well here it goes, my rant/manifesto/vent on hair boards (this could take a while, so bear with me):
being a woman of color, no matter what, hair is never just hair. because of american history, thats just the way it is. so when you have different hair boards catering to non straight hair, there are always underlying issues and feelings that women of color have. like on the site in question, at first i thought the filter was ridiculous. but i can totally understand why they are in place. im not one who is fond of being censored so if i want to say relaxer, i type reelaxer or flat.iron or 3 cee...you get the point. but obviously those filters need to be in place because like clockwork, in comes a new member talking about, "i hate my natural hair and where can i find a relaxer?" or "does miss jessies really work?" thats simply not tolerated over there. it goes against the site's mission and for good reason. now as far as the straight hair avatar thing goes, i think thats going a bit overboard, but hey, your site, your rules. if i dont like it i dont have to be there. and currently im reserving my right to not be there. but the thing i admire about that atmosphere is how no matter how long or short, curly or nappy someone's hair is, they seem to love it for whatever it is or whatever it isnt. they have continuous threads celebrating and showing off twa, cnaps (hair with no curl pattern at all) and non shiny hair. and i dont get that same kind of self esteem or positivity that i used to get from this site. hell, ive been natural for 4 or 5 years now, and im just getting to the point where i honestly have that same self esteem about my hair. so it hurts me when i see the same types of behaviors or questions being posted here. and for me, i feel like thats what the majority of postings on this board are about. if you dont have hair longer than your shoulders (or youre not trying to grow your hair out), if youre not trying to "turn your kinks into curls" then no one really cares. for me, i feel like its the whole "good" hair "bad" hair thing all over again, except no one is using those words.
all hair boards are so powerful in influencing us and i think on every hair board ive been to, what turns me off about them is either the attitude of putting others down to raise themselves up or raising up others so high that you put yourself down. but i guess its something we all have to work on.