My beloved Samson is gone, died on 8/25/08

My Samson is gone.

I'm back. I'll probably still be on and off. It's hard because he used to lay by my feet while I used the laptop (which I took to using when he didn't go downstairs much, to be with him). My desktop computer is not up and running yet after dh's last upgrades. It's very quiet and lonely here now, with hubby at work and son back to school today. I had to get out of the house for a while today.

Life seems so much darker for me now. When I enter a room, I have to turn on the lights, even if it's daylight and sunny. Like the light has gone from my life. I'm kind of numb now, in limbo.

I'm going to ramble here, but I need to get this all out. Itís very emotional so feel free to skip to the end if needed.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Samson died at about 9:30 AM on Monday, August 25. We had planned to take him in at 2 PM, but I think he was dying and suffering during the night. He had a rough day Sunday, but we all spent time outside with him (most of the afternoon). He wanted to be outside, he kept regurgitating water, he was getting weak. He hadn't had much food for a few days already, didn't want to eat, but was so thirsty. The worst part was that he couldn't keep the water down anymore. I made him chicken broth and gelatin cubes, which he gobbled up, but they came back up as liquid later. He was dying of starvation and especially thirst.

Sunday night, he wanted to stay in the living room all night, so I set up to sleep on the couch by him. He didn't sleep, I held him and cuddled with him at times.
Samson was so thirsty, he chewed on ice cubes and I sometimes held a cube in my palm and he would lick it. I tried to get a little sleep in between because I knew I'd have to take him in. I was so exhausted after not much sleep for the last week or so, getting up with him when he'd regurgitate (frequently, stupid megaesophagus). He could have overcome that again, if he could have stood upright after eating and drinking, but his hind legs were getting too weak. He was just too old to beat it this time.

I don't know if he had aspirated pneumonia at this point, as his breathing was labored. I prayed that he would just fall asleep and pass away in my arms in his sleep. I'm angry that those prayers weren't answered. I didnít want him to have to suffer at all, he deserved so much better. But it seemed that he was suffering and I couldnít help him. His vet was closed, the local emergency one didnít have a vet on hand to euthanize (tech said she couldnít), I didnít want to take him to the next farthest one where he didnít know anyone. He loved going to the vets and visiting everyone there, they all loved him!

When my husband got up for work, he came out and found us. I told him it was time, and he lay down with Samson and held him for a while. First thing when they opened, I called the vets to bring him in. They did not have an opening, but his doctor loved him and said sheíd fit him in if we came in. So we got dressed and went in. My dad and hubby had to get him onto a blanket to carry him down the stairs and into the car. They brought out a gurney to bring him into the vets when we got there. He was just too weak to even stand. He was so dehydrated that his poor nose was shriveled and dry.

We were all there on the floor with him: me, hubby, son, my dad. The doctor came in to see us and check him, told us to take our time staying with him and saying our good-byes. She left to come back later. The tech came in to make the arrangements for cremation, etc. My son and I cried our eyes out, we held Samson and told him we loved him. The vet came back, started the shot and he started to relax, gave a big sigh. My son looked into his eyes and held his paw, I held him from behind and buried my face in his neck. His head drooped to his paws as he left us. We stayed with him for a long time afterward.

He was cremated on Wednesday, and we should get his ashes in the wooden box this week, along with his paw print in ceramic (for our son).

Samson had a long wonderful life, lived abroad and traveled to many places with us. He was loved by everyone he met. Even the staff at the vets all said he really was their best patient, so friendly and happy all the time, even after shots, etc. He was 13 years old, and loved by all.

(I'll see you again someday, my baby.)

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

I have updated his fotki album with more photos. There are some puppy pictures on the second page.

SF Bay Area, CA * "The Angel-Goddess-Guru of Haircoloring"
3b/c/a mix. medium texture, low porosity
My Motto: Strand Test! some hair pics
-- gone, but never forgotten.

Last edited by CurliLocks; 09-03-2008 at 10:48 AM.
I'm very sorry for your loss.


"Yesterday's history, tomorrow's a mystery, today is a gift . . . that's why it's called the present." - Unknown
This was heartbreaking for me to read and I didn't even know him.

I hope with time you will feel the light come back, and maybe eventually adopt another pet. Not a replacement, of course, but a new friend.

I am sorry for your loss.
This made me cry. I'm very sorry for your loss.
I'm so sorry, Curlilocks. I looked at his photos, and he looked like I imagined he would. I love the picture of him in his boots. What a sweetie pie.

It must be very hard to miss him. Please take comfort in the fact that Samson isn't suffering anymore and is now at peace. He obviously had a wonderful life and was loved much.

Peace and blessings to you. ((HUGS))
Loose botticelli curls and waves
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Oh my God......your tribute to Samson brought tears to my eyes. I'm so sorry he's gone.

For me, the hardest part of loving an animal is losing him so quickly, no matter what age they go.

I will keep both you and Samson in my thoughts.
This made me cry as well because I know how much it hurts to lose a pet. I'm so sorry for your loss.
I am so very sorry for your loss.
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I'm crying too. I'm so sorry!
*Poster formerly known as Bailey422*

Here's all you have to know about men and women: women are crazy, men are stupid. And the main reason women are crazy is that men are stupid. ~ George Carlin
I'm so sorry. Your post made me cry, it's so heartbreaking. I had a very similar situation with my dog a few years back though he had Lymphoma.
But really, I am so sorry.
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Words cannot express how sorry I am for you, that must have been heartbreaking to write, and live through.

That made me cry as well. I do hope that you will be able to, in time, find peace.
I am so sorry for your loss, Curlilocks. I know Samson knew even at the end that he was loved dearly. I am glad that you were able to be with him in his last moments. Someday that will be probably be comforting to you, but I can understand how raw the emotions are right now.
I'm so sorry.
Handle every stressful situation like a dog. If you can't eat it or hump it.....Piss on it and walk away.
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I'm so sorry for your loss.
Location: Chicago


"If you don't stand for something you will fall for anything."
ó Malcolm X
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I'm so sorry for your loss. I had a Samson once, too.
"Maybe Lucy's right. Of all the Charlie Browns in the world, you're the Charlie Browniest."--Linus, A Charlie Brown Christmas
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