I color my grays using Colorsilk (yep, the super cheap drugstore stuff), and I haven't had any problems with using my own CG conditioner. I just toss out the condish that comes with the dye, and use either my Yes to Carrots or Aubrey Honeysuckle Rose, leaving it on for a few minutes. Then rinse & my normal routine. Maybe you could try a different brand of color?
Medium/coarse, low porosity, dense, mix of 3s
CG (again) since Nov. 2012

Cleanse: SM Moisture Retention, Elucence MBC, KC Come Clean
Condish: Giovanni DL, Cure Care, Ion Treatment, GVP Balm, AOHR
Stylers: KCCC, SM Souffle, AOMM, SS CEJ, JCRR, JCCC

Trying out steaming!