how can i find the right hairstylist, no one i've tried gets my curly, dry hair
Have you tried the salon finder on this site? http://www.naturallycurly.com/curlsalons/
If there's no one close by on the directory KinkyWinky linked to (as was the case for me), unfortunately you just have to go by trial and error. Unless you get lucky and meet someone with curly hair that has a hair cut you like, then you can ask them where they get their hair cut! I hope you have better luck than me... I had to go to 4 different stylists before I finally found one who would actually treat my hair right and listen to me. Don't give up!
You can also try finding a DevaCurl Specialist via http://www.mydevacurl.com/curly_stylist_finder. Put in your zip code and it will find salons closest to you that specialize in cutting curly hair dry. Best bet: call ahead and make sure they do this!