My fiancée Steven is very similar, he hates doing too much to his hair but also hates when it gets itchy because of build up/dandruff/dirt etc. I found that if I can get him to Cowash every few days with suave coconut and really scrub his scalp and detangle thats the only thing he really needs to do, just rinse that out and maybe put a little back in as a leave in. If I get really lucky I can get him to do a rinse out conditioner but since his hair is mid length and has a pretty strong curl pattern he doesn't need to have styling products to speak of. HTH
~Curly, Runner, Self-confessed Nerd~

2a no product/2b-c styled
Low Porosity, Fine
No poo-SM
Co wash-VO5 kiwi lime*
Rinse out- ION EC
Leave in - Giovanni Direct then SM smoothie (ends only)
Stylers-SM souffle topped with BRHG*

Hair hates: glycerin (high dews here in TX)
Hair likes: Coconut Oil*, protein