The last date I went on, the guy started telling me about how in his past life he fought in the war as a German colonel. I said WWI? He says, no WWII.

So, let me get this straight. In your past life, you were a Nazi and some how you thought this was appropriate first (last) date conversation.

This is EXACTLY why I don't date.
Democracy is not a spectator sport.

You know why pandas are endangered? Cause pandas ain't got no game.

Jesus loves you, but I'm his favorite.