I don't know what region you are in but I was raised in the south. I also went to all-white private schools with wealthy people my whole life and I do not think that affected my view of beauty. So, I don't think you can blame your perception of beauty based on the environment you were brought up in. In fact, I never wished I looked like my counterparts, and it was never an issue that my skin color was brown. I had tons of friends of all races and even dated outside of my race.

Your perception of beauty should come from within, however, that's easier said than done. At this point, I think hair is the least of your concern. It seems like you have deeper psychological issues than hair. You can permanently straighten your hair as another person has mentioned, but this doesn't seem like a reasonable solution to your REAL problem. I mean chemically straightening your hair is mini-issue as opposed to the bigger issue, which is your self-esteem. I don't know how to tell you to work on this, but I think it's really important that you resolve this inner issue.
Updated April 6, 2010

CG Method

Type: 3b
Porous, normal elasticity, and coarse texture

Cowash: CJ Daily Fix
Styling: CJ, jojoba oil, KCCC
DT: CJ Curl Rehab, CR Algae Deep conditioner