First off, your baby girl has beautiful, thick hair. I agree with the other poster, try to stay away from products with petroleum and/ or alcohol. Take a look at beads, braids, and beyond. She has great styling advice. I also agree that twisting her hair and leaving it for a week may be a good way to go, especially in the winter. You can leave it down, put it in a ponytail, two pigtails or a bun, all while it's in the twists.

Beyond detangling and washing in sections, I would also suggest detangling prior to washing. This makes detangling, washing, ect easier, plus you remove most the dirt while detangling.

As for shampoo, you might try deva curl no poo. I find it less stripping than the average shampoo. Also, try going 1-2 weeks between washing to keep moisture in her hair. I really like the Shea moisture line for conditioners, ect.
Me: 3c, very thick
BC- May 2010
Current routine:
pre poo: avacado, banana babyfood, grapeseed oil, and silk amino acid. Cleanser: DC No Poo 1x a week and BC 1x a week. DT: GVP Cond balm and grape seed oil
Co-wash: GVP CD, TJ tea tree
Leave-in: GVP CD, TJ tea tree, and grape seed oil
Styling: HETT and castor oil
DD (8 & 6 yo): both4s (1 thick, 2 thin) keep in 2strand twists
DD (4yo): 3b (very thin, hard to grow) keep in single braids with lots of beads for protection