I had that second interview on Monday and got my rejection yesterday

I had such a good feeling. I wasn't in there long, but I met with about six people at once and they told me that my first round was longer than anybody else's and that they had a very complete summary of me.

They raved about how great my references were.

And then I got the rejection.

I keep thinking I'm okay and doing better and then I get another rejection and I just feel like the biggest loser and failure in the world.

My mom has been supportive and sympathetic, at LEAST...I told her how hurt I felt on Thanksgiving because my aunt and one of my cousins truly treat me like I'm the Black Sheep Loser of the family. My mom agreed with me that they really are pretty awful to me because I don't have the things in their value system (husband, kids, money.) My cousin had one job in her entire life, which her mom got her, and didn't live on her own until she had a man to move in with...but apparently that makes her much more successful than I am. They also grill me about how much I get paid for stuff I write when it's produced, and don't understand why I do it if I'm not getting a lot of money for it. They just don't get it.

(Background info...this is the aunt who made the collage of everyone's wedding photos and cut me out of every single group shot because I was the only girl not married....................................)

I'm going to those "Positive Thinking" classes and trying to go to meetup groups to try to meet new people just to get out.

And Facebook is the absolute Devil. Every day, I'm hearing about somebody buying a house or getting a promotion or getting married or being pregnant.

I just want something good to happen. It doesn't even have to be a job. It just has to be something.