I have similar hair, it sounds like. I've been using something called Three Sisters Curling Gelo (got it at a grocery store called Krogers--not sure where u are!) and Devacurl AnGel. The three sisters isn't too expensive.

When I get out of the shower I scrunch just a little with a t shirt so my hair is still very wet. I flip over & apply the three sisters carefully from root to end, then put some Angel in my hand, rub together & scrunch into the ends. I shake it out and use the t shirt to scrunch more of the wet out.

I end up with light hold, no crunchy! The Devacurl is expensive, but at least this way I'm not using as much as I would otherwise.

Good luck!!