Biolage cream conditioning balm (felt weird and made hair icky. Certainly did not condition. And zero slip.)

Biolage Gellee gel. Did zippy nada - I didn't even feel like I had put anything at all in to style my hair.

L'Oreal Evercreme. oooooo the smell! ;p [gag] (gave it to straight haired niece who loved it).

L'Oreal Eversleek. Like washing your hair with reeking perfume and sunflower oil ;p limp, icky, stinky hair.

Desert Essences Coconut anything. Smells rancid and destroyed my hair. (detested the skin lotion, too).

Nexxus Humectress Therappe - pineapple overload, and made my hair into gummy straw. My straight-haired neighbor loves it, though.

Ion anything - reeks and destroys hair.

Obviously I have an issue with perfumes ;p
Finer, mixed with coarser strands, low-porosity, wavy curly whirly hair...3A, 2C hair. Medium thickness, medium elasticity.
S-shaped hair with corkscrew ends. My hair is even more confused than me ;p
My hair officially hates protein Once a month is enough!
Currently a fan of TiGi products, (rock on, TiGi Curlesque styling creme!) but that will soon change - I am a self-avowed product junkie! Yay!
BIG fan of supersoaker method - thanks Rudeechick!