What should I do about my all over thinning hair, short, and texturized hair??
Hi, I'm a 14 year old girl. I have 4c hair...well not 100% natural anymore because I got a texturizer for my graduation. My hair wasn't suitable for a big day to moving up to high school. I didn't wanted the texturizer tho. I didn't even knew what it was! Until it was applied to my head and I google it. I didn't know it was permeant! I didn't get this done by a salon I got this done by my mom. I don't know if she did it right tho all I know my hair completely change. She applied it like crazy all over my head. I've had perms before back like long time but I stop and I transition but now I have a texturizer. My hair it's ..kinda thin and short not because of the texturizer. It's due to excessive weave braiding and me not knowing how to maintain it in braids. If you can see my hair now it's so bad and horrible to get it to recover. I don't want to cut all my hair off. I don't know what to do to make it look nice! My mom will soon put me back in braids when school comes. You see 2 months me and my mom had a big argument! Very big about my hair. What happen was I didn't wanted to get braids or weave anymore because I feel my hair isn't strong or well enough for it! She didn't accept it because I represent her and I can't walk around looking horrible with my hair like that but the thing is my hair is thin all over my head! ..And who cares what people think! You know who you are. My mom and sisters still believe that braids make you're hair grow. I disagree because it's common knowledge! Nothing can make you're hair grow! It's only the rate of how you're hair grows and how good you take care of it! Braids isn't good for me! It isn't for me when taking care of my hair but I did felt wrong to my mom because not only did I argue with her, I disobey her :( I never wanted to hurt my mom feelings. I wanted something best for me. Only hair that's it! I just want my hair to be pretty. I get jealous of other girls straight long hair and natural long hairs. It sucks being me... My mom then let me go but I still have to get my hair braided for school. Which I wanted to ask what should I do? Get braids?? My texturizer hair is really confusing! When it's wet the curls come out since it loosing my curls but when it gets dry after wet it shrinks up, dry, and doesn't look good. I tried twists out but it's hard to do because of thin areas. *sighs* in my situation now it's hard to get hair products. The only things I can do now is shampoo sulfate free, co wash, or hot oil treatments (maybe). Can't moisturize because it's all used up! My mom is trying to get my hair products but it's taking her days! Today I prepoo then shampoo and try so hard to gets the bits of my coconut oil and shea moisture coconut and hibiscus but still left with dry hair because not enough. I'm confuse about PT and DC because they say too much protein in hair is bad! So I try not to do that but when I try to find a diy DC it also mayonnaise and things that sounds like PT like eggs and honey. I deep condition every week. And protein treatment monthly. *sighs* please give me some advice? I hate my hair!! Not my texture, my hair itself!
Try using Hot oil treatments once a week also deep condition your hair will help give it body and great texture . Hair is like a baby it needs lots of attention .
Yes, braiding could be stressful to your hair if your hair is thin, dry and unhealthy, if the braiding is too tight and if your own hair is not properly care for before braiding or while in braids. When I wear braids I treat my braids as I would my own hair.I mist, moisturize and oil hair and braids. I wash, condition, and deep condition, and do protein treatments as needed. I would wear a loc soc or braid cap every night. Youneed to remember your hair is still there, don’t forget about it just because it’s braided. How do you want your natural hair to be? Is your goal to get your hair healthy to wear in its natural state as a chunky Afro or in flat, two strand twists, or washand go style?Make sure you know what you want before you share it with your mother. Show your mother how you would like your hair to be when you walk across the stage four years from now. Set a realistic goal.Have you tried educating (talking) your mother on the care of 4C hair? That is the first step.You are only 14 and can’t do much without your mother’s permission. So, arm yourself with informative, helpful, but educational 4C YouTube videos for the care and maintenance of 4C hair.Show your mother realistic goals you would like to obtain with your hair. If you have 4C, don’t aim for styles that only a 3C could rock. Do you know if thin hair runs in your family, if it does then it’s not too much that could be done to alter the state of your hair. Still thin hair can be healthy, beautiful and hold style. From what you wrote, It seems as if your hair is in need of some deep conditioning.You may need moisture, oil and protein or all three.I am a 4C, and I need all three to keep my hair healthy, along with proper cleaning and conditioning. It has to be balanced. You need to learn your hair.You need to learn about the care of 4C hair.There is so much knowledge out there, so learn it and share with your mother. Search 4C natural hair in YouTube. Find someone that reflects YOU and YOUR HAIR! Show your mother a naturalist 4C hair journey. Show her how the naturali ststarted with a BC (big chop) TWA (tweeny weenie afro) and ends up with long natural hair to her shoulder or even longer (only show 4C videos). If your mother still is not willing to compromise with you,then there’s nothing you can do as you said, but compromise with yourself; so perhaps, you could make your mother happy by getting larger braids or plaits(such as Kenya, box braids, nicely styled cornrow), and include misting with water, conditioner, and oil as part of your daily regimen.Try not to keep the braids longer than two months, at the most three months, Take out and give your hair a break for as long as possible and re-braid if your mother insist. If she doesn’t readilyagree, don’t give up continue to share your thoughts and knowledge with her,and you continue to grow and one day she may see the wisdom in your words. Be happy!
It sounds like you're actually doing all the things you can right now. Only thing is to try to talk to your mom more. You're right -- more braids or weaves will only make the problem worse. I went natural the summer I graduated from high school. My mom didn't understand because she thought I would look bad for my first semester of college. And maybe I did! But it takes TIME to learn and let your hair breathe and grow. Now my mom herself went natural! Honestly it will just take time for parents to come around.