OMG, thank you guys for the advice. I was really getting depressed about it.
So, I decided to work on all my complaints one at a time, lol.

For the dryness and over 'kinky-ness', I decided maybe I needed a better conditioner for my cowashes, one without protein, and less cones. I picked Herbal Essence Hello Hydration. I know it has Dimethicone, but I've heard great things about it, so I tried it. And MAN, I was almost in tears in the shower. My hair has never ever felt so soft and satisfied, like it was thirsty for so long...ugh. I'm sold.

For the carpety-ness and lack of curls, I decided to try IC Fantasia (no BSS near me sells Ecostyler, seriously??) And it works ok, I feel I could do better, but it's better than where I was I dont have to use a comb now but I'll try the Ecostyler.

Thats where I am for now, thanks again guys....

(Of course that doesnt mean I wont be back with more questions....I will. )

In my arsenal: HE Hello Hydration, IC fantasia, Africa's best Herbal Oils
Dying to try: KC Knot Today, KCCC, Ecostyler