I don't think she is doomed. She just needs to stand up and say "Hey, mom I'm not inviting you because you make any family/friend event your stage and you don't care to have your event ruined. Mom needs a reality check and she needs to grow up. She then will have the option of coming and being an adult or staying home. It should be her option. If she shows up and starts her crap, show her the door. You warned her beforehand. Like I said before, stop enabling this woman.
Originally Posted by Lotsawaves
Okay, I think this is pretty harsh. This is her MOTHER. She is an adult, she just has her own topics that she finds interesting, or might spark conversation. Kick her mom out from Thanksgiving dinner, seriously? You'd be okay with one of your kids doing this to you?

I think warning others (if they've been there before, they know how mom is), is a good idea. Or, even before people get there, ask mom to try and keep conversation light and upbeat, as she (the OP) remembers how hurt she was last year, the hurt can be avoided etc.

I think short of causing family drama by just not inviting her, there are things that can be done. However, if mom has pretty much always been like this, even not inviting her won't make her change and just cause more hurt.
Originally Posted by M2LR
Yea, what I said was pretty harsh. I just get tired of one person messing it up for others. They control the whole situation which shouldn't be the case, even if they are family. I know it's her mom. Of course, that should be taken into consideration, but it sounds to me that her mom doesn't take anyone else into consideration.

Springcurl, I'm happy that your Thanksgiving went good.
From Michael Berg:

Every person has a unique connection to the Creator that can never be extinguished, and every person has a great soul that can manifest important things in our world. To make a person feel less than they are because of something inside themselves, be it faith, race, or sexual orientation, is the greatest sin of all."