I would think that the best idea is to try CG? Maybe if that doesn't work out for you, you could also try low pooing once in awhile. The best way to start would be to look at people's signatures (people who look like they have hair similiar to yours) and go from there. Honestly, there is no "cure all" that I can tell you because what works for my hair may not work for yours. Everyone's hair is different and unfotunately we have to go through trial and error.
When you said that your hair looked good and got worse and worse, that sounds like silicones making your hair appear healthier and covering up the damage. Silicones can be quite evil, but some people still use them in moderation.
But all I can say is experiment. You see if you look at your natural hair with out all the product you add maybe that will help you determine a more accurate analysis of how healthy your hair really is. Sometimes I like to wash my hair and apply no product whatsoever just to see how my hair is doing and what it just does naturally. If it feels dry or anything I may want to incorporate more moisturizing/emollient based products to soften and nourish my hair etc. I hope all this makes sense. Best of look to you and don't give up.
*Current Routine*
CO/CW: CJ Daily Fix, GR Restorative, SM RSB, SM SFC
DC: SM, CJ Rehab, G.Nutrafix, DIY
Sealers: an oil, JC N&S
Stylers: just CO, CJ CIAB, KCCC, aloe gel, FSG
Once in a while: ACV, Lemon-Aid

Oils to seal, rinse, and/or pre-poo as needed

2c/3a/3b coarse, normal porosity
CG since 2007