferent group – as long as you’re happy with your hair, they couldn’t be more pleased.

Want More?

Get in on the CurlTalk convo: White men love natural hair!

Final Thoughts

In my experience, men of many races can be attracted to naturally curly and kinky hair, but it is simply a reflection of the person under the hair. When you display confidence in yourself, you never know who may be picking up on it. I’ve accepted quite a few compliments from white men when my hair was curly, in braids, and even when it was straight.

Although I think it depends on the guy, many naturals who have been the recipients of compliments feel that white men may just be more liberal towards the styles they find attractive. It’s easy to appreciate a hair compliment, but it’s mighty special when it comes from the opposite sex, no matter the race.

Lisa Michelle

My fiance and I have been together for about 6 months and I've known him for nearly a year. I went natural shortly after we met. Full on big chop nearly bald! And he told me that's when he fell in love with me. He loves my natural hair. The other day I told him I might straighten it for an employee party and he didn't want me too because he didn't want it to damage my hair.

my man first noticed me cause of my hair, he thinks these same sort of sexy flirty wild.... fun part of me, that wouldnt be there if i wasnt curly :)

When I started wearing my natural hair, most of the negativity came from my own people. My biggest supporter was my boyfriend, who happens to be white. He says he actually prefers my hair this way!

Aawe, your bf seems like a nice guy :) (@Ms_Punkette10) Guys keep wanting to get their hands into my hair (I find it annoying because like when it comes to my hair, I'm a clean freak. Like, I don't want dirty hands in my hair so like I want people to wash their hands before it touches my hair). I have heard guys complement my hair and like it makes me feel special sometime, but I haven't met a guy I like and like I'm not really looking for one now, so yeah, but some guys like natural hair and that's really nice because like there are many natural haters in this world. My dad loves my mum's natural hair, but she hates it (so, she gets some creamy crack (relaxer) on her hair about every 6 weeks), my dad doesn't like that, but like he can't force her to stop that. However, the day he heard I was going natural, he was happy, bur well, my dad thinks that, well, my natural hair is like mum's, he thinks the curls I have (way tighter than mum's) mean that my hair's not been combed in weeks and so on... *sigh* But anyways! there are many guys who truly like naturally curly hair! :)

My bf (who is asian) always told me that he loves me no matter what but because of past exes who discourage me wearing my hair naturally, I didnt want to wear it. However, last year I finally let that negativity go and go natural. The first time my bf saw me, he said that he was glad to see me finally...that really hit my heart and I've been natural ever since. Despite the maintenance I put into my hair, he loves me and my hair. So I feel lucky to have someone who supports me in my hair journey.

I think it may be as simple as white men may not have any hang-ups about hair like some black men may have. Some black men are just as affected by beauty standards as some black women. White men may have the attitude that hair is just hair and if it looks good it looks good whether straight, curly, wavy, kinky or somewhere in between. I don't know...my two cents. http://cutekinks.blogspot.com

OMG! And I thought I was the only one that watched the Awkward Black Girl series! I really hate Nina, btw. And I hope there's a second series!