How can I help educate other that going natural isn't bad, but rather good? (It might be a rant..)

I am finally done transitioning. I have last done the Japanese straightening treatment 3 years ago, and I had just grown tired of having to pay so much money every year to straighten it and I am tired of having to deal with my roots being different from the rest of my hair. I am now starting college, but I am still living with my parents to save money (otherwise, I wouldn't have enough money to complete college in 4 years.But yesterday my mom was giving me a hair time about my curly hair. In the latina community, curly hair is bad hair. and she isn't afraid to tell me that I look beautiful with straight hair, and ugly in curly hair. She feels a lot of pressure from the mainstream latina community to look a certain way, which is why she got plastic surgery, and continues to feel bad about herself. Including feeling bad about her own hair as well. She wears wigs to hide her natural hair, because she has misconceptions that she deeply believes in, and I have a hard time convincing her otherwise (unless I show her a clip of hair experts saying the same thing I am. For some reason she refuses to believe me until I provide solid evidence, or trusted sources (pros on TV shows or in books) that backs up my claims). Some of the misconceptions she believes in are as follows: having curly hair is bad because it "destroys itself" by tangling and falling out easily, that braids (and type, from french braids to protective styling braids), causes hair to "break" and get damaged, that hair is never supposed to fall out unless it is a health problem, that split ends don't climb up the hair shaft, and so shouldn't  be cut, long hair is healthy hair (which is why she hates me getting trims to cut off the split ends)  and that chemically straightening it with the japanese straightening treatment/CHI/thermal reconditioning is basically the only way to keep it healthy and make it easy to take care of. And therefore it was my fault that I now have trouble with tangles.... because I don't straighten it anymore. However, I had trouble with tangles before straightening because I did not know how to take care of curly hair, nor did my mother. my mother had a bad experience with a protective style (braids, about 10 years ago) because the lady who did them made it too tight, and my mother doesn't accept or acknowledge the fact that it is natural for hair to fall out because it is done with its resting phase. She is embarrassed about her hair to the point where she doesn't let anybody see it. Not even me, and I am her daughter. She doesn't get the straightening treatments because during consultations, the hairstylists usually tell her that it wouldn't produce the results the results she want with her hair. I want to teach her (or at least prove to her) that she shouldn't be embarrassed of her hair, that some hair fall is natural, and that her hair fall is natural too, that it is important to take care of it, that it is necessary to cut off split ends, that healthy hair doesn't always mean long hair, that it is easy to remain damage and tangle free if you take care of it properly, that healthy hair is beautiful hair, no matter the texture. Curly hair can be beautiful too. I want to show her that having curly hair doesn't make someone ugly. I want her to be confident again. So that is why I am wanting to educate her about curly hair first, so she can start to build up confidence, and that she shouldn't let mainstream society make her feel ugly. I want to show her that there is a whole community of people out there who have the same concerns and that she is not alone. but even though I try to tell her about sites like this again and again, she just refuses to check it out, probably because she thinks that nobody can really understand her. I typically have to pull up the articles for her, so she would read them. May I please receive advice so that I can educate her about curly hair, and show her that it isn't all that bad? 

6 Answers

hey, I read the whole rant that you wrote. I think you can totally be an inspiration to your mom. When I was little I loved my crazy curly hair, then when I got older, I didn't want the curls, so my hair was brushed and put in pony tails
I damaged my hair, alot, and about 6 years worth of damage, this year, I wanted it back, bad, and my parents would tell me I dont have curly hair, and I'm way to obsessed
I didn't give up, so I got products with no sulfates or silicones, got a haircut, had to spend my own money that I get from working, and I'm only a teenager! My hair is still is transitioning from dry wavy hair, too curly wavy hair, and it looks way healthi
I love what your doing here, very inspirational. Embracing it is the best thing a curly girl can do! Having curly hair and trichotilomania (ttm,trich) is difficult, but I manage to pull through
I really hope this helps, and I hope you inspire your mom, and others. Thank you very much!! Good luck!
let her watch some hair journey videos on YouTube they really give some people hope