It is hard for me to have conversations with these men!

Seriously, where are the men who can hold an intense, intellectual conversation? Someone who can make geeky jokes one minute, quote Shakespeare, and then talk dirty to me the next.

I'm going to be alone for the rest of my life.
I ain't thirsty. There's plenty of fish in the sea, but I don't want all of them, can I have some standards? Or do we just have to settle, for someone's who meh and will do.